Matt Groening

Born: February 15, 1954

Occupation: Cartoonist

Quotes of Matt Groening

Matt Groening

When will people learn? Democracy doesn't work!" (Homer Simpson)

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Matt Groening

I’ll keep it short and sweet - Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

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Matt Groening

I can't believe it! Reading and writing actually paid off!

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Matt Groening

The entire world of grown-ups is corrupt and stupid.

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Matt Groening

I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich.

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Matt Groening

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try.' Homer Simpson

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Matt Groening

When you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all.

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Matt Groening

Everybody is clever, just in their own ways

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Matt Groening

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.

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Matt Groening

I'm presently incarcerated. Convicted of a crime I didn't even commit. Hah! "Attempted murder"? Now honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel prize for attempted chemistry? Do they?

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Matt Groening

Solitude never hurt anyone. Emily Dickinson lived alone, and she wrote some of the most beautiful poetry the world has ever known... then went crazy as a loon." Lisa Simpson

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Matt Groening

Do we have any food that wasn't brutally slaughtered?" Homer: "Well, I think the veal died of loneliness.

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Matt Groening

The next time you are contemplating a decision in which you are debating whether or not to go for the gusto, ask yourself this important question: "How long am I going to be dead?" With that perspective,...

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Matt Groening

Today is the first day of the rest of your short, brutish existence as a sentient creature before being snuffed out into utter nothingness for all eternity.

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Matt Groening

Me fail English? That's unpossible.

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Matt Groening

When you're as important as I am, getting your feelings hurt by me is almost an honor.

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Matt Groening

If people only knew how much I secretly hated them, they'd love me for holding it in.

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Matt Groening

I don't mind sharing the blame if she'll just admit she started it.

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Matt Groening

How can I be expected to love someone who tries such crude manipulations as bringing me breakfast in bed?

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Matt Groening

I'm not going to stop torturing myself till I figure out the cause of my pain.

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Matt Groening

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

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Matt Groening

Living creatively is really important to maintain throughout your life. And living creatively doesn't mean only artistic creativity, although that's part of it. It means being yourself, not just complying...

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Matt Groening

God often gives nuts to toothless people.

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Matt Groening

When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities.

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Matt Groening

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and answer to, all of life's problems.

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Matt Groening

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

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Matt Groening

Sometimes people try to read into my strip and find out what my state of mind is. And I can say if I'm in a good mood, generally the comic strip starts out in a good mood, but the punchline is very negative...

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Matt Groening

Families are about love overcoming emotional torture.

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Matt Groening

I don't have to be careful, I've got a gun.

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Matt Groening

It's a funny show. The characters are surprisingly likable, given how ugly they are. We've got this huge cast of characters that we can move around. And over the last few seasons, we've explored some of...

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Matt Groening

A lot of our writers, like Conan O'Brien, moved on to other things.

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Matt Groening

As astute followers of 'Life in Hell' will notice, Akbar and Jeff wear the same striped T-shirt as Charlie Brown. 'Peanuts' was very important to me.

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Matt Groening

Basically, everything I try to do is to present an alternative to what somebody else is doing.

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Matt Groening

Because good writing in a TV cartoon is so rare, I think the animation on The Simpsons is often overlooked.

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Matt Groening

Cartooning is for people who can't quite draw and can't quite write. You combine the two half-talents and come up with a career.

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Matt Groening

Don't have a cow, man.

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Matt Groening

Everybody doesn't have to get every joke. People really appreciate not being condescended to.

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Matt Groening

I also found child's play - stuff that was not considered serious, but goofy - was the stuff I liked to do, so I still do it as an adult.

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Matt Groening

I always say that 'Futurama' is real, and 'The Simpsons' is fiction.

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Matt Groening

I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I will do it again.

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Matt Groening

I judge my life by how miserable it used to be. If I could pay my rent, I was deliriously happy. Now I'm deliriously happy all the time.

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Matt Groening

I like the 'Simpsons' pinball machines. Those are pretty great.

