Anthony de Mello

Born: September 4, 1931

Die: June 2, 1987

Occupation: Writer

Quotes of Anthony de Mello

Anthony de Mello

You have within yourself the answer to every question you propose - if you only knew how to look for it. In the Land of the spirit, you cannot walk by the light of someone else's lamp. You want to borrow...

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Anthony de Mello

These things will destroy the human race: politics without principle, progress without compassion, wealth without work, learning without silence, religion without fearlessness and worship without awareness.

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Anthony de Mello

It is a great mystery that though the human heart longs for Truth, in which alone it finds liberation and delight, the first reaction of human beings to Truth is one of hostility and fear!

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Anthony de Mello

People mistakenly assume that their thinking is done by their head; it is actually done by the heart which first dictates the conclusion, then commands the head to provide the reasoning that will defend...

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Anthony de Mello

What is a loving heart? A loving heart is sensitive to the whole of life, to all persons; a loving heart doesn't harden itself to any persons or things.

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Anthony de Mello

As the Arabs say, "The nature of rain is the same, but it makes thorns grow in the marshes and flowers in the gardens.

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Anthony de Mello

In many ways we were drugged when we were young. We were brought up to need people. For what? For acceptance, approval, appreciation, applause.

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Anthony de Mello

"That of the person who sees other human beings as sinners," said the Master.

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Anthony de Mello

Pleasant experiences make life delightful. Painful experiences lead to growth.

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Anthony de Mello

You have to understand, my dears, that the shortest distance between truth and a human being is a story.

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Anthony de Mello

People who deliberate fully before they take a step will spend their lives on one leg

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Anthony de Mello

Enlightenment is: absolute cooperation with the inevitable.

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Anthony de Mello

And increasingly - you know this and so do I we're losing the youth everywhere. They hate us; they are not interested in having more fears and guilt laid on them. They're not interested in more sermons...

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Anthony de Mello

When the eye is unobstructed, the result is sight. When the ear is unobstructed, the result is hearing. When the mind is unobstructed the result is truth. When the heart is unobstructed, the result is...

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Anthony de Mello

There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.

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Anthony de Mello

The philosopher Diogenes was eating bread and lentils for supper. He was seen by the philosopher Aristippus, who lived comfortably by flattering the king. Said Aristippus, "If you would learn to be subservient...

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Anthony de Mello

What I really enjoy is not you; it's something that's greater than both you and me. It is something that I discovered, a kind of symphony, a kind of orchestra that plays one melody in your presence, but...

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Anthony de Mello

Everybody was talking about the religious man who committed suicide. While no one in the monastery approved of the man's action, some say they admired his faith. Faith?" said the Master. He had the courage...

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Anthony de Mello

There's only one reason why you're not experiencing bliss at this present moment, and it's because you're thinking or focusing on what you don't have....But, right now you have everything you need to be...

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Anthony de Mello

the greatest learning of the ages lies in accepting life exactly as it comes to us.

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Anthony de Mello

All conflict comes from attachment.

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Anthony de Mello

Waking up is unpleasant, you know. You are nice and comfortable in bed. It is irritating to be woken up. That's the reason the wise guru will not attempt to wake people up. I hope I'm going to be wise...

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Anthony de Mello

When you get rid of your fear of failure, your tensions about succeeding... you can be yourself. Relaxed. You'll no longer be driving with your brakes on.

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Anthony de Mello

Those who make no mistakes are making the biggest mistakes of all - they are attempting nothing new.

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Anthony de Mello

We do not have a fear of the unknown. What we fear is giving up the known.

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Anthony de Mello

"I seek the meaning of existence," said the stranger. "You are of course assuming," said the Master, "that existence has a meaning." "Doesn't it?" "When you experience existence as it is - not as you think...

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Anthony de Mello

A man who took great pride in his lawn found himself with a large crop of dandelions. He tried every method he knew to get rid of them. Still they plagued him. Finally he wrote the department of agriculture....

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Anthony de Mello

You're not living until it doesn't matter a tinker's damn to you whether you live or die. At that point you live. When you're ready to lose your life, you live it.

