George Bernard Shaw

Born: July 26, 1856

Die: November 2, 1950

Occupation: Playwright

Quotes of George Bernard Shaw

George Bernard Shaw

All professions are conspiracies against the laity.

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George Bernard Shaw

Education can and should do much influence social, moral and intellectual discovery by stimulating critical attitudes of thought in the young

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George Bernard Shaw

A Native American elder once described his own inner struggles in this manner: Inside of me there are two dogs. One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good. The mean dog fights the good dog...

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George Bernard Shaw

The truth sticks in our throats with all the sauces it is served with: it will never go down until we take it without any sauce at all.

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George Bernard Shaw

Our first duty is not to be poor.

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George Bernard Shaw

A learned man is an idler who kills time by study.

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George Bernard Shaw

The real moment of success is not the moment apparent to the crowd.

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George Bernard Shaw

The harder I work the more I live.

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George Bernard Shaw

You accepted Allah or you had your throat cut by someone who did accept him, and who went to Paradise for having sent you to Hell.

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George Bernard Shaw

Most people go to their grave with their music inside them.

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George Bernard Shaw

It's just as unpleasant to get more than you bargain for as to get less.

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George Bernard Shaw

The wheels are turning, but the hamsters are all dead. Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot. I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig, you get dirty; and besides, the pig likes...

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George Bernard Shaw

I love little children too but I don't cut off their heads and stick them in vases.

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George Bernard Shaw

HIGGINS. Have you no morals, man? DOOLITTLE [unabashed] Cant afford them, Governor. Neither could you if you was as poor as me.

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George Bernard Shaw

I am sorry to have to introduce the subject of Christmas. It is an indecent subject; a cruel, gluttonous subject; a drunken, disorderly subject; a wasteful, disastrous subject; a wicked, cadging, lying,...

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George Bernard Shaw

The English are not a very spiritual people, so they invented cricket to give them some idea of eternity.

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George Bernard Shaw

The plain working truth is that it is not only good for people to be shocked occasionally, but absolutely necessary to the progress of society that they should be shocked pretty often.

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George Bernard Shaw

When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth.

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George Bernard Shaw

All this struggling and striving to make the world better is a great mistake. Not that it's wrong to try to improve the world if you know how but simply because struggling and striving are the worst possible...

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George Bernard Shaw

Captain Shotover: How much does your soul eat? Ellie: Oh, a lot. It eats music and pictures and books and mountains and lakes and beautiful things to wear and nice people to be with.

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George Bernard Shaw

I can't turn your soul on. Leave me those feelings; and you can take away the voice and the face. They are not you.

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George Bernard Shaw

What the world calls originality is only an unaccustomed method of tickling it.

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George Bernard Shaw

The camera can represent flesh so superbly that, if I dared, I would never photograph a figure without asking that figure to take its clothes off.

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George Bernard Shaw

If women were as fastidious as men, morally or physically, there would be an end of the race.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is the highest creatures who take the longest to mature, and are the most helpless during their immaturity.

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George Bernard Shaw

Start with the belief that your life can indeed be changed, and that you have the power to change it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Hell is paved with good intentions, not with bad ones. All men mean well.

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George Bernard Shaw

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. The bureaucracy consists of functionaries; the aristocracy, of idols; the democracy, of idolaters. The populace cannot understand the bureaucracy:...

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George Bernard Shaw

Men are not governed by justice, but by law or persuasion. When they refuse to be governed by law or persuasion, they have to be governed by force or fraud, or both.

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George Bernard Shaw

To me the sole hope of human salvation lies in teaching Man to regard himself as an experiment in the realization of God, to regard his hands as God's hand, his brain as God's brain, his purpose as God's...

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George Bernard Shaw

It is easy - terribly easy - to shake a man's faith in himself. To take advantage of that to break a man's spirit is devil's work.

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George Bernard Shaw

We want a few mad people now. See where the sane ones have landed us!

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George Bernard Shaw

Whisky is liquid sunshine.

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George Bernard Shaw

The ordinary man is an anarchist. He wants to do as he likes. He may want his neighbour to be governed, but he himself doesn't want to be governed. He is mortally afraid of government officials and policemen.

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George Bernard Shaw

We know now that the soul is the body, and the body the soul. They tell us they are different because they want to persuade us that we can keep our souls if we let them make slaves of our bodies.

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George Bernard Shaw

Man is the only animal which esteems itself rich in proportion to the number and voracity of its parasites.

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George Bernard Shaw

My religion? Well, my dear, I am a Millionaire. That is my religion.

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George Bernard Shaw

Write your Sad times in Sand, Write your Good times in Stone.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you teach a man anything, he will never learn.

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George Bernard Shaw

You don't learn to hold your own in the world by standing on guard, but by attacking, and getting well hammered yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

We are the masters at the moment, and not only at the moment, but for a very long time to come.

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George Bernard Shaw

Even the youngest of us may be wrong sometimes.

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George Bernard Shaw

Youth, which is forgiven everything, forgives itself nothing: age, which forgives itself everything, is forgiven nothing.

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George Bernard Shaw

Time enough to think of the future when you haven't any future to think of.

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George Bernard Shaw

Thus, I blush to add, you can not be a philosopher and a good man, though you may be a philosopher and a great one.

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George Bernard Shaw

Justice is justice though it's always delayed and finally done only by mistake.

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George Bernard Shaw

Morals are a luxury of the rich.

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George Bernard Shaw

Be like the sun and meadow, which are not in the least concerned about the coming winter.

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George Bernard Shaw

When you prevent me from doing anything I want to do, that is persecution; when I prevent you from doing anything you want to do, that is law, order, and morals.

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George Bernard Shaw

To me the sole hope of human salvation lies in teaching.

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George Bernard Shaw

Hatred is the coward's revenge for being intimidated.

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George Bernard Shaw

The only person who acts sensibly is my tailor. He takes my measure anew every time he sees me. Everyone else goes by their old measurements.

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George Bernard Shaw

Get out of my way; for I won't stop for you.

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George Bernard Shaw

Life is not meant to be easy, my child; but take courage: it can be delightful.

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George Bernard Shaw

A book is like a child: it is easier to bring it into the world than to control it when it is launched there.

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George Bernard Shaw

This is the true joy of life-the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one, the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown to the scrap-heap; the being a force of nature instead...

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George Bernard Shaw

Greatness is one of the sensations of littleness

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George Bernard Shaw

I was a freethinker before I knew how to think.

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George Bernard Shaw

What is life but a series of inspired follies? The difficulty is to find them to do. Never lose a chance: it doesn’t come every day.

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George Bernard Shaw

He who has never hoped can never despair

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George Bernard Shaw

Words are only postage stamps delivering the object for you to unwrap

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George Bernard Shaw

My method is to take the utmost trouble to find the right thing to say, and then to say it with the utmost levity.

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George Bernard Shaw

A succession of eye-openers each involving the repudiation of some previously held belief.

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George Bernard Shaw

Ireland, sir, for good or evil, is like no other place under heaven, and no man can touch its sod or breathe its air without becoming better or worse.

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George Bernard Shaw

Think of the fierce energy concentrated in an acorn! You bury it in the ground, and it explodes into an oak! Bury a sheep, and nothing happens but decay.

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George Bernard Shaw

Never repeat old grievances.

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George Bernard Shaw

A child hasn't a grown-up person's appetite for affection. A little of it goes a long way with them; and they like a good imitation of it better than the real thing, as every nurse knows.

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George Bernard Shaw

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.

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George Bernard Shaw

As long as more people will pay admission to a theater to see a naked body than to see a naked brain, the drama will languish.

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George Bernard Shaw

Who is this Baby Ruth? And what does she do?

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George Bernard Shaw

When you want to put something into your part that is not in the play, you must ask the author-or some other author-to lead up to the interpolation for you. Never forget that the effect of a line may depend...

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George Bernard Shaw

People have pointed out evidences of personal feeling in my notices as if they were accusing me of a misdemeanor, not knowing that criticism written without personal feeling is not worth reading. It is...

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George Bernard Shaw

Imprisonment is as irrevocable as death.

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George Bernard Shaw

Of the three official objects of our prison system: vengeance, deterrence, and reformation of the criminal, only one is achieved; and that is the one which is nakedly abominable.

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George Bernard Shaw

While we have prisons it matters little which of us occupy the cells.

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George Bernard Shaw

We must all share in the evils of the world or move to another planet.

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George Bernard Shaw

Is the devil to have all the passions as well as all the good tunes?

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George Bernard Shaw

The sound body is the product of the sound mind.

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George Bernard Shaw

I have not wasted my life trifling with literary fools in taverns, as Johnson did, when he should have been shaking England with the thunder of his spirit

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George Bernard Shaw

Although I cannot lay an egg, I am a very good judge of omelettes

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George Bernard Shaw

Fashions are the only induced epidemics, proving that epidemics can be induced by tradesmen.

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George Bernard Shaw

We learn from history that we learn nothing from history.

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George Bernard Shaw

Any belief worth having must survive doubt

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George Bernard Shaw

A healthy nation is as unconscious of its nationality as a healthy man of his bones. But if you break a person's nationality it will think of nothing else but getting it set again.

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George Bernard Shaw

Decency is indecency's conspiracy of silence

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George Bernard Shaw

I have studied him - the wonderful man - and in my opinion far from being an anti-Christ he must be called the saviour of humanity.

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George Bernard Shaw

Marriage is to me apostasy, profanation of the sanctuary of my soul, violation of my manhood, sale of my birthright, shameful surrender, ignominious capitulation, acceptance of defeat.

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George Bernard Shaw

Martyrdom, sir, is what these people like: it is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability.

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George Bernard Shaw

[Chess] is a foolish expedient for making idle people believe they are doing something very clever, when they are only wasting their time.

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George Bernard Shaw

The word morality, if we met it in the Bible, would surprise us as much as the word telephone or motor car.

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George Bernard Shaw

As long as I have a want, I have a reason for living. Satisfaction is death.

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George Bernard Shaw

I have defined the hundred per cent American as ninety-nine per cent an idiot.