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Matt Groening

I think in daily newspapers, the way comic strips are treated, it's as if newspaper publishers are going out of their way to kill the medium.

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Matt Groening

I want it to go on, but I want us to go out on top.

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Matt Groening

I was always frightened by taverns. They just seemed like very unpleasant places to go.

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Matt Groening

In 'Futurama,' the skin color is no longer yellow. They have actually evolved to cartoon skin tone. But they still have four fingers.

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Matt Groening

Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun.

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Matt Groening

Most TV shows don't reward you for paying attention.

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Matt Groening

Oftentimes, what seems to be a street lunatic charging at me spouting gibberish turns out to be a devoted 'Simpsons' fan quoting their favorite line.

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Matt Groening

People go into cartooning because they're shy and they're angry. That's when you're sitting in the back of a classroom drawing the teacher.

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Matt Groening

'The Simpsons' is about alienation and the ambivalence of living with a family who you love but who drive you completely crazy.

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Matt Groening

'The Simpsons' is an especially collaborative show.

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Matt Groening

We've been running a little behind schedule. But only by about 15 years or so.

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Matt Groening

We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very funny stuff.

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Matt Groening

Well, most grown-ups forget what it was like to be a kid. I vowed that I would never forget.

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Matt Groening

Our solution on 'The Simpsons' is to do jokes that people who have an education, or some frame of reference, can get. And for the ones who don't, it doesn't matter, because we have Homer banging his head...

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Matt Groening

'Adult Swim' on the Cartoon Network is unbelievable. And 'South Park' continues to do great stuff. And 'Family Guy' and the various other Seth MacFarlane projects are amazing.

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Matt Groening

Back in high school, I wrote a novel about a character named Bart Simpson. I thought it was a very unusual name for a kid at the time. I had this idea of an angry father yelling 'Bart,' and Bart sounds...

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Matt Groening

I basically drew my own family. My father's name is Homer. My mother's name is Margaret. I have a sister Lisa and another sister Maggie, so I drew all of them. I was going to name the main character Matt,...

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Matt Groening

I draw a weekly comic strip called Life in Hell, which is syndicated in about 250 newspapers. That's what I did before The Simpsons, and what I plan to do for the rest of my life.

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Matt Groening

I grew up completely overwhelmed by TV, and part of the reason why I have gone into television is as a way to justify to myself all those wasted hours of watching TV as a kid. I can now look back and say,...

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Matt Groening

I had been drawing my weekly comic strip, 'Life in Hell,' for about five years when I got a call from Jim Brooks, who was developing 'The Tracey Ullman Show' for the brand-new Fox network. He wanted me...

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Matt Groening

I have less to do with 'The Simpsons' every season, but I stick my nose in here and there. Basically, it's just trying to keep the characters consistent and making sure the show has a soul.

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Matt Groening

I know for a fact, obviously, because my kids grew up watching the show, that there are some things they are introduced to from 'The Simpsons', and then later in life they see the thing we're parodying....

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Matt Groening

I like all of the early relationship strips that were collected in 'Love Is Hell,' where I pretended to be an expert in relationships and did comics like 'The Nine Types of Boyfriends,' 'Sixteen Ways to...

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Matt Groening

I loved literary science fiction. In fact, as a kid, when I was reading science fiction, I thought 'I can't wait for the future when the special effects are good' to represent what was in these books by...

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Matt Groening

I may be biting off more than I can chew, but with 'The Simpsons' and with 'Futurama,' what I'm trying to do in the guise of light entertainment, if this is possible - is nudge people, jostle them a little,...

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Matt Groening

I think 'Family Guy' and 'American Dad' have definitely staked out their own style and territory, and now the accusations are coming that 'The Simpsons' is taking jokes from 'Family Guy.' And I can tell...

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Matt Groening

I think there is a certain charm to the hand drawn image that I like. My problem with CGI is that it's so rich in texture that my eyes actually get tired. Everything is in focus down to the littlest leaf.

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Matt Groening

I think when 'The Simpsons' first came on, there was an uproar. People got used to it. They realized the show's really funny, it's got a heart, so I think it's pretty safe.