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Anthony de Mello

The master never seemed to have his fill of gazing at his firstborn child. "What do you want him to be when he grows up?" someone asked. "Outrageously happy," said the master.

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Anthony de Mello

The seeker says, "I do not know." That takes honesty. The master says, "I do not know." That takes a mystic's mind that knows things through non-knowing. The disciple says, "I know." That takes ignorance,...

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Anthony de Mello

Said the monk: "All these mountains and rivers and the earth and stars - where do they come from?" Said the master: "Where does your question come from?"

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Anthony de Mello

"What is the secret of your serenity?" Said the master: "Wholehearted cooperation with the inevitable."

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Anthony de Mello

"My former master taught me to accept birth and death." "Then what have you come to me for?" asked the master. "To learn to accept what lies in between."

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Anthony de Mello

"Why is everyone here so happy except me?" "Because they have learned to see goodness and beauty everywhere," said the Master. "Why don't I see goodness and beauty everywhere?" "Because you cannot see...

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Anthony de Mello

What you are aware of you are in control of; what you are not aware of is in control of you.

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Anthony de Mello

Most people tell you they want to get out of kindergarten, but don't believe them. Don't believe them! All they want you to do is to mend their broken toys. "Give me back my wife. Give me back my job....

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Anthony de Mello

Wouldn't it be wonderful if we had a world where everybody said, 'We don't know?' The fact is that you're surrounded -God and you don't see God, because you KNOW ABOUT God. The final barrier to the vision...

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Anthony de Mello

You keep insisting, I feel good because the world is right! Wrong! The world is right because I feel good. That's what all the mystics are saying.

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Anthony de Mello

The world is right because I feel good. p. 83, Awareness, copyright 1990

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Anthony de Mello

The only way to change is by changing your understanding.

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Anthony de Mello

The disciples were absorbed in a discussion of Lao-Tzu's dictum: "Those who know, do not say; Those who say, do not know." When the master entered, they asked him what the words meant. Said the master,...

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Anthony de Mello

A nice definition of an awakened person: a person who no longer marches to the drums of society, a person who dances to the tune of the music that springs up from within.

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Anthony de Mello

This truth I firmly hold, all evidence to the contrary notwithstanding; my life has been a gift, a blessing to the world.

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Anthony de Mello

the tragedy of an attachment is that if its object is not attained it causes unhappiness. But if it is attained, it does not cause happiness – it merely causes a flash of pleasure followed by weariness,...

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Anthony de Mello

Live your life as you see fit. That's not selfish. Selfish is to demand that others live their lives as you see fit.

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Anthony de Mello

You see persons and things not as they are but as you are.

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Anthony de Mello

Most people don't live aware lives. They live mechanical lives, mechanical thoughts - generally somebody else's - mechanical emotions, mechanical actions, mechanical reactions.

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Anthony de Mello

We're crazy, We're living on crazy ideas about love, about relationships, about happiness, about joy, about everything.

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Anthony de Mello

Spirituality means waking up. Most people, even though they don't know it, are asleep. They're born asleep, they live asleep, they marry in their sleep, they breed children in their sleep, they die in...

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Anthony de Mello

You know, all mystics - Catholic, Christian, non-Christian, no matter what their theology, no matter what their religion - are unanimous on one thing: that all is well, all is well. Though everything is...

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Anthony de Mello

If what you seek is Truth, there is one thing you must have above all else.” “I know. An overwhelming passion for it.” “No. An unremitting readiness to admit you may be wrong.

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Anthony de Mello

People who want a cure, provided they can have it without pain, are like those who favour progress, provided they can have it without change.

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Anthony de Mello

As soon as you look at the world through an ideology you are finished. No reality fits an ideology. Life is beyond that. … That is why people are always searching for a meaning to life… Meaning is...

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Anthony de Mello

Any time you are with anyone or think of anyone you must say to yourself: I am dying and this person too is dying, attempting the while to experience the truth of the words you are saying. If every one...

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Anthony de Mello

The present moment is never intolerable. What's intolerable is what's going to happen in the next four hours. To have your body here at 8 pm and your mind at 10:30 pm, that's what causes us suffering.

