Sarah Dessen

Born: June 6, 1970

Occupation: Writer

Quotes of Sarah Dessen

Sarah Dessen

It takes so little to change everything. If you really thought about it, it would scare you to death.

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Sarah Dessen

Everything looks different when you're older, not staring up at the world but down upon it.

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Sarah Dessen

Some things you don't have to tell. Some things, between sisters, are understood.

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Sarah Dessen

What happened to goodbye?

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Sarah Dessen

What did it feel like, I wondered, to love someone that much? So much that you couldn't even control yourself when they came close, as if you might just break free of whatever was holding you and throw...

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Sarah Dessen

Music is a total constant. That's why we have such a strong visceral connection to it, you know? Because a song can take you back instantly to a moment, or a place, or even a person. No matter what else...

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Sarah Dessen

It was always late at night, when everything and everyone else was quiet, that those voices would rise like ghosts, soft and haunting, filling your mind until sleep finally came.

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Sarah Dessen

But it's strange, when you've always been told something is true, like the moon will come back. You need proof. And while you wait, you feel the entire balance of your world just tipping. It's crazy. But...

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Sarah Dessen

If you try anything, if you try to lose weight, or to improve yourself, or to love, or to make the world a better place, you have already achieved something wonderful, before you even begin. Forget failure....

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Sarah Dessen

It's just that...I just think that some things are meant to be broken. Imperfect. Chaotic. It's the universe's way of providing contrast, you know? There have to be a few holes in the road. It's how life...

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Sarah Dessen

We laughed ourselves silly, taking back our shared past, gently, piece by piece.

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Sarah Dessen

It's funny how someone's perception of you can be formed without you even knowing it.

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Sarah Dessen

I tried to hold myself apart, showing only what I wanted, doling out bits and pieces of who I was. But that only works out for so long. Eventually, even the smallest fragments can't help but, make a whole.

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Sarah Dessen

But when you're alone in the world, really alone, you have no choice but to be open to suggestions.

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Sarah Dessen

Growing up means :propelling yourself forward into whatever lies ahead, one turn of the wheel at a time.

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Sarah Dessen

I spent a lot of time looking at that picture. Wondering what I’d think of that girl, if I was someone else, seeing how easily she sits in her boyfriend’s lap, laughing, with his arms around her. I...

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Sarah Dessen

Life is long. Just because you don't get your chance right when you want or expect it doesn't mean it won't come. Fate doesn't punch a time clock or consult a schedule.

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Sarah Dessen

I'm sorry," I heard him say again. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a sudden blur of movement as he slid out of his seat, left some bills for the breakfast he wouldn't eat, and walked away. And...

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Sarah Dessen

The thing is, you can’t always have the best of everything. Because for a life to be real, you need it all: good and bad, beach and concrete, the familiar and the unknown, big talkers and small towns.

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Sarah Dessen

The mistakes you make now count. Not for everything, and not forever. But they do matter, and they shape you.

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Sarah Dessen

It's always very pure, that last moment before an ugly, unsettling truth hits someone. The most stark of before-and-afters.

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Sarah Dessen

When you've never gotten love from someone, you don't know what it might look like if it ever does appear. You look for it in everything: any bright light overhead could be a star.

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Sarah Dessen

So I just decided to relax into it, bumpy and crazy as it might be, and try for once to just go along for the ride.

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Sarah Dessen

And trying to break it down this way, to minor and major offenses, maybes and what-ifs, was like arguing over the origin of cracks in a broken egg. It was done. How it happened didn't matter anymore.

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Sarah Dessen

You need demarcation." "Demarcation?" I asked. "It means a clear separation between two things," he told me. "A solid end before a clean beginning. No murky borders. Clarity.

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Sarah Dessen

But the bottom line is that, as humans, we are by nature selfish creatures. The only way we care about anything, really, is by making it about us.

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Sarah Dessen

From what I could see, the hardwood was just fine. Then again, I'd just see a windmill and an open sky, too, never feeling the need to conquer either. You think it's all obvious and straightforward, this...

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Sarah Dessen

It was such a weird thing how a breakup stretched much wider than you expected. You didn't just lose a person, but their entire world as well.