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George Bernard Shaw

The quality of a play is the quality of its ideas.

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George Bernard Shaw

War does not decide who is right but who is left.

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George Bernard Shaw

A cigarette is a pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other.

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George Bernard Shaw

I am very sorry, but I cannot learn languages. I have tried hard, only to find that men of ordinary capacity can learn Sanskrit in less time that it takes me to buy a German Dictionary

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George Bernard Shaw

You are my inspiration and my folly. You are my light across the sea, my million nameless joys, and my day's wage. You are my divinity, my madness, my selfishness, my transfiguration and purification....

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George Bernard Shaw

Confusing monogamy with morality has done more to destroy the conscience of the human race than any other error.

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George Bernard Shaw

Physically there is nothing to distinguish human society from the farm-yard except that children are more troublesome and costly than chickens and calves and that men and women are not so completely enslaved...

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George Bernard Shaw

The test of good education is seeing how it behaves in a fight.

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George Bernard Shaw

The things most people want to know about are usually none of their business.

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George Bernard Shaw

If only for a half hour a day, a child should do something serviceable to the community

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George Bernard Shaw

You see things and you say, 'Why?'. But I dream things and I say, 'Why not?'.

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George Bernard Shaw

I fought linotype and montype for some time because it would not justify as well as handset could be made to do; but at last, as always happens, the machine outdid the hand, and got all the best types...

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George Bernard Shaw

My schooling not only failed to teach me what it professed to be teaching, but prevented me from being educated to an extent which infuriates me when I think of all I might have learned at home by myself.

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George Bernard Shaw

What we call education and culture is for the most part nothing but the substitution of reading for experience, of literature for life, of the obsolete fictitious for the contemporary real.

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George Bernard Shaw

Love is a simple thing and a deep thing: it is an act of life and not an illusion. Art is an illusion.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is the inefficiency and sham of ... our schools ... that save us from being dashed on the rocks of false doctrine instead of drifting down the midstream of mere ignorance.

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George Bernard Shaw

Civilization is a disease produced by the practice of building societies with rotten material.

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George Bernard Shaw

Those who admire modern civilization usually identify it with the steam engine and the electric telegraph.

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George Bernard Shaw

Morality consists of suspecting other people of not being legally married.

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George Bernard Shaw

The universal regard for money is the one hopeful fact in our civilization. Money is the most important thing in the world. It represents health, strength, honor, generosity and beauty . . . . Not the...

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George Bernard Shaw

Hell is full of musical amateurs.

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George Bernard Shaw

The technical history of modern harmony is a history of growth of toleration by the human ear of chords that at first sounded discordant and senseless to the main body of contemporary professional musicians.

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George Bernard Shaw

We're human beings we are - all of us - and that's what people are liable to forget. Human beings don't like peace and goodwill and everybody loving everybody else. However much they may think they do,...

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George Bernard Shaw

Music is the brandy of the damned.

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George Bernard Shaw

The roulette table pays nobody except him that keeps it. Nevertheless a passion for gaming is common, though a passion for keeping roulette tables is unknown.

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George Bernard Shaw

In gambling the many must lose in order that the few may win.

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George Bernard Shaw

I hope you have lost your good looks, for while they last any fool can adore you, and the adoration of fools is bad for the soul. No, give me a ruined complexion and a lost figure and sixteen chins on...

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George Bernard Shaw

Life is like a flame that is always burning itself out...

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George Bernard Shaw

When commenting on the turmoil and disorder of the world, If the other planets are inhabited, they must be using this earth as their insane asylum.

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George Bernard Shaw

Criminals do not die by the hands of the law. They die by the hands of other men.

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George Bernard Shaw

The goal of an artist is to create the definitive work that cannot be surpassed.

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George Bernard Shaw

Patriotism is a pernicious, psychopathic form of idiocy.

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George Bernard Shaw

A photographer is like a cod, which produces a million eggs in order that one may reach maturity.

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George Bernard Shaw

Of all the anti-social vested interests the worst is the vested interest in ill-health.

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George Bernard Shaw

The policy of letting things alone, in the practical sense that the Government should never interfere with business or go into business itself, is called Laisser-faire by economists and politicians. It...

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George Bernard Shaw

If all the Churches of Europe closed their doors until the drums ceased rolling they would act as a most powerful reminder that though the glory of war is a famous and ancient glory, it is not the final...

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George Bernard Shaw

Murder and capital punishment are not opposites that cancel one another, but similars that breed their kind. It is the deed that teaches not the name we give it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Cruelty must be whitewashed by a moral excuse, and pretense of reluctance.

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George Bernard Shaw

The churches must learn humility as well as teach it.

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George Bernard Shaw

The truth is the one thing that nobody will believe.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is well to be off with the old woman before you're on with the new.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is not pleasure that makes life worth living. It is life that makes pleasure worth having.

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George Bernard Shaw

We are not taught to think decently on sex subjects, and consequently we have no language for them except indecent language.

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George Bernard Shaw

The schoolmaster is the person who takes the children off the parents' hands for a consideration. That is to say, he establishes a child prison, engages a number of employee schoolmasters as turnkeys,...

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George Bernard Shaw

I have never thought much of the courage of a lion tamer. Inside the cage he is at least safe from other men. There is not much harm in a lion. He has no ideals, no religion, no politics, no chivalry,...

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George Bernard Shaw

Sister, you're trying to keep me alive as an old curiosity, but I'm done, I'm finished, I'm going to die.

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George Bernard Shaw

Dying is a troublesome business: there is pain to be suffered, and it wrings one's heart; but death is a splendid thing -a warfare accomplished, a beginning all over again, a triumph. You can always see...

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George Bernard Shaw

We have in England a curious belief in first-rate people, meaning all the people we do not know; and this consoles us for the undeniable second-rateness of the people we do know.

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George Bernard Shaw

What God hath joined together no man shall put asunder: God will take care of that.

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George Bernard Shaw

In the Middle Ages people believed that the earth was flat, for which they had at least the evidence of their senses: we believe it to be round, not because as many as 1 percent of us could give physical...

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George Bernard Shaw

To withhold deserved praise lest it should make its object conceited is as dishonest as to withhold payment of a just debt lest your creditor should spend the money badly.

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George Bernard Shaw

Reasonable men adapt themselves to their environment; unreasonable men try to adapt their environment to themselves. Thus all progress is the result of the efforts of unreasonable men.

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George Bernard Shaw

I dread success. To have succeeded is to have finished one's business on earth, like the male spider who is killed by the female the moment he has succeeded in his courtship. I like the state of continual...

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George Bernard Shaw

We throw the whole drudgery of creation on one sex, and then imply that no female of any delicacy would initiate any effort in that direction.

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George Bernard Shaw

A tranquil woman can go on sewing longer than an angry man can go on fuming.

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George Bernard Shaw

Of the two lots, the woman's lot of perpetual motherhood, and the man's of perpetual babyhood, I prefer the man's.

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George Bernard Shaw

Women have been a ghastly nuisance in my life.

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George Bernard Shaw

Woman reduces us all to a common denominator.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is assumed that the woman must wait, motionless, until she is wooed. That is how the spider waits for the fly.

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George Bernard Shaw

You sometimes have to answer a woman according to her womanliness, just as you have to answer a fool according to his folly.

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George Bernard Shaw

Changeable women are more endurable that monotonous ones; they are sometimes murdered but never deserted.

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George Bernard Shaw

I learned more from the first stupid woman who fell in love with me than ever my brains taught me.

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George Bernard Shaw

Female murderers get sheaves of offers of marriage.

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George Bernard Shaw

The whole world is strewn with snares, traps, gins and pitfalls for the capture of men by women.

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George Bernard Shaw

A man has no business to marry a woman who can't make him miserable. It means she can't make him happy.

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George Bernard Shaw

To be a champion you must live like one.

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George Bernard Shaw

Though I can make my extravaganzas appear credible, I cannot make the truth appear so.

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George Bernard Shaw

New opinions often appear first as jokes and fancies, then as blasphemies and treason, then as questions open to discussion, and finally as established truths.

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George Bernard Shaw

Religion is a great force - the only real motive force in the world; but what you fellows don't understand is that you must get at a man through his own religion and not through yours.

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George Bernard Shaw

I can't talk religion to a man with bodily hunger in his eyes.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nothing makes a man so selfish as work.

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George Bernard Shaw

Man gives every reason for his conduct save one, every excuse for his crimes save one, every plea for his safety save one; and that one is his cowardice

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George Bernard Shaw

Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from history.

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George Bernard Shaw

Consistency is the enemy of enterprise, just as symmetry is the enemy of art.

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George Bernard Shaw

Audacious ribald: your laughter will finish in hideous boredom before morning.

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George Bernard Shaw

The greatest thing in life is to die young - but delay it as long as possible.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is the end of happiness and the beginning of peace.

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George Bernard Shaw

And so, to the end of history, murder shall breed murder, always in the name of right and honor and peace, until the gods are tired of blood and create a race that can understand.

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George Bernard Shaw

When people shake their heads because we are living in a restless age, ask them how they would like to life in a stationary one, and do without change

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George Bernard Shaw

The unconscious self is the real genius. Your breathing goes wrong the moment your conscious self meddles with it.

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George Bernard Shaw

The first prison I ever saw had inscribed on it CEASE TO DO EVIL: LEARN TO DO WELL; but as the inscription was on the outside, the prisoners could not read it.

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George Bernard Shaw

People must not be forced to adopt me as their favourite author, even for their own good.

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George Bernard Shaw

The whole strength of England lies in the fact that the enormous majority of the English people are snobs.

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George Bernard Shaw

Brigham Young lived to become immortal in history as an American Moses by leading his people through the wilderness into an unpromised land.

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George Bernard Shaw

When you loved me I gave you the whole sun and stars to play with. I gave you eternity in a single moment, strength of the mountains in one clasp of your arms, and the volume of all the seas in one impulse...

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George Bernard Shaw

The best bought-up children are those who have seen thier parents as they are. Hypocrisy is not the first duty of a parent.