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Matt Groening

I thought I was going to make crazy cartoons for the rest of my life. I didn't think I'd ever get paid for it, didn't think I drew well enough, but I knew it made me happy.

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Matt Groening

I went through a phase where people would introduce me at parties as a cartoonist, and everybody felt sorry for me. 'Oh, Matt's a cartoonist.' Then people further feeling sorry for me would ask me to draw...

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Matt Groening

I went to Bali, and I was in a small village, and somebody who was with me showed a woman a little figurine of Bart and asked: 'Do you know who this is?' And she said: 'Mickey Mouse.'

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Matt Groening

I've conducted an experiment on my kids. Instead of denying them access to media, I've encouraged it. They read comic books, play Nintendo and watch way too much TV.

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Matt Groening

I've loved science fiction ever since I was a little kid, mainly from looking at the covers of science-fiction magazines and books, and I've read quite extensively as an adult.

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Matt Groening

If I have one technology tip of the day, it's this: No matter how good the video on YouTube is, don't read the comments, just don't, because it will make you hate all humans.

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Matt Groening

My father was a really sharp cartoonist and filmmaker. He used to tape-record the family surreptitiously, either while we were driving around or at dinner, and in 1963 he and I made up a story about a...

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Matt Groening

Nihilism in American comedy came along way before 'The Simpsons.' There was a fairly nihilistic point of view to 'Saturday Night Live,' for instance, back in the beginning, and a lot of really dark comedy...

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Matt Groening

On 'The Simpsons,' I will say that we definitely like to comment on what's going on in the world, and we try to be funny. If we can figure out a way of being funny about it, then we've gone part of the...

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Matt Groening

Since I was there in the very beginning, I know the history of the characters. So, I make comments about the tone and sometimes remind the writers that we've done that before.

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Matt Groening

Sometimes people get mad at The Simpsons' subversive story telling, but there's another message in there, which is a celebration of making wild, funny stories.

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Matt Groening

The conundrum that I face on a daily basis is that I have two sons who have grown up watching 'The Simpsons,' so they know exactly what buttons to push. They know how Bart irritates Homer, and they use...

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Matt Groening

The nice thing about 'Futurama' for me personally was that it was a way to honor some of the traditional ideas in literary science fiction, not so much movie or television science fiction - although we...

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Matt Groening

The really great thing about having two TV shows going on at the same time is that I can go to one and say that I have to go and visit the other, and then I can just go home, and they don't know.

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Matt Groening

The scary thing about the future... there will be tiny cameras everywhere, and they'll be flying around like mosquitoes and drones. That will be bad. Drones are scary. You can't reason with a drone.

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Matt Groening

'The Simpsons' basically - and 'Futurama' - are really smart shows. They're kind of disguised as these goofy animated sitcoms, but the references within the shows, if you're paying attention, are pretty...

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Matt Groening

'The Simpsons' from the very beginning was based on our memories of brash '60s sitcoms - you had a main title theme that was bombastic and grabbed your attention - and when you look at TV shows of the...

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Matt Groening

'The Simpsons' obviously is a huge success, and Fox has nothing to do with its success, with its creative success, and as a result they don't really like the show. They don't like 'The Simpsons' at Fox.

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Matt Groening

'The Simpsons' was about children and married parents; 'Futurama' is about people in between; they're growing up and haven't settled down. Every other cartoon show seemed to be, you know, dumb dad, bratty...

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Matt Groening

The thing about a cartoon is, you can do whatever you want. The tightrope that we are walking on 'The Simpsons' and 'Futurama' is 'How do you continue to surprise the audience, but make them good surprises?'...

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Matt Groening

The thing that makes me happiest about Simpsons Illustrated are all the drawings that we get from readers. I wish we could print them all. They're really imaginative. They show a lot of hard work.

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Matt Groening

The writers led by Mike Scully are fantastic. And they're creating original stories that not only don't repeat what we've already done, they also don't repeat anything I've seen on television.