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe it was just part of growing up with someone. Once you have a rhythm and stay with it long enough, it's not hard to find again.

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Sarah Dessen

Change is inevitable, though," he replied. "As is disappointment. Best to get used to it now.

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Sarah Dessen

We were willing to do so much for the people we loved, even if it meant hurting ourselves. Maybe that, in the end, was what love- all kinds- was really about.

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Sarah Dessen

I'm starting to think, though, that some things never get that. The replay, and all. So at some point you have to make peace with it as it is, not keep waiting for a chance to change it

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Sarah Dessen

The mistakes you make now count. Not for everything, and not forever. But they do matter, and they shape you.If you take nothing else from what I've been through, at least remember this: make your choices...

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Sarah Dessen

When you have a kid, you sign on for the whole package: good, bad, everything in between. you can't just dip in and out, picking and choosing the parts you want and quitting when it's not perfect.

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Sarah Dessen

It's funny how two people can grow up in the same town, go to the same school, have the same friends, and end up so totally different. Family, or lack of it, counts for more than you'd think.

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Sarah Dessen

You know, when it works, love is pretty amazing. It's not overrated. There's a reason for all those songs.

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Sarah Dessen

Everything, in the end, comes down to timing. One second, one minute, one hour could make all the difference.

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Sarah Dessen

And for one second, it was like I could feel the timing clicking together, finally pieces falling into place.

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Sarah Dessen

Remy: Did you really believe, that first day, that we were meant to be together? Dexter: You're here, aren't you?

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Sarah Dessen

That's the thing about someone who rarely gets upset: when they do, you notice.

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Sarah Dessen

Again, it occurred to me how weird it was to be permanent in a place that to everyone else was only temporary. Like I could never be sure if they were the ones who weren't real, or if I was.

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Sarah Dessen

But as was so often the case, it was the one person missing who you thought about more than the ones who were right in front of you.

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Sarah Dessen

I always thought I was different.

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Sarah Dessen

which is completely out-of-line behavior. Then you are wholly within your rights to stomp on their foot." "No," Delia said, over her shoulder. "Actually, you're not. Just excuse yourself as politely as...

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Sarah Dessen

You can never be sure of anyone until you're close enough to see them clearly.

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Sarah Dessen

Being a star requires risk-taking shoes.

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Sarah Dessen

Then what are you like, Annabel?" he shot back. "A liar, like you told me that first day? Come on. That was the biggest lie of all.

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Sarah Dessen

You can't make any one person your world. The trick is to take what each can give you and build a world from it.

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Sarah Dessen

With love like that, you can't get pick about how it finds you or the details. All that matters is that it's there. Better late than never.

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Sarah Dessen

How weird that must be, to stay the same as everyone else changes.

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Sarah Dessen

I would miss Colby, but it wasn't going anywhere. All the more reason why I should.

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Sarah Dessen

That's what this has been all about for you, correct? Make it clear. That you and me--it was nothing more that you'll have with Spinnerbait boy, or the guy after that, or the guy after that. Right?" "Yeah,...

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Sarah Dessen

And so we stood there in the kitchen, my mother and I, facing off over everything that had built up since June, when I was willing to hand myself over free and clear. Now I needed her to return it all...

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Sarah Dessen

I just thought to my self, all of a sudden, that we had something in common. A natural chemistry, if you will. And I had a feeling that something big was going to happen. To both of us. That we were, in...

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Sarah Dessen

Say what you will, but you’re never prepared for the surprise attack.

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Sarah Dessen

Morris was not the type to offer a hug or even hold your hand. But there was something in his quiet indignation at the universe then--and Luke, now--that was just the kind of comfort I needed. "I'm such...

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Sarah Dessen

Love is so unpredictable. Sometimes you'll know a man for years and then one day, boom! Suddenly you see him in a different way. And other times, it's that first date, that first moment. That's what makes...

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Sarah Dessen

I'd heard of Evergreen Care Center before. Cass and I had always made fun of the stupid ads they ran on TV, featuring some dragged-out woman with a limp perm and big, painted-on circles under her eyes,...

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Sarah Dessen

Your mother won a special reward," she told me, "because everyone had a head in her pictures. We all applauded.