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George Bernard Shaw

I feel nothing but the accursed happiness I have dreaded all my life long: the happiness that comes as life goes, the happiness of yielding and dreaming instead of resisting and doing, the sweetness of...

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George Bernard Shaw

We are all victims of the violence that animals suffer... their liberation is also our liberation.

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George Bernard Shaw

Whenever you wish to do anything against the law, Cicely, always consult a good solicitor first.

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George Bernard Shaw

I wish to boast that Pygmalion has been an extremely successful play all over Europe and North America as well as at home. It is so intensely and deliberately didactic, and its subject is esteemed so dry,...

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George Bernard Shaw

Perhaps I had better inform my Protestant readers that the famous Dogma of Papal Infallibility is by far the most modest pretension of the kind in existence. Compared with our infallible democracies, our...

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George Bernard Shaw

The medieval doctors of divinity who did not pretend to settle how many angels could dance on the point of a needle cut a very poor figure as far as romantic credulity is concerned beside the modern physicists...

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George Bernard Shaw

In an article on Bunyan lately published in the "Contemporary Review" - the only article on the subject worth reading on the subject I ever saw (yes, thank you, I am familiar with Macaulay's patronizing...

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George Bernard Shaw

Christianity might be a good thing if anyone ever tried it.

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George Bernard Shaw

The British are apt to make merits of their stupidities, and to represent their various incapacities as points of good breeding.

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George Bernard Shaw

What is wrong with the prosaic Englishman is what is wrong with the prosaic men of all countries: stupidity.

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George Bernard Shaw

It's a pity youth is wasted on the young.

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George Bernard Shaw

Liberty is the breath of life to nations.

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George Bernard Shaw

A true artist will let his wife starve, his children go barefoot, his mother drudge for his living at seventy, sooner than work at anything but his art.

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George Bernard Shaw

A nap, my friend, is a brief period of sleep which overtakes superannuated persons when they endeavor to entertain unwelcome visitors or to listen to scientific lectures.

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George Bernard Shaw

I work as my father drank.

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George Bernard Shaw

A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.

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George Bernard Shaw

I choose not to make a graveyard of my body for the rotting corpses of dead animals.

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George Bernard Shaw

War can so easily be gilt with romance and heroism and solemn national duty and patriotism and the like by persons whose superficial literary and oratorical talent covers an abyss of Godforsaken folly.

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George Bernard Shaw

Our way of getting an army able to fight the German army is to declare war on Germany just as if we had such an army, and then trust to the appalling resultant peril and disaster to drive us into wholesale...

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George Bernard Shaw

That is the injustice of a woman's lot. A woman has to bring up her children; and that means to restrain them, to deny them things they want, to set them tasks, to punish them when they do wrong, to do...

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George Bernard Shaw

What use are cartridges in battle? I always carry chocolate instead.

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George Bernard Shaw

Don't think you can frighten me by telling me that I am alone. France is alone. God is alone. And the loneliness of God is His strength.

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George Bernard Shaw

In the right key one can say anything. In the wrong key, nothing: the only delicate part is the establishment of the key.

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George Bernard Shaw

That is the whole secret of successful fighting. Get your enemy at a disadvantage; and never, on any account, fight him on equal terms.

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George Bernard Shaw

A modern gentleman [rich person] is necessarily the enemy of his country. Even in war he does not fight to defend it, but to prevent his power of preying on it from passing to a foreigner.

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George Bernard Shaw

A man's own self is the last person to believe in him, and is harder to cheat than the rest of the world.

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George Bernard Shaw

The only way in which a nation can make itself wealthy and prosperous is by good housekeeping: that is, by providing for its wants in the order of their importance, and allowing no money to be wasted on...

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George Bernard Shaw

The road to ignorance is paved with good editors.

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George Bernard Shaw

If a group of beings from another planet were to land on Earth - beings who considered themselves as superior to you as you feel yourself to be to other animals - would you concede them the rights over...

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George Bernard Shaw

No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office.

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George Bernard Shaw

Great art is never produced for its own sake. It is too difficult to be worth the effort.

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George Bernard Shaw

All the sweetness of religion is conveyed to the world by the hands of storytellers and image-makers. Without their fictions the truths of religion would for the multitude be neither intelligible nor even...

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George Bernard Shaw

Poverty doesn't bring unhappiness; it brings degradation.

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George Bernard Shaw

Experience fails to teach where there is no desire to learn.

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George Bernard Shaw

Every fool believes what his teachers tell him, and calls his credulity science or morality as confidently as his father called it divine revelation.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is not disbelief that is dangerous to our society; it is belief.

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George Bernard Shaw

Literature is like any other trade; you will never sell anything unless you go to the right shop.

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George Bernard Shaw

You must not suppose, because I am a man of letters, that I never tried to earn an honest living.

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George Bernard Shaw

I'm only a beer teetotaler, not a champagne teetotaler; I don't like beer.

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George Bernard Shaw

Alcohol is a very necessary article. It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the morning.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is a woman's business to get married as soon as possible, and a man's to keep unmarried as long as he can.

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George Bernard Shaw

The notion that inspiration is something that happened thousands of years ago, and was then finished and done with. . . the theory that God retired from business at that period and has not been heard from...

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George Bernard Shaw

The moment we face it frankly we are driven to the conclusion that the community has a right to put a price on the right to live in it ... If people are fit to live, let them live under decent human conditions....

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George Bernard Shaw

We should find ourselves committed to killing a great many people whom we now leave living, and to leave living a great many people whom we at present kill. We should have to get rid of all ideas about...

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George Bernard Shaw

A part of eugenic politics would finally land us in an extensive use of the lethal chamber. A great many people would have to be put out of existence simply because it wastes other people's time to look...

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George Bernard Shaw

The notion that persons should be safe from extermination as long as they do not commit willful murder, or levy war against the Crown, or kidnap, or throw vitriol, is not only to limit social responsibility...

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George Bernard Shaw

Being a mother means that your heart is no longer yours; it wanders wherever your children do

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George Bernard Shaw

Perhaps you know some well-off families who do not seem to suffer from their riches. They do not overeat themselves; they find occupations to keep themselves in health; they do not worry about their position;...

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George Bernard Shaw

What is wrong with priests and popes is that instead of being apostles and saints, they are nothing but empirics who say I know instead of I am learning, and pray for credulity and inertia as wise men...

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George Bernard Shaw

The American white relegates the black to the rank of shoeshine boy; and he concludes from this that the black is good for nothing but shining shoes.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you do not write for publication, there is little point in writing at all.

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George Bernard Shaw

I would exchange every painting of Christ for one snapshot.

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George Bernard Shaw

Anarchism is a game at which the police can beat you.

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George Bernard Shaw

Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else.

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George Bernard Shaw

I don't know if there are men on the moon, but if there are they must be using the earth as their lunatic asylum

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George Bernard Shaw

This is my father. Try what you can with him! He won't listen to me, because he remembers what a fool I was when I was a baby.

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George Bernard Shaw

Very nice sort of place, Oxford, I should think, for people that like that sort of place. They teach you to be a gentleman there. In the polytechnic they teach you to be an engineer or such like. See?

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George Bernard Shaw

The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is.

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George Bernard Shaw

A critic is one who leaves no turn unstoned.

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George Bernard Shaw

Life on board a pleasure steamer violates every moral and physical condition of healthy life except fresh air. . . . It is a guzzling, lounging, gambling, dog's life. The only alternative to excitement...

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George Bernard Shaw

Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't!

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George Bernard Shaw

In literature the ambition of the novice is to acquire the literary language; the struggle of the adept is to get rid of it.

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George Bernard Shaw

I try to follow his example, not to imitate him.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you eliminate smoking and gambling, you will be amazed to find that almost all an Englishman's pleasures can be, and mostly are, shared by his dog.

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George Bernard Shaw

The sex relation is not a personal relation. It can be irresistibly desired and rapturously consummated between persons who could not endure one another for a day in any other relation.

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George Bernard Shaw

I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one.

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George Bernard Shaw

Gambling promises the poor what property performs for the rich-something for nothing.

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George Bernard Shaw

Instruction in sex is as important as instruction in food; yet not only are our adolescents not taught the physiology of sex, but never warned that the strongest sexual attraction may exist between persons...

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George Bernard Shaw

The novelties of one generation are only the resuscitated fashions of the generation before last.

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George Bernard Shaw

Doing what needs to be done may not make you happy, but it will make you great.

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George Bernard Shaw

What is both surprising and delightful is that the spectators are allowed, and even expected, to join in the vocal part of the game...There is no reason why the field should not try to put the batsman...

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George Bernard Shaw

Imitation is not just the sincerest form of flattery - it's the sincerest form of learning.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nobody could stand an eternity of Heaven.

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George Bernard Shaw

Some people look at the world and say 'why?' Some people look at the world and say 'why not?'

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George Bernard Shaw

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.

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George Bernard Shaw

A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.

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George Bernard Shaw

Beware of false knowledge; it is more dangerous than ignorance.

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George Bernard Shaw

I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Just do what must be done. This may not be happiness, but it is greatness.

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George Bernard Shaw

We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.

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George Bernard Shaw

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.

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George Bernard Shaw

Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.

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George Bernard Shaw

We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future.

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George Bernard Shaw

Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.

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George Bernard Shaw

First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity.

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George Bernard Shaw

A happy family is but an earlier heaven.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.

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George Bernard Shaw

The liar's punishment is not in the least that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.

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George Bernard Shaw

If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience.

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George Bernard Shaw

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

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George Bernard Shaw

Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.

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George Bernard Shaw

No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says: He is always convinced that it says what he means.

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George Bernard Shaw

A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.

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George Bernard Shaw

Clever and attractive women do not want to vote; they are willing to let men govern as long as they govern men.

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George Bernard Shaw

Success does not consist in never making mistakes but in never making the same one a second time.

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George Bernard Shaw

Do not waste your time on Social Questions. What is the matter with the poor is Poverty; what is the matter with the rich is Uselessness.

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George Bernard Shaw

Without art, the crudeness of reality would make the world unbearable.