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Anthony de Mello

Happiness is not something you acquire; love is not something you produce; love is not something you have; love is something that has you.

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Anthony de Mello

There is another more subtle way in which the innocence of childhood is lost: when the child is infected with the desire to become somebody. Contemplate the crowds of people who are striving might and...

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Anthony de Mello

You sanctify whatever you are grateful for.

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Anthony de Mello

Life is easy, life is delightful. It's only hard on your illusions, your ambitions, your greed, your cravings.

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Anthony de Mello

A newly married couple said, "What shall we do to make our love endure?" Said the Master, "Love other things together"....

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Anthony de Mello

Think of a flabby person covered with layers of fat. That is what your mind can become - flabby, covered with layers of fat till it becomes too dull and lazy to think, to observe, to explore, to discover...

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Anthony de Mello

The day you are happy for no reason whatsoever, the day you find yourself taking delight in everything and in nothing, you will know that you have found the land of unending joy called the kingdom.

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Anthony de Mello

Silence is not the absence of sound, but the absence of self.

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Anthony de Mello

When you fight something, you're tied to it forever. As long as you're fighting it, you’re giving it power.

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Anthony de Mello

The Master made it his task to destroy systematically every doctrine, every belief, every concept of the divine, for these things, which were originally intended as pointers, were now being taken as descriptions....

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Anthony de Mello

The genius of a composer is found in the notes of his music; but analyzing the notes will not reveal his genius. The poet's greatness is contained in his words; yet the study of his words will not disclose...

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Anthony de Mello

When you are guilty, it is not your sins you hate but yourself.

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Anthony de Mello

Wisdom tends to grow in proportion to one's awareness of one's ignorance.

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Anthony de Mello

Every word, every image used for God is a distortion more than a description.

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Anthony de Mello

Thought can organize the world so well that you are no longer able to see it.

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Anthony de Mello

A thought is a screen, not a mirror; that is why you live in a thought envelope, untouched by Reality.

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Anthony de Mello

You do not have to change for God to love you.

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Anthony de Mello

Problems exist only in the human mind.

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Anthony de Mello

You are so proud of your intelligence," said the master. "You are like a like a condemned man, proud of the vastness of his prison cell.

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Anthony de Mello

We live in a flash of light; evening comes and it is night forever. It's only a flash and we waste it. We waste it with our anxiety, our worries, our concerns, our burdens.

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Anthony de Mello

Don't ask the world to change....you change first.

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Anthony de Mello

Are you your clothes? Are you your name? Are you your profession? Stop identifying with them. They come and go

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Anthony de Mello

Perfect love casts out fear. Where there is love there are no demands, no expectations, no dependency. I do not demand that you make me happy; my happiness does not lie in you. If you were to leave me,...

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Anthony de Mello

The spiritual quest is a journey without distance. You travel from where you are right now To where you have always been. From ignorance to recognition...

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Anthony de Mello

"What is love?"; "The total absence of fear," said the Master; "What is it we fear?"; "Love," said the Master.

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Anthony de Mello

Obedience keeps the rules. Love knows when to break them.

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Anthony de Mello

If you want to know what it means to be happy, look at a flower, a bird, a child; they are perfect images of the kingdom. For they live from moment to moment in the eternal now with no past and no future.

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Anthony de Mello

Behold God beholding you...and smiling.

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Anthony de Mello

One day, a philosopher asked, "What is the purpose of creation?" "Lovemaking," said the Master. Later, to his disciples, he said, "Before creation, love was. After creation, love was made. When love is...

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Anthony de Mello

The three most difficult things for a human being are not physical feats or intellectual achievements. They are, first, returning love for hate; second, including the excluded; third, admitting that you...

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Anthony de Mello

If you look carefully you will see that there is one thing and only one thing that causes unhappiness. The name of that thing is attachment. What is an attachment? An emotional state of clinging caused...

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Anthony de Mello

If it is peace you want, seek to change yourself, not other people. It is easier to protect your feet with slippers than to carpet the whole of the earth.

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Anthony de Mello

Because you cannot see outside of you what you fail to see inside.