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Sarah Dessen

Rogerson," I asked him sweetly as we sat watching a video in the pool house, "where would I find the pelagic zone?" "In the open sea," he said. "Now shut up and eat your Junior Mints.

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Sarah Dessen

My point is, there are a lot of people in the world. No one ever sees everything the same way you do; it just doesn't happen. So when you find one person who gets a couple of things, especially if they're...

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Sarah Dessen

But in the real world, you couldnt really just split a family down the middle, mom on one side, dad the other, with the child equally divided between. It was like when you ripped a piece of paper into...

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Sarah Dessen

Outside, the ocean was crashing, waves hitting sand, then pulling back to sea. I thought of everything being washed away, again and again. We make such messes in this life, both accidentally and on purpose....

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Sarah Dessen

I was beginning to see, though, that the unknown wasn't always the greatest thing to fear. The people who know you best can be risker, because the words they say and things they think have the potential...

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Sarah Dessen

I don't lie." "You don't lie," I repeated. "That's what I said." "Ever." "Nope." Sure you don't, I thought.

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Sarah Dessen

So you're always honest," I said. "Aren't you?" "No," I told him. "I'm not." "Well, that's good to know, I guess." "I'm not saying I'm a liar," I told him. He raised his eyebrows. "That's not how I meant...

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Sarah Dessen

He doesn’t love me. He might still love me as I was at fifteen, when I didn’t know any better. When I trusted everyone. I’m not that person any more. He’s just a boy. He was the first to really...

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Sarah Dessen

We didn't talk about our scars, the ones you could see and the ones you couldn't.

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Sarah Dessen

I reached up with my finger and traced the scar over my eyebrow, remembering when that was the greatest hurt I'd ever known.

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Sarah Dessen

I couldn't imagine what it would be like to be one of so many, to have not just parents and siblings but cousins and aunts and uncles, an entire tribe to claim as your own. Maybe you would feel lost in...

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Sarah Dessen

Still, there was also was something reassuring about working for Commercial, almost hopeful. Like things that were lost could be found again. As we drove away, I always tried to imagine what it would be...

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Sarah Dessen

Only a weak person needed someone else around all the time.

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Sarah Dessen

With my mom, when someone was gone, they were gone. She didn't waste another minute thinking about them, and neither should you.

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Sarah Dessen

Looking back, it seemed like it should have been harder to lose someone, or have them lose you, especially when they were in the same state, only a few towns over.

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Sarah Dessen

When he stopped walking and kissed me a few minutes later, it was like time had stopped, with the air, my heart, and the world all so still. And it was this I remembered every other time I was with Marshall.

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Sarah Dessen

This is exactly what i wanted, as commitments had never really been my thing. And it wasn't like it was hard, either. The only trick was never giving more than you were willing to lose.

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Sarah Dessen

Okay. Enough." I got out of the closet, brushing myself off, then turned around to face her. "This is happening. So you need to go downstairs, face your fears, and make the best of it, and everything will...

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Sarah Dessen

I paused, only just now realizing that the subject was hitting a little close to home. "You know, getting hurt. Putting herself out there, opening up to someone." Yeah," he said adding some cheese straws...

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Sarah Dessen

Total commitment," I said. "You know, the idea of discovering something that, for all intents and purposes, goes against your abilities, and yet still deciding to do it anyway. That takes guts, you know?

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Sarah Dessen

I just don't know," I said, my voice sounding bumby, not like mine, "how do you help someone who doesn't want your help. What do you do when you can't do anything?

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Sarah Dessen

My mother has always been the point I calibrated myself against. In knowing where she was, I could always locate myself, as well. These months she'd been gone, I felt like I'd been floating, loose and...

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Sarah Dessen

At the same time, though, I was beginning to wonder if this was just how it was supposed to be for me, like perhaps I wasn't capable of having that many people in my life at any one time. My mom turned...

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Sarah Dessen

Look," I said, "We knew Jason and Becky would be back, the break would end. This isn't a surprise, it's what's supposed to happen. It's what we wanted. Right?" "Is it?" he asked. "Is it what you want?"...