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George Bernard Shaw

Use your health, even to the point of wearing it out. That is what it is for. Spend all you have before you die; do not outlive yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

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George Bernard Shaw

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

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George Bernard Shaw

The golden rule is that there are no golden rules.

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George Bernard Shaw

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.

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George Bernard Shaw

If women were particular about men's characters, they would never get married at all.

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George Bernard Shaw

A gentleman is one who puts more into the world than he takes out.

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George Bernard Shaw

Choose silence of all virtues, for by it you hear other men's imperfections, and conceal your own.

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George Bernard Shaw

Take care to get what you like or you will be forced to like what you get.

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George Bernard Shaw

Science never solves a problem without creating ten more.

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George Bernard Shaw

Animals are my friends... and I don't eat my friends.

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George Bernard Shaw

Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.

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George Bernard Shaw

The only service a friend can really render is to keep up your courage by holding up to you a mirror in which you can see a noble image of yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

Some look at things that are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not?

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George Bernard Shaw

It is a curious sensation: the sort of pain that goes mercifully beyond our powers of feeling. When your heart is broken, your boats are burned: nothing matters any more. It is the end of happiness and...

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George Bernard Shaw

The moment we want to believe something, we suddenly see all the arguments for it, and become blind to the arguments against it.

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George Bernard Shaw

The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity.

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George Bernard Shaw

Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world.

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George Bernard Shaw

I am afraid we must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy.

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George Bernard Shaw

Independence? That's middle class blasphemy. We are all dependent on one another, every soul of us on earth.

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George Bernard Shaw

Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?

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George Bernard Shaw

Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough.

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George Bernard Shaw

Silence is the most perfect expression of scorn.

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George Bernard Shaw

Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few.

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George Bernard Shaw

When I was young, I observed that nine out of ten things I did were failures. So I did ten times more work.

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George Bernard Shaw

A broken heart is a very pleasant complaint for a man in London if he has a comfortable income.

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George Bernard Shaw

In a battle all you need to make you fight is a little hot blood and the knowledge that it's more dangerous to lose than to win.

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George Bernard Shaw

The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

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George Bernard Shaw

The best place to find God is in a garden. You can dig for him there.

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George Bernard Shaw

The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.

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George Bernard Shaw

An election is a moral horror, as bad as a battle except for the blood; a mud bath for every soul concerned in it.

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George Bernard Shaw

I never resist temptation, because I have found that things that are bad for me do not tempt me.

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George Bernard Shaw

Socialism is the same as Communism, only better English.

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George Bernard Shaw

The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they can't find them, make them.

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George Bernard Shaw

Beware of the man who does not return your blow: he neither forgives you nor allows you to forgive yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

The test of a man or woman's breeding is how they behave in a quarrel.

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George Bernard Shaw

If all the economists were laid end to end, they'd never reach a conclusion.

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George Bernard Shaw

All great truths begin as blasphemies.

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George Bernard Shaw

When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.

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George Bernard Shaw

The secret to success is to offend the greatest number of people.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you must hold yourself up to your children as an object lesson, hold yourself up as a warning and not as an example.

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George Bernard Shaw

Power does not corrupt men; fools, however, if they get into a position of power, corrupt power.

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George Bernard Shaw

An asylum for the sane would be empty in America.

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George Bernard Shaw

A man of great common sense and good taste - meaning thereby a man without originality or moral courage.

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George Bernard Shaw

Never fret for an only son, the idea of failure will never occur to him.

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George Bernard Shaw

I'm an atheist and I thank God for it.

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George Bernard Shaw

You use a glass mirror to see your face; you use works of art to see your soul.

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George Bernard Shaw

Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it.

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George Bernard Shaw

A day's work is a day's work, neither more nor less, and the man or woman who does it needs a day's sustenance, a night's repose and due leisure, whether they be painter or ploughman.

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George Bernard Shaw

Parentage is a very important profession, but no test of fitness for it is ever imposed in the interest of the children.

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George Bernard Shaw

The only way to avoid being miserable is not to have enough leisure to wonder whether you are happy or not.

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George Bernard Shaw

Find enough clever things to say, and you're a Prime Minister; write them down and you're a Shakespeare.

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George Bernard Shaw

Capitalism has destroyed our belief in any effective power but that of self interest backed by force.

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George Bernard Shaw

Few people think more than two or three times a year; I have made an international reputation for myself by thinking once or twice a week.

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George Bernard Shaw

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not.

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George Bernard Shaw

Statistics show that of those who contract the habit of eating, very few survive.

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George Bernard Shaw

Every man over forty is a scoundrel.

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George Bernard Shaw

Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine and at last you create what you will.

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George Bernard Shaw

When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport; when a tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity.

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George Bernard Shaw

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it.

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George Bernard Shaw

No man who is occupied in doing a very difficult thing, and doing it very well, ever loses his self-respect.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you leave the smallest corner of your head vacant for a moment, other people's opinions will rush in from all quarters.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is the mark of a truly intelligent person to be moved by statistics.

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George Bernard Shaw

Perhaps the greatest social service that can be rendered by anybody to the country and to mankind is to bring up a family.

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George Bernard Shaw

A fashion is nothing but an induced epidemic.

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George Bernard Shaw

A little learning is a dangerous thing, but we must take that risk because a little is as much as our biggest heads can hold.

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George Bernard Shaw

I never thought much of the courage of a lion tamer. Inside the cage he is at least safe from people.

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George Bernard Shaw

When God created man and woman, he did not take a patent. That's why any imbecile has been able to do so ever since.

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George Bernard Shaw

Censorship ends in logical completeness when nobody is allowed to read any books except the books that nobody reads.

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George Bernard Shaw

Kings are not born: they are made by artificial hallucination.

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George Bernard Shaw

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.

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George Bernard Shaw

Miracles, in the sense of phenomena we cannot explain, surround us on every hand: life itself is the miracle of miracles.

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George Bernard Shaw

Only on paper has humanity yet achieved glory, beauty, truth, knowledge, virtue, and abiding love.

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George Bernard Shaw

England and America are two countries separated by the same language.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nothing is worth doing unless the consequences may be serious.

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George Bernard Shaw

Political necessities sometime turn out to be political mistakes.

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George Bernard Shaw

The man with a toothache thinks everyone happy whose teeth are sound. The poverty-stricken man makes the same mistake about the rich man.

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George Bernard Shaw

We should all be obliged to appear before a board every five years and justify our existence... on pain of liquidation.

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George Bernard Shaw

Cruelty would be delicious if one could only find some sort of cruelty that didn't really hurt.

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George Bernard Shaw

I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake.

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George Bernard Shaw

The only secrets are the secrets that keep themselves.

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George Bernard Shaw

We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.

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George Bernard Shaw

I am a Christian. That obliges me to be a Communist.

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George Bernard Shaw

The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one.

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George Bernard Shaw

Baseball has the great advantage over cricket of being sooner ended.

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George Bernard Shaw

Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of opportunity.

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George Bernard Shaw

Reading made Don Quixote a gentleman, but believing what he read made him mad.

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George Bernard Shaw

The first condition of progress is the removal of censorship.

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George Bernard Shaw

One man that has a mind and knows it can always beat ten men who haven't and don't.

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George Bernard Shaw

The possibilities are numerous once we decide to act and not react.

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George Bernard Shaw

I dislike feeling at home when I am abroad.

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George Bernard Shaw

The great advantage of a hotel is that it is a refuge from home life.

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George Bernard Shaw

I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would be an affront to your intelligence.

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George Bernard Shaw

Most people do not pray; they only beg.

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George Bernard Shaw

Which painting in the National Gallery would I save if there was a fire? The one nearest the door of course.

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George Bernard Shaw

You cannot be a hero without being a coward.

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George Bernard Shaw

A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell.

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George Bernard Shaw

In heaven an angel is nobody in particular.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.

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George Bernard Shaw

All censorships exist to prevent anyone from challenging current conceptions and existing institutions.

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George Bernard Shaw

He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches.

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George Bernard Shaw

It's so hard to know what to do when one wishes earnestly to do right.

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George Bernard Shaw

There is nothing more dangerous than the conscience of a bigot.

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George Bernard Shaw

Old men are dangerous: it doesn't matter to them what is going to happen to the world.

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George Bernard Shaw

There are no secrets better kept than the secrets everybody guesses.

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George Bernard Shaw

All my life affection has been showered upon me, and every forward step I have made has been taken in spite of it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Human beings are the only animals of which I am thoroughly and cravenly afraid.

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George Bernard Shaw

The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me.

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George Bernard Shaw

Home life is no more natural to us than a cage is natural to a cockatoo.

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George Bernard Shaw

Do not try to live forever. You will not succeed.

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George Bernard Shaw

I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation.

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George Bernard Shaw

A man never tells you anything until you contradict him.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is most unwise for people in love to marry.

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George Bernard Shaw

Better never than late.

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George Bernard Shaw

Peace is not only better than war, but infinitely more arduous.

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George Bernard Shaw

What a man believes may be ascertained, not from his creed, but from the assumptions on which he habitually acts.

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George Bernard Shaw

I have to live for others and not for myself: that's middle-class morality.

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George Bernard Shaw

Assassination is the extreme form of censorship.

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George Bernard Shaw

You'll never have a quiet world till you knock the patriotism out of the human race.

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George Bernard Shaw

I enjoy convalescence. It is the part that makes the illness worth while.

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George Bernard Shaw

I want to be all used up when I die.

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George Bernard Shaw

What we want is to see the child in pursuit of knowledge, and not knowledge in pursuit of the child.

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George Bernard Shaw

In this world there is always danger for those who are afraid of it.

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George Bernard Shaw

No question is so difficult to answer as that to which the answer is obvious.

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George Bernard Shaw

Property is organized robbery.

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George Bernard Shaw

Virtue consists, not in abstaining from vice, but in not desiring it.

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George Bernard Shaw

An Englishman thinks he is moral when he is only uncomfortable.

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George Bernard Shaw

Self-sacrifice enables us to sacrifice other people without blushing.