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Anthony de Mello

When you come to see you are not as wise today as you thought you were yesterday, you are wiser today.

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Anthony de Mello

Can one talk about the ocean to a frog in a well or about the divine to people who are restricted by their concepts?

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Anthony de Mello

The butterfly in a caterpillar: the eagle in an egg; the saint in a selfish human being.

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Anthony de Mello

When someone offends you, you can raise your spirits to heights where offenses cannot reach.

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Anthony de Mello

There's nothing you can do to see — it is a gift.

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Anthony de Mello

When the sage points at the moon, all that the idiot sees is the finger.

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Anthony de Mello

I'm going to write a book someday and the title will be I'm an Ass, You're an Ass. That's the most liberating, wonderful thing in the world, when you openly admit you're an ass. It's wonderful. When people...

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Anthony de Mello

The Master would insist that the final barrier to our attaining God was the word and concept God.

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Anthony de Mello

All I did was sit on the riverbank handing out river water. After I'm gone, I trust you will notice the river.

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Anthony de Mello

As you identify less and less with the “me”, you will be more at ease with everybody and with everything. Do you know why? Because you are no longer afraid of being hurt or not liked. You no longer...

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Anthony de Mello

Another illusion is that external events have the power to hurt you, that other people have the power to hurt you. They don't. It's you who give this power to them.

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Anthony de Mello

As the Japanese Zen masters say, “Don't seek the truth; just drop your opinions”. Drop your theories; don't seek the truth.

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Anthony de Mello

The sun and its light, the ocean and the wave, the singer and his song — not one. Not two.

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Anthony de Mello

The human mind makes foolish divisions in what love sees as one.

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Anthony de Mello

There were rules in the monastery, but the Master always warned against the tyranny of the law. 'Obedience keeps the rules,' he would say. 'Love knows when to break them.'

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Anthony de Mello

Understand the obstructions you are putting in the way of love, freedom, and happiness and they will drop. Turn on the light of awareness and the darkness will disappear. Happiness is not something you...

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Anthony de Mello

You've got to drop something. You've got to drop illusions. You don't have to add anything in order to be happy; you've got to drop something. Life is easy, life is delightful. It's only hard on your illusions,...

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Anthony de Mello

Charity is never so lovely as when one has lost consciousness that one is practicing charity. 'You mean I helped you? I was enjoying myself. I was just doing my dance. It helped you, that's wonderful....

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Anthony de Mello

A master was once unmoved by the complaints of his disciples that, though they listened with pleasure to his parables and stories, they were also frustrated for they longed for something deeper. To all...

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Anthony de Mello

Both what you run from- and what you yearn for - are within you.

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Anthony de Mello

Loneliness is not cured by human company. Loneliness is cured by contact with reality.

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Anthony de Mello

...As the great Confucius said, "The one who would be in constant happiness must frequently change." Flow. But we keep looking back, don't we? We cling to things in the past and cling to things in the...

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Anthony de Mello

The way to really live is to die. The passport to living is to imagine yourself in your grave. Imagine you're lying in your coffin....Now look at your problems from that viewpoint. Changes everything,...

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Anthony de Mello

So love the thought of death, love it.

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Anthony de Mello

Suffering is given to you that you might open your eyes to the truth.

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Anthony de Mello

Do you want a sign that you're asleep? Here it is: you're suffering. Suffering is a sign that you're out of touch with the truth. Suffering is given to you that you might open your eyes to the truth, that...

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Anthony de Mello

When you cling, life is destroyed; when you hold on to anything, you cease to live.

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Anthony de Mello

Rare indeed, is the relationship in which the other is not cultivated for what one can get for oneself.

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Anthony de Mello

The Rose does not preen herself to catch my eye. She blooms because she blooms. A saint is a saint until he knows he is one.

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Anthony de Mello

Problems only exist in the human mind.

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Anthony de Mello

The only way that someone can be of help to you is by challenging your ideas.

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Anthony de Mello

‎"I have no fear of losing u, for you aren't an object of my property, or anyone else's. I love you as you are, without attachment, without fears, without conditions, without egoism, trying not to absorb...

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“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”

― Dr. Seuss