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Sarah Dessen

I knew, in the silence that followed, that anything could happen here. It might be too late: again, I might have missed my chance. But I would at least know I tried, that I took my heart and extended my...

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Sarah Dessen

Now, see," Wes said, nodding at my plate, "this is going to blow your mind." I looked at him. "It's a waffle, not the second coming.

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Sarah Dessen

instead, we just sat there, together but really apart, watching a show about a stranger and all her secrets, while keeping our own to ourselves, as always.

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Sarah Dessen

Because maybe, the best of times were yet to come. You never knew.

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Sarah Dessen

I mean, to me, freaking out is different. More of a running away, not telling anyone what's wrong, slowly simmering until you burst kind of thing.

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Sarah Dessen

Let me guess,” Eli said, his voice that low, even timbre, as always. “Drinking from kegs also falls under outdoor activity.” I just looked at him, standing there in jeans and the same blue hoodie...

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Sarah Dessen

When you can't save yourself or your heart, it helps to be able to save face.

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Sarah Dessen

Two a.m.' He swallowed, then said, "You know. The person you can call at two a.m. and, no matter what, you can count on them. Even if they're asleep or it's cold or you need to be bailed out of jail...they'll...

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Sarah Dessen

I mean, it's not surprising, really. Once you love something, you always love it in some way. You have to. It's, like, part of you for good.

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Sarah Dessen

The first thing I did when I got inside was turn on the kitchen light. Then I moved to the table, putting my dad's iPod on the speaker dock, and a Bob Dylan song came on, the notes familiar. I went into...

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Sarah Dessen

Never would forever, with all its meanings, be so clear and distinct as in the true, guaranteed end of the world.

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Sarah Dessen

I mean, it's impossible to fake anything if you've already seen the other person in a way they'd never choose for you to. You can't go back from that.

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Sarah Dessen

You asked me to go out with you. I know you probably changed your mind. But you should know, the answer was yes. It's always been yes when it comes to you.

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Sarah Dessen

We'd start slow, the way we always did, because the run, and the game, could go on for awhile. Maybe even forever. That was the thing. You just never knew. Forever was so many different things. It was...

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Sarah Dessen

Sorry!' Dave's friend yelled when he saw me. 'That was my-' But i wasn't listening as,instead,i took every bit of the anger and stress of the last few minutes and days put it behind the ball, throwing...

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Sarah Dessen

So much had happened that morning. Yet it was this image, this moment, that i kept going back to hours later, after we'd made it safely to the walkway and gone our separate ways to classes. How it felt...

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Sarah Dessen

You didn't have to take a punch for me, you know,' he said. 'I'm a lover, not a fighter.' 'You're a freak is what you are,' I said. He stuck out his hand. 'Come on, slugger. Walk with me. You know you...

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Sarah Dessen

You ready to play?" Dave asked, bouncing it. "I don't know," I said. "Are you going to cheat?" "It's street ball!" He said checking it to me. "Show me that love." So chessy, i thought. But as i felt it,...

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Sarah Dessen

It's harder that in looks," I told him when I finally got back in the car. "Most things are,

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Sarah Dessen

You didn't fail. You just opted out. There's a difference.

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Sarah Dessen

Get back on that bike.

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Sarah Dessen

I'd come here planning to leave as soon as I could. It was a pit stop, not a destination. I had my whole life mapped out." "So what happened?" "I guess that map didn't turn out to be mine after all,

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Sarah Dessen

I'd learn that it's not just where you go, but how you choose to get there. So I pulled that sign off the green bike - ENJOY YOUR RIDE! - and went inside to take the first step toward doing just that.

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Sarah Dessen

I looked down again at the sign in my hand - ENJOY THE RIDE! - and it seemed, suddenly, to be just that. A sign.

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Sarah Dessen

You want me to give her a key?" the guy asked. "I want you to give her a possibility," she told him, looking at my necklace again. "And that's what a key represents. An open door, a chance. You know?

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Sarah Dessen

Your past is always your past. Even if you forget it, it remembers you.

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Sarah Dessen

If only you could really use a fail-proof system to know who was worth keeping and who needed to be thrown away. It would make it so much easier to move through the world, picking and choosing what connections...

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Sarah Dessen

It was amazing how you could get so far from where you'd planned, and yet find it was exactly were you needed to be.