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George Bernard Shaw

Until the men of action clear out the talkers we who have social consciences are at the mercy of those who have none.

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George Bernard Shaw

When a man says money can do anything, that settles it: he hasn't got any.

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George Bernard Shaw

While we ourselves are the living graves of murdered animals, how can we expect any ideal living conditions on this earth?

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George Bernard Shaw

My reputation grows with every failure.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nothing is ever done in this world until men are prepared to kill one another if it is not done.

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George Bernard Shaw

Americans adore me and will go on adoring me until I say something nice about them.

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George Bernard Shaw

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does.

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George Bernard Shaw

Those who do not know how to live must make a merit of dying.

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George Bernard Shaw

Life levels all men. Death reveals the eminent.

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George Bernard Shaw

Marriage is good enough for the lower classes: they have facilities for desertion that are denied to us.

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George Bernard Shaw

A veteran journalist has never had time to think twice before he writes.

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George Bernard Shaw

The frontier between hell and heaven is only the difference between two ways of looking at things.

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George Bernard Shaw

Very few people can afford to be poor.

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George Bernard Shaw

We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.

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George Bernard Shaw

Man can climb to the highest summits, but he cannot dwell there long.

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George Bernard Shaw

The art of government is the organisation of idolatry.

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George Bernard Shaw

The faults of the burglar are the qualities of the financier.

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George Bernard Shaw

The love of economy is the root of all virtue.

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George Bernard Shaw

A man who has no office to go, to I don't care who he is, is a trial of which you can have no conception.

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George Bernard Shaw

Few of us have vitality enough to make any of our instincts imperious.

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George Bernard Shaw

It's easier to replace a dead man than a good picture.

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George Bernard Shaw

Men are wise in proportion, not to their experience, but to their capacity for experience.

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George Bernard Shaw

Men have to do some awfully mean things to keep up their respectability.

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George Bernard Shaw

People become attached to their burdens sometimes more than the burdens are attached to them.

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George Bernard Shaw

The British soldier can stand up to anything except the British War Office.

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George Bernard Shaw

The man who writes about himself and his own time is the only man who writes about all people and about all time.

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George Bernard Shaw

The truth is, hardly any of us have ethical energy enough for more than one really inflexible point of honor.

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George Bernard Shaw

There is no satisfaction in hanging a man who does not object to it.

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George Bernard Shaw

There is no subject on which more dangerous nonsense is talked and thought than marriage.

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George Bernard Shaw

Virtue is insufficient temptation.

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George Bernard Shaw

What Englishman will give his mind to politics as long as he can afford to keep a motor car?

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George Bernard Shaw

You are going to let the fear of poverty govern you life and your reward will be that you will eat, but you will not live.

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George Bernard Shaw

Every person who has mastered a profession is a skeptic concerning it.

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George Bernard Shaw

General consultant to mankind.

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George Bernard Shaw

Syllables govern the world.

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George Bernard Shaw

The heretic is always better dead. And mortal eyes cannot distinguish the saint from the heretic.

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George Bernard Shaw

The natural term of the affection of the human animal for its offspring is six years.

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George Bernard Shaw

What is virtue but the Trade Unionism of the married?

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George Bernard Shaw

Why, except as a means of livelihood, a man should desire to act on the stage when he has the whole world to act in, is not clear to me.

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George Bernard Shaw

You have learnt something. That always feels at first as if you had lost something.

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George Bernard Shaw

You can always tell an old soldier by the inside of his holsters and cartridge boxes. The young ones carry pistols and cartridges; the old ones, grub.

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George Bernard Shaw

Principles without programs are platitudes.

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George Bernard Shaw

Grain by grain, a loaf. Stone upon stone, a palace.

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George Bernard Shaw

I like flowers, I also like children, but I do not chop their heads off and keep them in bowls of water around the house.

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George Bernard Shaw

The best reformers the world has ever seen are those who commence on themselves.

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George Bernard Shaw

Besides, do any of us understand what we are doing? If we did, would we ever do it?

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George Bernard Shaw

Reformers have the idea that change can be achieved by brute sanity.

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George Bernard Shaw

Lack of money is the root of of all evil.

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George Bernard Shaw

Trade unionism is not socialism. It is the capitalism of the proletariat.

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George Bernard Shaw

Wicked people means people who have no love: therefore, they have no shame. They have the power to ask love because the don't need it: they have the power to offer it because they have none to give.

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George Bernard Shaw

Oh, well, if you want original conversations, you'd better go and talk to yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

Capitalism drives the employers to do their worst to the employed, and the employed to do the least for them. And it boasts all the time of the incentive it provides to both to do their best! . . . The...

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George Bernard Shaw

There is no accomplishment so easy to acquire as politeness and none more profitable.

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George Bernard Shaw

Both optimists and pessimists contribute to society. The optimist invents the aeroplane, the pessimist the parachute.

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George Bernard Shaw

Never waste jealousy on a real man: it is the imaginary man that supplants us all in the long run.

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George Bernard Shaw

The real pleasure of one's life is the devotion to a great objective of one's consideration.

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George Bernard Shaw

I do not know what I think until I write it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Do you think that the things people make fools of themselves about are any less real and true than the things they behave sensibly about? They are more true: they are the only things that are true.

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George Bernard Shaw

Home is the girl's prison and the woman's workhouse.

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George Bernard Shaw

A man who loses his money gains, at the least, experience, and sometimes, something better.

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George Bernard Shaw

We call the one side [of humanity] religion, and we call the other science. Religion is always right. ... Science is always wrong; it is the very artifice of men. Science can never solve one problem without...

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George Bernard Shaw

From a very early age, I've had to interrupt my education to go to school.

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George Bernard Shaw

Opera is when a tenor and soprano want to make love, but are prevented from doing so by a baritone.

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George Bernard Shaw

Heaven, as conventionally conceived, is a place so inane, so dull, so useless, so miserable that nobody has ever ventured to describe a whole day in heaven, though plenty of people have described a day...

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George Bernard Shaw

Put an Irishman on the spit and you can always get another Irishman to turn him.

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George Bernard Shaw

People expect too much of one year and too little of ten.

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George Bernard Shaw

After studying the Hungarian language for years, I can confidently conclude that had Hungarian been my mother tongue, it would have been more precious. Simply because through this extraordinary, ancient...

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George Bernard Shaw

Man is unique in that he has plans, purpose and goals which require the need for criteria of choice. The need for ethical value is within man whose future may largely be determined by the choice he make

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George Bernard Shaw

All dress is fancy dress, is it not, except our natural skins?

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George Bernard Shaw

I was a cannibal for twenty-five years. For the rest I have been a vegetarian.

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George Bernard Shaw

The 100% American is 99% idiot.

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George Bernard Shaw

The great secret...is not having bad manners or good manners...but having the same manner for all human souls.

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George Bernard Shaw

I like a state of continual becoming, with a goal in front and not behind.

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George Bernard Shaw

Men get tired of everything, of heaven no less than of hell; and that all history is nothing but a record of the oscillations of the world between these two extremes. An epoch is but a swing of the pendulum;...

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George Bernard Shaw

To be in hell is to drift; to be in heaven is to steer.

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George Bernard Shaw

I was convinced that Ceylon is the cradle of the human race because everyone there looks an original.

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George Bernard Shaw

No man manages his affairs as well as a tree does

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George Bernard Shaw

There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.

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George Bernard Shaw

The apparent multiplication of gods is bewildering at the first glance, but you soon discover that they are the same GOD. There is always one uttermost God who defies personification. This makes Hinduism...

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George Bernard Shaw

The Indian way of life provides the vision of the natural, real way of life. We veil ourselves with unnatural masks. On the face of India are the tender expressions which carry the mark of the Creators...

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George Bernard Shaw

Violence is the repartee of the illiterate.

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George Bernard Shaw

There are only two classes in good society in England: the equestrian classes and the neurotic classes.

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George Bernard Shaw

All young women begin by believing they can change and reform the men they marry. They can't.

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George Bernard Shaw

You cannot have power for good without having power for evil too. Even mother's milk nourishes murderers as well as heroes.

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George Bernard Shaw

There is, on the whole, nothing on earth intended for innocent people so horrible as a school. To begin with, it is a prison. But in some respects more cruel than a prison. In a prison, for instance, you...

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George Bernard Shaw

The secret of being miserable is to have leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not. The cure for it is occupation, because occupation means pre-occupation; and the pre-occupied person is neither...

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George Bernard Shaw

What is the matter with universities is that the students are school children, whereas it is of the very essence of university education that they should be adults.

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George Bernard Shaw

We cut the throat of a calf and hang it up by the heels to bleed to death so that our veal cutlet may be white; we nail geese to a board and cram them with food because we like the taste of liver disease;...

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George Bernard Shaw

Being hurt by someone you truly care about leaves a hole in you heart that only love can fill.

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George Bernard Shaw

I believe in the discipline of silence, and could talk for hours about it.

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George Bernard Shaw

When the world goes mad, one must accept madness as sanity; since sanity is, in the last analysis, nothing but the madness on which the whole world happens to agree.

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George Bernard Shaw

I tell you that as long as I can conceive something better than myself I cannot be easy unless I am striving to bring it into existence or clearing the way for it.

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George Bernard Shaw

I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live, it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can.

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George Bernard Shaw

I become more convinced that beings from other planets are using the Earth as a lunatic asylum

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George Bernard Shaw

Success covers a multitude of blunders.

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George Bernard Shaw

A mind of the caliber of mine cannot derive its nutrient from cows.

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George Bernard Shaw

Islam is the best religion and Muslims are the worst followers

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George Bernard Shaw

How can what an Englishman believes be hearsay? It is a contradiction in terms.

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George Bernard Shaw

The most anxious man in a prison is the governor.

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George Bernard Shaw

Here there is no hope, and consequently no duty, no work, nothing to be gained by praying, nothing to be lost by doing what you like. Hell, in short, is a place where you have nothing to do but amuse yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you strike a child, take care that you strike it in anger, even at the risk of maiming it for life. A blow in cold blood neither can nor should be forgiven.