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Matt Groening

There's always room out there for the hand-drawn image. I personally like the imperfection of hand drawing as opposed to the slick look of computer animation. But you can do good stuff either way. The...

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Matt Groening

We did 'The Simpsons Movie,' which took almost four years; it was the same people that do the TV show, and it just killed us. So that's why there hasn't been a second movie. But I imagine if the show ever...

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Matt Groening

We have 'Doctor Who' references on 'Futurama,' but we have a lot of science fiction references that I don't get; but in the staff we have experts on 'Star Trek,' 'Star Wars,' 'Doctor Who' and 'Dungeons...

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Matt Groening

When The Simpsons came around, there really was nothing else like it on TV. It's hard to imagine, but when Fox first took the plunge with it, it was considered controversial to put animation on prime time.

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Matt Groening

With 'Futurama,' I wanted to do unrequited love, and David Cohen agreed, and although our original plan was never to have Fry and Leela get together, we finally just said, 'You can only string the fans...

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Matt Groening

With animation, because you can draw anything and do anything and have the characters do whatever you want, the tendency is to be very loose with the boundaries and the rules.

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Matt Groening

I plead alignment to the flakes of the untitled snakes of a merry cow and to the republicrats for which they scam: one nacho, underpants with licorice and jugs of wine for owls.

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Matt Groening

Did you hear something?" "No." "Did I hear something?" "...I don't know...

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Matt Groening

But Marge, what if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just make God madder and madder.

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Matt Groening

I'd be vegetarian if bacon grew on trees

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Matt Groening

I promise I'll do anything for you, especialy if it's easy. Homer Simpson

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Matt Groening

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman. Homer Simpson

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Matt Groening

English? Who needs that? I'm never going to England.

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Matt Groening

America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!

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Matt Groening

Keep your expectations tiny you'll go through life not so whiney.

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Matt Groening

Never! Never, Marge. I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride...

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Matt Groening

You toyed with my heart, like it was a toy heart. (Lisa Simpson)

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Matt Groening

Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel.

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Matt Groening

I know all those words, but that sentence makes no sense to me.

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Matt Groening

This doesn't happen in America! Maybe Ohio, but not in America!" Homer Simpson

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Matt Groening

You can't keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once, and move on." Homer Simpson

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Matt Groening

I didn't lie, I was writing fiction with my mouth." Homer Simpson

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Matt Groening

Do my worst, eh? Smithers, release the robotic Richard Simmons." --Mr. Burns

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Matt Groening

Ned, have you considered any of the other major religions? They're all pretty much the same." --Reverend Lovejoy

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Matt Groening

Of course I’ve gone mad with power! Have you ever tried going mad without power? It’s boring and no one listens to you! — Russ Cargill

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Matt Groening

Welcome to Suckersville, man.

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Matt Groening

But we all had an agreement to let each other get away with everything! That's Capitalism!

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Matt Groening

I'm a level 5 vegan, I don't eat anything that casts a shadow.

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Matt Groening

I'm a writer who just happens to draw

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Matt Groening

American culture has a lot of great moustaches in its history. Mark Twain had a great moustache, Charlie Chaplin, Ben Turpin ... but Zappa, he's got the best moustache in American history. Got the moustache,...

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Matt Groening

The amazing thing about Freak Out! was that there was nothing quite like it in rock 'n roll at the time. It was really simultaneously crude and ugly, and incredibly sophisticated. The Beatles were funny,...

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Matt Groening

I was very disturbed when Jesus found a demon in a guy, and he put the demon in a herd of pigs, then sent them off a cliff. What did the pigs do? I could never figure that out. It just seemed very un-Christian....

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Matt Groening

Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life be without it?

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Matt Groening

Aren't we forgeting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.

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Matt Groening

How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how...

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Matt Groening

I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff.

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Matt Groening

Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.

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Matt Groening

If something is too hard to do, then it's not worth doing. You just stick that guitar in the closet next to your shortwave radio, your karate outfit and your unicycle and we'll go inside and watch TV.

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Matt Groening

Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.

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“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”

― Dr. Seuss