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Sarah Dessen

There's something nice about the silence of a car ride in the dark, going home. When you were tired of the radio and conversation, and it was okay to just be alone with your thoughts and the road ahead....

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Sarah Dessen

Home wasn't a set house, or a single town on a map. It was wherever the people who loved you were, whenever you were together. Not a place, but a moment, and then another, building on each other like bricks...

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Sarah Dessen

Fine...a word that you said when someone asked how you were but didn't really care to know the truth.

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Sarah Dessen

Listen,"Kristy said," the truth is,nothing is guranteed. You know better than anybody." She looked at me hard,making sure I knew what she meant.I did."So don't be afraid.Be alive.

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Sarah Dessen

Oh for God's sake,' Heather said, 'I wish you two would just go out, fail miserably as a couple, and get it over with.

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Sarah Dessen

Suddenly, I was just sure he was going to kiss me. He was there, I could feel his breath, the ground solid beneath us. But then something crossed his face, a thought, a hesitation, and he shifted slightly....

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Sarah Dessen

Watching him, I thought, not for the first time that night, that maybe it should have felt strange to be with him, here, now. And yet it didn’t, at all. That was one of the things about the night. Stuff...

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Sarah Dessen

Silence is so freaking loud

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Sarah Dessen

Sometimes, we just have to be happy with what people can offer us. Even if it's not what we want, at least it's something.

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Sarah Dessen

Everyone has their weak spot. The one thing that, despite your best efforts, will always bring you to your knees, regardless of how strong you are otherwise.

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Sarah Dessen

The further you go, the more you have to be proud of. At the same time, in order to come a long way, you have to be behind to begin with. IN the end, though maybe it's not how you reach a place that matters....

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Sarah Dessen

If you didn't always have to choose between turning away for good or rushing in deeper. In the moments that it really counts, maybe it's enough - more than enough, even - just to be there.

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Sarah Dessen

We can't expect everybody to be there for us, all at once. So it's a lucky thing that really, all you need is someone.

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Sarah Dessen

But I'd long ago learned not to be picky in farewells. They weren't guaranteed or promised. You were lucky, more than blessed, if you got a good-bye at all.

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Sarah Dessen

Not everything's perfect, especially in the beginning. And its all right to have a little bit of regret every once in a while. It's when you feel it all the time and can't do anything about it... that's...

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Sarah Dessen

Because the truth sometimes hurts," I said. Yeah," he said. "So do lies, though.

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Sarah Dessen

If you didn't love him, this never would have happened. But you did. And accepting that love and everything that followed it is part of letting it go.

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Sarah Dessen

Harder to get in than out, like so little else.

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Sarah Dessen

Home wasn't a set house, or a single town on a map. It was wherever the people who loved you were, whenever you were together.

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Sarah Dessen

Mayonnaise is a lot like men, it can make everything much better, adding flavor and ease to your life. Or, it can just be sticky and gross and make you nauseous"- "Keeping the Moon

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Sarah Dessen

Yeah. I mean, acknowledging is easy. Something happened or it didn't. But understanding... that's where things get sticky.

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Sarah Dessen

It was like when you ripped a piece of paper into two: no matter how you tried, the seams never fit exactly right again.

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Sarah Dessen

And she was good to me: strong, fun, and fiercely loyal. And if I didn't have many other friends because of her-most girls were intimidated by her looks, or thought she was too pushy, or just flat-out...

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Sarah Dessen

Behind the camera, I was invisible. When I lifted it up to my eye it was like I crawled into the lens, losing myself there. and everything else fell away.

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Sarah Dessen

There are some things in this world you rely on, like a sure bet. And when they let you down, shifting from where you've carefully placed them, it shakes your faith, right where you stand.

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Sarah Dessen

You can't just plan a moment when things get back on track, just as you can't plan the moment you lose your way in the first place.

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Sarah Dessen

Because it is so hard, in any life, to believe in what you can’t fully understand.

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Sarah Dessen

You want to take me to a movie?" I asked. "Well, not really," he said. "What I really want is for you to be my girlfriend. But I thought saying that might scare you off.