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George Bernard Shaw

Englishmen hate Liberty and Equality too much to understand them. But every Englishman loves a pedigree.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is clear that a novel cannot be too bad to be worth publishing. . . . It certainly is possible for a novel to be too good to be worth publishing.

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George Bernard Shaw

You don't expect me to know what to say about a play when I don't know who the author is, do you? . . . If it's by a good author, it's a good play, naturally. That stands to reason.

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George Bernard Shaw

We educate one another; and we cannot do this if half of us consider the other half not good enough to talk to.

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George Bernard Shaw

The philosopher is Nature's pilot. And there you have our difference: to be in hell is to drift: to be in heaven is to steer.

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George Bernard Shaw

Life contains but two tragedies. One is not to get your heart's desire; the other is to get it.

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George Bernard Shaw

All classes in proportion to their lack of travel and familiarity with foreign literature are bellicose, prejudiced against foreigners, fond of fighting as a cruel sport - in short, dog-like in their notions...

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George Bernard Shaw

When Satan makes impure verses, Allah sends a divine tune to cleanse them.

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George Bernard Shaw

Men trifle with their business and their politics but never trifle with their games. It brings truth home to them. They cannot pretend they have won when they have lost nor that they had a magnificent...

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George Bernard Shaw

The only way for a woman to provide for herself decently is for her to be good to some man that can afford to be good to her.

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George Bernard Shaw

The Jews generally give value. They make you pay; but they deliver the goods. In my experience the men who want something for nothing are invariably Christians.

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George Bernard Shaw

When it comes to the point, really bad men are just as rare as really good ones.

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George Bernard Shaw

Suppose the world were only one of God's jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one?

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George Bernard Shaw

In order to fully realize how bad a popular play can be, it is necessary to see it twice.

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George Bernard Shaw

There is nothing on earth intended for innocent people so horrible as a school.

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George Bernard Shaw

Don't order any black things. Rejoice in his memory; and be radiant: leave grief to the children. Wear violet and purple. Be patient with the poor people who will snivel: they don't know; and they think...

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George Bernard Shaw

Disobedience, the rarest and most courageous of the virtues, is seldom distinguished from neglect, the laziest and commonest of the vices.

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George Bernard Shaw

In your dread of dictators you established a state of society in which every ward boss is a dictator, every private employer a dictator, every financier a dictator, all with the livelihood of the workers...

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George Bernard Shaw

Life at its noblest leaves mere happiness far behind; and indeed cannot endure it. Happiness is not the object of life: life has no object: it is an end in itself; and courage consists in the readiness...

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George Bernard Shaw

I talk democracy to these men and women. I tell them that they have the vote, and that theirs is the kingdom and the power and the glory. I say to them You are supreme: exercise your power. They say, That's...

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George Bernard Shaw

Has fear ever held a man back from anything he really wanted?

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George Bernard Shaw

If you can’t appreciate what you’ve got, you’d better get what you can appreciate.

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George Bernard Shaw

My father must have had some elementary education for he could read and write and keep accounts inaccurately

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George Bernard Shaw

A man learns to skate by staggering about and making a fool of himself. Indeed he progresses in all things by resolutely making a fool of himself.

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George Bernard Shaw

Schools and schoolmasters, as we have them today, are not popular as places of education and teachers, but rather prisons and turnkeys in which children are kept to prevent them disturbing and chaperoning...

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George Bernard Shaw

Perhaps the greatest social service that can be rendered by anybody to the country and to mankind is to bring up a family. But here again, because there is nothing to sell, there is a very general disposition...

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George Bernard Shaw

Man is the only animal of which I am thoroughly and cravenly afraid...There is no harm in a well-fed lion. It has no ideals, no sect, no party...

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George Bernard Shaw

You will think less of the art, when you know the artist

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George Bernard Shaw

There may be some doubt as to who are the best people to have charge of children, but there can be no doubt that parents are the worst.

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George Bernard Shaw

No sooner had Jesus knocked over the dragon of superstition than Paul boldly set it on its legs again in the name of Jesus.

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George Bernard Shaw

What's the use of money if you have to earn it.

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George Bernard Shaw

All progress depends on the unreasonable man.

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George Bernard Shaw

Gardening is the only unquestionably useful job.

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George Bernard Shaw

My rank is the highest known in Switzerland: I'm a free citizen.

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George Bernard Shaw

I'm not a teacher: only a fellow traveler of whom you asked the way. I pointed ahead - ahead of myself as well as you.

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George Bernard Shaw

Vulgarity in a king flatters the majority of the nation.

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George Bernard Shaw

Though justice be Thy plea, consider this: That in the course of justice none of us should see salvation. We do pray for mercy, And that same prayer doth teach us all to render The deeds of mercy.

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George Bernard Shaw

Money is indeed the most important thing in the world; and all sound and successful personal and national morality should have this fact for its basis.

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George Bernard Shaw

Money is the most important thing in the world. It represents health, strength, honor, generosity, and beauty as conspicuously as the want of it represents illness, weakness, disgrace, meanness, and ugliness.

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George Bernard Shaw

Our necessities are few, but our wants are endless.

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George Bernard Shaw

Let not the right side of your brain know what the left side doeth.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you go to Heaven without being naturally qualified for it you will not enjoy yourself there.

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George Bernard Shaw

Those who can’t change their minds can’t change anything.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is a noteworthy fact that kicking and beating have played so considerable a part in the habits which necessity has imposed on mankind in past ages that the only way of preventing civilized men from...

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George Bernard Shaw

The only time my education was interrupted was when I was in school.

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George Bernard Shaw

Money enables us to get what we want instead of what other people think we want.

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George Bernard Shaw

If a woman rebels against high-heeled shoes, she should take care to do it in a very smart hat

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George Bernard Shaw

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller.

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George Bernard Shaw

Every man to whom salvation is offered has an inalienable natural right to say 'No, thank you: I prefer to retain my full moral responsibility: it is not good for me to be able to load a scapegoat with...

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George Bernard Shaw

Golf is typical capitalist luncay.

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George Bernard Shaw

A newspaper, not having to act on its descriptions and reports, but only to sell them to idly curious people, has nothing but honor to lose by inaccuracy and non-veracity.

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George Bernard Shaw

I like a bit of mongrel myself, whether it's a man or a dog.

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George Bernard Shaw

Who are those we love? Only those we do not hate.

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George Bernard Shaw

Tradition will accustom people to any atrocity

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George Bernard Shaw

Leisure may be defined as free activity, labor as compulsory activity. Leisure does what it likes, labor does what it must, the compulsion being that of Nature, which in these latitudes leaves men no...

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George Bernard Shaw

The joy in life is to be used for a purpose. I want to be used up when I die.

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George Bernard Shaw

We live in an atmosphere of shame. We are ashamed of everything that is real about us; ashamed of ourselves, of our relatives, of our incomes, of our accents, of our opinions, of our experience, just...

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George Bernard Shaw

There is nothing that can be changed more completely than human nature when the job is taken in hand early enough.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you take too long in deciding what to do with your life, you'll find you've done it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Heartbreak is life educating us.

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George Bernard Shaw

When we want to read of the deeds that are done for love, whither do we turn? To the murder column.

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George Bernard Shaw

I have always held the religion of Muhammad in high estimation because of its wonderful vitality. It is the only religion which appears to me to possess that assimilating capacity to the changing phase...

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George Bernard Shaw

I believe that if a man like him were to assume the dictatorship of the modern world he would succeed in solving its problems in a way that would bring it the much needed peace and happiness: I have prophesied...

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George Bernard Shaw

If you lived in London, where the whole system is one of false good-fellowship, and you may know a man for twenty years without finding out that he hates you like poison, you would soon have your eyes...

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George Bernard Shaw

The greatest of evils and the worst of crimes is poverty.

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George Bernard Shaw

Security, the chief pretense of civilization, cannot exist where the worst of dangers, the danger of poverty, hangs over everyone's head.

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George Bernard Shaw

The greatest evils and the worst of crimes is poverty; our first duty, a duty to which every other consideration should be sacrificed, is not to be poor.

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George Bernard Shaw

The seven deadly sins... food, clothing, firing, rent, taxes, respectability and children. Nothing can lift those seven millstones from Man's neck but money; and the spirit cannot soar until the millstones...

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George Bernard Shaw

Poverty blights whole cities; spreads horrible pestilences; strikes dead the very souls of all who come within sight, sound, or smell of it

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George Bernard Shaw

All progress depends upon the unreasonable person.

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George Bernard Shaw

I'm sick of all the reasonable people: they see all the reasons for doing nothing

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George Bernard Shaw

If parents would only realize how they bore their children.

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George Bernard Shaw

Every doctor will allow a colleague to decimate a whole countryside sooner than violate the bond of professional etiquette by giving him away.

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George Bernard Shaw

As well consult a butcher on the value of vegetarianism as a doctor on the worth of vaccination.

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George Bernard Shaw

During the last considerable epidemic at the turn of the century, I was a member of the Health Committee of London Borough Council, and I learned how the credit of vaccination is kept up statistically...

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George Bernard Shaw

At present, intelligent people do not have their children vaccinated, nor does the law now compel them to. The result is not, as the Jennerians prophesied, the extermination of the human race by smallpox;...

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George Bernard Shaw

All evolution in thought and conduct must at first appear as heresy and misconduct.

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George Bernard Shaw

If you injure your neighbour, better not do it by halves.

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George Bernard Shaw

Death is for many of us the gate of hell; but we are inside on the way out, not outside on the way in.

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George Bernard Shaw

My own education has been entirely controversial: that is why I know what I am writing about; and appear eccentric to dogmatically educated Old School Ties whose heads are stuffed with obsolete shibboleths.

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George Bernard Shaw

Manners are more important than laws and upon them, to a great deal, the law depends....

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George Bernard Shaw

Any man who is not a communist at the age of twenty is a fool. Any man who is still a communist at the age of thirty is an even bigger fool.