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Sarah Dessen

But anyone can begin. It was the part with all the promise, the potential, the things I loved. More and more, though, I was finding myself wanting to find out what happened in the end..

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe not," she said as we came to the car. "But maybe that isn't so bad. You can't love anyone that way more than once in a lifetime. It's too hard and it hurts too much when it ends. The first boy is...

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Sarah Dessen

She was just a shell of her former self, functioning and talking but hardly alive.

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Sarah Dessen

Now I felt like I was drifting, sucked down by an undertow, and too far out to swim back to the shore.

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Sarah Dessen

I couldn't tell her. I couldn't tell anyone. As long as I didn't say it aloud, it wasn't real.

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Sarah Dessen

She took the sun when it came and the rain the same way.

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Sarah Dessen

For two hours I'd felt myself stretching tighter and tighter, like a rubber band pulled to the point of snapping. And now, I could feel the smaller, weaker part of myself beginning to fray, tiny bits giving...

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Sarah Dessen

If there's one thing I've learned in the last few months, it's that sometimes you just have to close your eyes and jump.

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Sarah Dessen

During this time we've been apart, it's you I've thought of when I'm at my weakest, and you who have pulled me through.

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Sarah Dessen

I felt like I'd been swimming so hard, and the water growing warmer and warmer the closer I got to the top. I wasn't there yet, but now I could see the surface, rippling just beyond my fingers.

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Sarah Dessen

funny how a beautiful song could tell such a sad story

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Sarah Dessen

But if everything was always smooth and perfect, you'd get too used to that, you know? You have to have a little bit of disorganization now and then. Otherwise, you'll never really enjoy it when things...

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Sarah Dessen

Anyone can hide. Facing up to things, working through them, that's what makes you strong.

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Sarah Dessen

From this distance, in the dimness, the model looked surreal, made up of parts filled with buildings, bordered by long stretches of empty space. It reminded me of the way cities and towns look when you...

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Sarah Dessen

I walked over, my eyes scanning Luna Blu, my house, and Dave's. But it was the building behind them, that empty hotel, that had the tiniest light, provided by one word, written in fluorescent paint. Maybe...

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Sarah Dessen

Everyone laughed, and just like that, the conversation shifted, jumping to another topic. It was fast and furious, the talking, the emotions, the back-and-forth and forth-and-back. I realized that if I...

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Sarah Dessen

So I left him there alone to watch history repeat the same events retold again and again on his own.

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Sarah Dessen

But there was something I liked about the idea of those seeds buried so deep having at least a chance to emerge

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Sarah Dessen

But that was the problem with having the answers. It was only after you gave them that you realized they sometimes weren't what people wanted to hear.

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Sarah Dessen

It was great. Freedom even the imagined kind always is.

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Sarah Dessen

Everything hurt. I closed my eyes, pressing my cheek to the street, and waited. What for, I didn't know. To be rescued. Or found. But no one came. All I'd ever thought I wanted was to be left alone. Until...

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Sarah Dessen

I sat up, sliding them off, and the quiet around me did not, for once, seem empty and vast. Instead, for the first time in a while, it felt like it already was full.

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Sarah Dessen

That was the thing. You never got used to it, the idea of someone being gone. Just when you think it's reconciled, accepted, someone points it out to you, and it just hits you all over again, that shocking.

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Sarah Dessen

I like flaws. I think they make things interesting.

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Sarah Dessen

Despite my dad's assurances I was strangely nervous my stomach tight ever since we'd hung up. Maybe Deb had picked up on this and it was why she'd pretty much talked nonstop since I'd approached her and...

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Sarah Dessen

He's very nice. He's something I replied. She considered this zipping her purse shut. Then she said Well everyone is. Everyone is Something. For some reason that stuck with me simple and yet not every...

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Sarah Dessen

And while it is hard enough to take away something that makes a person happy it's even more difficult when it seems like it's the only thing.

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Sarah Dessen

Hollis " I said "you're messing with me right now aren't you You're in Paris or somewhere and just-" "What " he replied. "No This is the real deal. Here I'll prove it." There was a muffled noise followed...

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Sarah Dessen

My point is you're different here. Hollis I've only been here for a month. A lot can happen in a month he replied. Shoot in two weeks I met my future wife changed my entire life's trajectory and bought...

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Sarah Dessen

Odd how it was so easy for a stranger to assume such familiarity. Especially when those who were supposed to know you best often didn't, not at all.

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Sarah Dessen

He always did the leaving. But not this time. She kept walking, and did not look back.

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Sarah Dessen

No one could tell you: you just had to go through it on your own. If you were lucky, you came out on the other side and understood. If you didn't, you kept getting thrust back, retracing those steps, until...

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Sarah Dessen

It was like reaching for someone's hand, then missing their fingers, or even their arm, and hitting their shoulder instead. But no matter. You hang on tight anyway.

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Sarah Dessen

You bought me some forks. And knives. And spoons. Because you love me!

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe" she said. "I just wish we'd have a little mishap.It would be reassuring

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Sarah Dessen

So he didn't have to prove how he felt about me. Like so much else, I should just know.

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Sarah Dessen

I’d only met him once, at the mall. He was tall, with a big floppy shock of blond hair he was always getting out of his face by jerking his head suddenly to the side, whiplash-style. Rina found this...

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Sarah Dessen

Macy: “In Truth,” I said, “there are no rules other than you have to tell the truth.” Wes: “How do you win?” he asked Macy: “That,” I said, “is such a boy question.

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Sarah Dessen

Nate: “And,” he said, “boys at twelve aren’t exactly slick with the ladies.” Ruby: “’Slick with the ladies’?” I said. “Are you twelve?

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Sarah Dessen

Macon: “It’s true. And if that doesn’t work, use the Jedi Mind Trick. But only if you really have to.” Halley: “The what?” Macon: “The Jedi Mind Trick.” He looked at me. “Didn’t you...

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Sarah Dessen

She said writting novels was like childbirth: if you truly remembered how awful it got, you'd never do it again.

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Sarah Dessen

This Lullaby is only a few words, a simple run of chords, quiet here in this spare room, but you can hear it, hear it, wherever you may go, even if I let you down, this lullaby plays on...

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Sarah Dessen

Donneven, Bettaquit and Mmmhmmmm

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Sarah Dessen

Believe in yourself up here and it will make you stronger than you could ever imagine.

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Sarah Dessen

I don't believe in failure, because simply by saying you've failed, you've admitted you attempted. And anyone who attempts is not a failure. Those who truly fail in my eyes are the ones who never try at...

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Sarah Dessen

Wake up, Caitlin, Mr. Lensing had said. But what he didn't under­stand was that this dreamland was preferable, walking through this life half-sleeping, everything at arm's length or farther away.

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Sarah Dessen

I don't think anyone would think that an ellipsis represents doubt or anything. I think it's more, you know, hinting at the future. What lies ahead.

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Sarah Dessen

Wes wants to be with Macy. And Macy, whether she'll admit it or not, wants to be with Wes. And yet they're not together, which is not only unjust, but when you think about it, tragical!

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Sarah Dessen

Accepting all the good and bad about someone. It's a great thing to aspire to. The hard part is actually doing it.

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Sarah Dessen

Music is the great uniter. An incredible force. Something that people who differ on everything and anything else can have in common.

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Sarah Dessen

Okay," he said. He took a breath. "What would you do, if you could do anything?" I took a step toward him, closing the space between us. "This." I said. And then I kissed him.

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Sarah Dessen

Like a word on a page that you’ve printed and read a million times, that suddenly looks strange or wrong, foreign. And you feel scared for a second, like you’ve lost something, even if you’re not...

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Sarah Dessen

This is the problem with dealing with someone who is actually a good listener. They don’t jump in on your sentences, saving you from actually finishing them, or talk over you, allowing what you do manage...

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Sarah Dessen

What you need, what you deserve, is a guy who adores you for what you are. Who doesn't see you as a project, but a prize. you know?

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Sarah Dessen

And that was it. All this buildup to a great leap, and I didn't fall or fly. Instead I found myself back on the edge of the cliff, blinking, wondering if I'd ever jumped at all. It's not supposed to be...

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Sarah Dessen

At every wedding someone stays home.