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George Bernard Shaw

God is on the side of the big battalions.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is impossible for an Englishman to open his mouth without making some other Englishman hate or despise him.

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George Bernard Shaw

An American has no sense of privacy. He does not know what it means.There is no such thing in the country.

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George Bernard Shaw

We don't bother much about dress and manners in England, because as a nation we don't dress well and we've no manners.

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George Bernard Shaw

What, or who, led you to take up photography, and about what date ? George Bernard Shaw – I always wanted to draw and paint. I had no literary ambition. I aspired to be a Michelangelo, not a Shakespeare....

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George Bernard Shaw

I appeal to the chemists to discover a humane gas that will kill instantly and painlessly. In short- a gentlemanly gas deadly by all means, but humane, not cruel.

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George Bernard Shaw

The moment we face it frankly we are driven to the conclusion that the community has a right to put a price on the right to live in it

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George Bernard Shaw

A doctor's reputation is made by the number of eminent men who die under his care.

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George Bernard Shaw

Beware of the man whose God is in the skies.

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George Bernard Shaw

A man ought to be able to be fond of his wife without making a fool of himself about her.

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George Bernard Shaw

Emotional excitement reaches men through tea, tobacco, opium, whisky, and religion.

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George Bernard Shaw

Remember that I too am mortal.

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George Bernard Shaw

What we are confronted with now is a growing perception that if we desire a certain type of civilization and culture we must exterminate the sort of people who do not fit into it,

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George Bernard Shaw

You can easily find people who are ten times as rich at sixty as they were at twenty but not one of them will tell you that they are ten times as happy

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George Bernard Shaw

A genius is a person who is seeing further and probing deeper than other people has a different set of ethical valuations from their and has energy enough to give effect to this extra vision and its valuations...

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George Bernard Shaw

The world is populated in the main by people who should not exist

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George Bernard Shaw

People exaggerate the value of things they haven't got everybody worships truth and unselfishness because they have no experience with them

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George Bernard Shaw

There are scores of thousands of human insects who are ready at a moment's notice to reveal the Will of God on every possible subject

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George Bernard Shaw

The real Brahms is nothing more than a sentimental voluptuary. rather tiresomely addicted to dressing himself up as Handel or Beethoven and making a prolonged and intolerable noise.

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George Bernard Shaw

What a man is depends on his character; but what he does, and what we think of what he does, depends on his circumstances.

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George Bernard Shaw

Self-denial is not a virtue; it is only the effect of prudence on rascality.

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George Bernard Shaw

The worst cliques are those which consist of one man.

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George Bernard Shaw

Fashions, after all, are only induced epidemics.

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George Bernard Shaw

Democracy is a word all public men use and none understand.

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George Bernard Shaw

Must then a Christ perish in torment in every age to save those that have no imagination.

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George Bernard Shaw

The best way to get your point across is to entertain.

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George Bernard Shaw

What really flatters a man is that you think him worth flattering.

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George Bernard Shaw

The right to know is like the right to live. It is fundamental and unconditional in its assumption that knowledge, like life, is a desirable thing.

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George Bernard Shaw

If I bind the future I bind my will. If I bind my will I strangle creation.

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George Bernard Shaw

Only Lawyers and mental defectives are automatically exempt for jury duty.

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George Bernard Shaw

Life is a disease; and the only difference between on man and another is the stage of the disease at which he lives.

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George Bernard Shaw

Dancing is a very crude attempt to get into the rhythm of life.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nature holds no brief for the human experiment; it must stand or fall by its results.

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George Bernard Shaw

Go anywhere in England where there are natural wholesome, contented and really nice English people; and what do you find? That the stables are the real centre of the household.

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George Bernard Shaw

Reminiscences make one feel so deliciously aged and sad.

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George Bernard Shaw

Money is the counter that enables life to be lived socially; it is life as truly as sovereigns and banknotes are money.

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George Bernard Shaw

Revolutions have never lightened the burden of tyranny; they have only shifted it to another shoulder.

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George Bernard Shaw

Every step of progress means a duty repudiated, and a scripture torn up.

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George Bernard Shaw

All progress means war with society.

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George Bernard Shaw

Make it a rule never to give a child a book you would not read yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is not that I am so clever; it is that everyone else is so stupid.

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George Bernard Shaw

Where there is no religion, hypocrisy becomes good taste.

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George Bernard Shaw

Women upset everything. When you let them into your life, you find that the woman is driving at one thing and you're driving at another.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nothing remains beautiful and interesting except thought, because the thought is the life.

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George Bernard Shaw

Gentle Jesus, meek and mild' is a snivelling modern invention, with no warrant in the gospels.

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George Bernard Shaw

When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and...

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George Bernard Shaw

People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances.

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George Bernard Shaw

A lifetime of happiness! No man alive could bear it: it would be hell on earth.

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George Bernard Shaw

I assume that to prevent illness in later life, you should never have been born at all.

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George Bernard Shaw

She has mischievious moments in when she wishes she could get him alone on a desert island...

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George Bernard Shaw

I've posed nude for a photographer in the manner of Rodin's Thinker, but I merely looked constipated.

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George Bernard Shaw

The thought of two thousand people crunching celery at the same time horrified me.

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George Bernard Shaw

I sold flowers. I didn't sell myself. Now you've made a lady of me I'm not fit to sell anything else.

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George Bernard Shaw

I finished my first book seventy-six years ago. I offered it to every publisher on the English-speaking earth I had ever heard of. Their refusals were unanimous: and it did not get into print until, fifty...

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George Bernard Shaw

Decency cannot be discussed without indecency!

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George Bernard Shaw

Forgive him, for he believes that the customs of his tribe are the laws of nature!

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George Bernard Shaw

Every Englishman believes that Handel now occupies an important position in heaven. If so, le bon Dieu must feel toward him very much as Louis Treize felt toward Richelieu.

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George Bernard Shaw

After all, the wrong road always leads somewhere.

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George Bernard Shaw

The longer I live, the more I realize that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time!

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George Bernard Shaw

My main reason for adopting literature as a profession was that, as the author is never seen by his clients, he need not dress respectably.

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George Bernard Shaw

Treat a friend as a person who may someday become your enemy; an enemy as a person who may someday become your friend.

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George Bernard Shaw

I have very carefully studied Islam and the life of its Prophet (PBUH). I have done so both as a student of history and as a critic. And I have come to conclusion that Muhammad (PBUH) was indeed a great...

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George Bernard Shaw

All censorships exist to prevent anyone from challenging current conceptions and existing institutions. All progress is initiated by challenging current conceptions, and executed by supplanting existing...

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George Bernard Shaw

We are sick of war, we don't want to fight, And yet we gorge ourselves upon the dead.

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George Bernard Shaw

My situation is a solemn one: life is offered to me on the condition of eating beefsteaks. But death is better than cannibalism. My will contains directions for my funeral, which will be followed, not...

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George Bernard Shaw

Oh, come! That boot is on the other leg. Why should you call me to account for eating decently? If I battened on the scorched corpses of animals, you might well ask me why I did that

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George Bernard Shaw

A dinner! How horrible! I am to be made the pretext for killing all those wretched animals and birds, and fish! Thank you for nothing. Now if it were to be a fast instead of a feast; say a solemn three...

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George Bernard Shaw

I was told that my diet was so poor that I could not repair the bones that were broken and operated on. So I have just had an Xradiograph taken; and lo! perfectly mended solid bone so beautifully white...

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George Bernard Shaw

I don't. I look my age; and I am my age. It is the other people who look older than they are. What can you expect from people who eat corpses and drink spirits?

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George Bernard Shaw

When a man of normal habits is ill, everyone hastens to assure him that he is going to recover. When a vegetarian is ill (which fortunately very seldom happens), everyone assures him that he is going to...

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George Bernard Shaw

While browsing in a second-hand bookshop one day, George Bernard Shaw was amused to find a copy of one of his own works which he himself had inscribed for a friend: "To ----, with esteem, George Bernard...

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George Bernard Shaw

We are the living graves of murdered beasts, slaughtered to satisfy our appetites. How can we hope in this world to attain the peace we say we are so anxious for?

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George Bernard Shaw

When our relatives are at home, we have to think of all their good points or it would be impossible to endure them.

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George Bernard Shaw

An Englishman does everything on principle: he fights you on patriotic principles; he robs you on business principles; he enslaves you on imperial principles.

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George Bernard Shaw

Englishmen never will be slaves; they are free to do whatever the government and public opinion allow them.

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George Bernard Shaw

This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nothing soothes me more after a long and maddening course of pianoforte recitals than to sit and have my teeth drilled.

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George Bernard Shaw

I am oppressed with a dread of living forever. That is the only disadvantage of vegetarianism.

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George Bernard Shaw

Those who won't hesitate to vivisect, won't hesitate to lie about it as well.

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George Bernard Shaw

We must always think about things, and we must think about things as they are, not as they are said to be.

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George Bernard Shaw

Liquor is the chloroform which enables the poor man to endure the painful operation of living.

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George Bernard Shaw

I knew if I waited around long enough something like this would happen.

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George Bernard Shaw

It is difficult, if not impossible, for most people to think otherwise than in the fashion of their own period.

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George Bernard Shaw

For four wicked centuries the world has dreamed this foolish dream of efficiency; and the end is not yet. But the end will come.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nothing is ever accomplished by a reasonable man.

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George Bernard Shaw

I can forgive Alfred Nobel for having invented dynamite, but only a fiend in human form could have invented the Nobel Prize.

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George Bernard Shaw

Nobel Prize money is a life-belt thrown to a swimmer who has already reached the shore in safety.

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George Bernard Shaw

Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.

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George Bernard Shaw

It's all that the young can do for the old, to shock them and keep them up to date.

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George Bernard Shaw

When the horrors of anarchy force us to set up laws that forbid us to fight and torture one another for sport, we still snatch at every excuse for declaring individuals outside the protection of law and...

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George Bernard Shaw

A man of my spiritual intensity does not eat corpses.

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George Bernard Shaw

I believe in Michelangelo, Velasquez, and Rembrandt; in the might of design, the mystery of color, the redemption of all things by Beauty everlasting, and the message of Art that has made these hands blessed....

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George Bernard Shaw

Newspaper : A device unable to distinguish between a bicycle accident and the collapse of civilisation.

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George Bernard Shaw

If the announcer can produce the impression that he is a gentleman, he may pronounce as he pleases.

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George Bernard Shaw

Poverty does not produce unhappiness: It produces degradation.

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George Bernard Shaw

My friend, when a man has anything to tell in this world, the difficulty is not to make him tell it, but to prevent him from telling it too often.

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George Bernard Shaw

Am reserving two tickets for you for my premiere. Come and bring a friend - if you have one. Telegram inviting Winston Churchill to opening night of Pygmalion. Churchill wired back: Impossible to be present...

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George Bernard Shaw

Self-control is the quality that distinguishes the fittest to survive.

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George Bernard Shaw

Assassination is the extreme form of censorship; and it seems hard to justify an incitement to it on anti-censorial principles.

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George Bernard Shaw

The most tragic thing in the world is a man of genius who is not a man of honor.

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George Bernard Shaw

You have to choose between trusting to the natural stability of gold and the natural stability of the honesty and intelligence of the members of the government. And, with due respect to these gentlemen,...

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George Bernard Shaw

It is said that every people has the Government it deserves. It is more to the point that every Government has the electorate it deserves; for the orator of the front bench can edify or debauch an ignorant...

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George Bernard Shaw

Ladies and gentleman are permitted to have friends in the kennel, but not in the kitchen.

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George Bernard Shaw

Truth telling is not compatible with the defence of the realm.

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George Bernard Shaw

Atrocities are not less atrocities when they occur in laboratories and are called medical research.

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George Bernard Shaw

I do not want to make my stomach a graveyard of dead animals.

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George Bernard Shaw

He never does a proper thing without giving an improper reason for it.

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George Bernard Shaw

People get nothing out of books but what they bring to them.

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George Bernard Shaw

The heart of an Irishman is nothing but his imagination

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George Bernard Shaw

Custom will reconcile people to any atrocity, and fashion will drive them to acquire any custom.

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George Bernard Shaw

The savage bows down to idols of wood and stone, the civilized man to idols of flesh and blood

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George Bernard Shaw

The happiness of credulity is a cheap and dangerous quality.

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George Bernard Shaw

Titles distinguish the mediocre, embarrass the superior, and are disgraced by the inferior.

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George Bernard Shaw

Only in books has mankind known perfect truth, love and beauty.

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George Bernard Shaw

Those who talk most about the blessings of marriage and the constancy of its vows are the very people who declare that if the chain were broken and the prisoners left free to choose, the whole social fabric...

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George Bernard Shaw

As an old soldier, I admit the cowardice: it's as universal as seasickness, and matters just as little.

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George Bernard Shaw

We know there is intention and purpose in the universe, because there is intention and purpose in us.

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George Bernard Shaw

I showed my appreciation of my native land in the usual Irish way: by getting out of it as soon as I possibly could.

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George Bernard Shaw

If there was nothing wrong in the world there wouldn't be anything for us to do.

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George Bernard Shaw

A miracle is an event which creates faith. That is the purpose and nature of miracles. Frauds deceive. An event which creates faith does not deceive: therefore it is not a fraud, but a miracle.

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George Bernard Shaw

We sing in a church, why can we not dance there?

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George Bernard Shaw

Happy is the man who can make a living by his hobby

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George Bernard Shaw

Our ideals, like the gods of old, are constantly demanding human sacrifices.

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George Bernard Shaw

I don't want to talk grammar. I want to talk like a lady.

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George Bernard Shaw

Orchestras only need to be sworn at, and a German is consequently at an advantage with them, as English profanity, except in America, has not gone beyond a limited technology of perdition.

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George Bernard Shaw

Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got a hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.

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George Bernard Shaw

In an ugly and unhappy world the richest man can purchase nothing but ugliness and unhappiness.

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George Bernard Shaw

The more I see of the moneyed classes, the more I understand the guillotine.

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George Bernard Shaw

Vivisection is a social evil because if it advances human knowledge, it does so at the expense of human character.

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George Bernard Shaw

Happiness and beauty are by-products. Folly is the direct pursuit of happiness and beauty.

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George Bernard Shaw

Set me anything to do as a task, and it is inconceivable the desire I have to do something else.

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George Bernard Shaw

Well, sir, you never can tell. That's a principle in life with me, sir, if you'll excuse my having such a thing.

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George Bernard Shaw

If all you are going to do in life are the things that are convenient and comfortable, the great things never get done.

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George Bernard Shaw

Of all the damnable waste of human life that ever was invented, clerking is the worst.

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George Bernard Shaw

The average age (longevity) of a meat eater is 63. I am on the verge of 85 and still work as hard as ever. I have lived quite long enough and am trying to die; but I simply cannot do it. A single beef-steak...

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George Bernard Shaw

Don't lose faith. Promise yourself that you will be a success story, and I promise you that all the forces of the universe will unite to come to your aid; you might not feel today or for a while, but the...

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George Bernard Shaw

In the arts of life main invents nothing; but in the arts of death he outdoes Nature herself, and produces by chemistry and machinery all the slaughter of plague, pestilence and famine. ... There is nothing...

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George Bernard Shaw

Activity is the only road to knowledge.

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George Bernard Shaw

If at age 20 you are not a Communist then you have no heart. If at age 30 you are not a Capitalist then you have no brains.

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George Bernard Shaw

Where there is no knowledge ignorance calls itself science.

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George Bernard Shaw

I have my own soul. My own spark of divine fire.

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George Bernard Shaw

A miracle, my friend, is an event which creates faith.

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George Bernard Shaw

Science becomes dangerous only when it imagines that it has reached its goal.

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George Bernard Shaw

If any religion had a chance of ruling over England, nay Europe within the next hundred years, it could be Islam.

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George Bernard Shaw

I am a sort of collector of religions: and the curious thing is that I find I can believe in them all.

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George Bernard Shaw

Life would be tolerable but for its amusements.

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George Bernard Shaw

The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves, but how she’s treated.

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George Bernard Shaw

The great secret, Eliza, is not having bad manners or good manners or any other particular sort of manners, but having the same manner for all human souls: in short, behaving as if you were in Heaven,...

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George Bernard Shaw

No use slaving for me and then saying you want to be cared for: who cares for a slave? If you come back, come back for the sake of good fellowship; for you’ll get nothing else.

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George Bernard Shaw

Would the world ever have been made if its maker had been afraid of making trouble?Making life means making trouble. There’s only one way of escaping trouble; and that’s killing things.

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George Bernard Shaw

But to admire a strong person and to live under that strong person’s thumb are two different things.

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George Bernard Shaw

The open mind never acts: when we have done our utmost to arrive at a reasonable conclusion, we still must close our minds for the moment with a snap, and act dogmatically on our conclusions.

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George Bernard Shaw

A man thinking or working is always alone, let him be where he will.

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George Bernard Shaw

For the pre-Darwinian age had come to be regarded as a Dark Age in which men still believed that the book of Genesis was a standard scientific treatise, and that the only additions to it were Galileo'a...

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George Bernard Shaw

Vegetarians claim to be immune from most diseases but they have been known to die from time to time.

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George Bernard Shaw

You propound a complicated arithmetical problem: say cubing a number containing four digits. Give me a slate and half an hour's time, and I can produce a wrong answer.

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George Bernard Shaw

Everything I eat has been proved by some doctor or other to be a deadly poison, and everything I don't eat has been proved to be indispensable for life. But I go marching on.

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George Bernard Shaw

The mathematician is fascinated with the marvelous beauty of the forms he constructs, and in their beauty he finds everlasting truth.

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George Bernard Shaw

What is life but a series of inspired follies...

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George Bernard Shaw

At present there is not a single credible established religion in the world.

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George Bernard Shaw

You know well I couldn't bear to live with a low common man after you two; and it's wicked and cruel of you to insult me by pretending I could.

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George Bernard Shaw

What you are to do without me I cannot imagine.

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George Bernard Shaw

If more than ten percent of the public likes a painting, it should be burned.

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George Bernard Shaw

Like all young men, you greatly exaggerate the difference between one young woman and another.

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George Bernard Shaw

Idiots are always in favour of inequality of income (their only chance of eminence), and the really great in favour of equality.

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George Bernard Shaw

No man can be a pure specialist without being in the strict sense an idiot.

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George Bernard Shaw

The Anti-Vivisector does not deny that physiologists must make experiments and even take chances with new methods. He says that they must not seek knowledge by criminal methods, just as they must not make...

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George Bernard Shaw

With the single exception of Homer, there is no eminent writer, not even Sir Walter Scott, whom I can despise so entirely as I despise Shakespeare when I measure my mind against his. . . . It would positively...

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George Bernard Shaw

The notion that Nature does not proceed by jumps is only one of the budget of plausible lies that we call classical education. Nature always proceeds by jumps. She may spend twenty thousand years making...

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George Bernard Shaw

The American Constitution, one of the few modern political documents drawn up by men who were forced by the sternest circumstances to think out what they really had to face, instead of chopping logic in...

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George Bernard Shaw

Imagination is the beginning of creation.

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George Bernard Shaw

The play was a great success, but audience was a dismal failure.

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George Bernard Shaw

The nation's morals are like its teeth: the more decayed they are the more it hurts to touch them.

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George Bernard Shaw

I make a fortune from criticizing the policy of the government, and then hand it over to the government in taxes to keep it going.

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George Bernard Shaw

I shall always be a flower girl to Professor Higgins, because he always treats me as a flower girl, and always will; but I know I can be a lady to you, because you always treat me as a lady, and always...

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George Bernard Shaw

We are members one of another; so that you cannot injure or help your neighbor without injuring or helping yourself.

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George Bernard Shaw

The English have no respect for their language, and will not teach their children to speak it.

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George Bernard Shaw

Shall I turn up the light for you? No, give me deeper darkness. Money is not made in the light.

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“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”

― Dr. Seuss