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Sarah Dessen

Pretend to be a delinquent?" I asked clarifying. "You can do it," Dave advised me. "Just don't smile, and try to look like you're considering stealing something.

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Sarah Dessen

Shoulda, coulda, woulda. It's so easy in the past tense.

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Sarah Dessen

I have to admit, an unrequited love is so much better than a real one. I mean, it's perfect... As long as something is never even started, you never have to worry about it ending. It has endless potential.

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Sarah Dessen

One open, one closed. It was no wonder that the first image that came to mind when I thought of either of my sisters was a door. With Kirsten, it was the front one to our house, through which she was always...

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Sarah Dessen

So I learned another system: When in doubt, keep it out – out of earshot, out of the house – even if this meant, really, just keeping it in.

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Sarah Dessen

Not for the first time, I wished both of us could just say what we meant. But that, like so much else, was impossible

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Sarah Dessen

It is kind of hard to hold a lot in. But for me… it’s sometimes even harder to let it out.

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Sarah Dessen

but you could also look at it the other way. Like you’re saying no matter how bad things are for you, I can still relate.

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Sarah Dessen

Really? Screaming?” He shrugged. “It wasn’t that bad. But there were definitely some freak-outs on both sides. Though, to be honest, the silence was worse.” “Worse than screaming?” I said....

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Sarah Dessen

Whether it was a song, a person, or a story, there was a lot you couldn’t know from just an excerpt, a glance, or part of a chorus.

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Sarah Dessen

I wanted to tell him so. Find the right words, string them together in the ideal way, knowing that here they would have the best chance of sounding perfect.

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Sarah Dessen

There was no short answer to this; like so much else, it was a long story. But what really makes any story real is knowing someone will hear it. And understand.

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Sarah Dessen

This was how I was dealing with everyone and everything lately, taking the good when it came, and the bad the same way, knowing each would pass in its own time.

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Sarah Dessen

The truth was I knew, after all those flat January days, that I deserved better. I deserved I love yous and kiwi fruits and warriors coming to my door, besotted with love. I deserved pictures of my face...

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Sarah Dessen

How ballsy it was to just assume you know, with one glance, the things another person could live without. As if it was the same for everyone, that simple.

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Sarah Dessen

It's only advice. Ignore it if you want.

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Sarah Dessen

I had to wonder whether it was possible that this wasn’t already decided for me, and if maybe, just maybe, this was my one last chance to try and prove it. There was no way to know. There never is. But...

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Sarah Dessen

When someone starts to change, and it’s obvious, it's sort of natural to wonder why. Right?

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Sarah Dessen

It wasn’t so much that I was positive. I just wasn’t fully subscribing to such a negative way of thinking anymore.

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Sarah Dessen

I wasn’t ready to think about the other yet: that it wasn’t that I wasn’t right for Macon, but that maybe he wasn’t right for me. There was a difference. Even for someone who things didn’t come...

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Sarah Dessen

I wasn't ready for this, but then I probably never would be, and this year, like so much else, wouldn't wait. I had no choice but to get out of my car, with everyone watching and begin in earnest, alone....

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Sarah Dessen

I didn't want to talk about what happened, so it seemed safest not to talk at all.

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Sarah Dessen

Life isn't fair," Owen told her. "Get used to it.

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Sarah Dessen

If you were dead," Owen told her, "you'd have bigger problems than what you were wearing.

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Sarah Dessen

It's a choice, Annabel. And if you make the wrong one, you have only yourself to blame when there are consequences.

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Sarah Dessen

Told you. Everything sounds better in the car wash.

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Sarah Dessen

It's a funny feeling, being suddenly airborne. Just as you realize it, it's over, and you're sinking.

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Sarah Dessen

People get mad Annabel. Its not the end of the world.

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Sarah Dessen

You punched him by accident.

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Sarah Dessen

You know, when you think about it, that’s kind of a weird thing. I mean it’s meant to be sympathetic, right? But it’s kind of not. Like you’re telling the person there’s nothing unique about...

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Sarah Dessen

Even if you couldn't see it beneath the surface, molecules were bonding, energy pushing up slowly, as something worked do hare, all alone to grow.

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Sarah Dessen

How it seemed like you could see everything, but certain things were blocked out, hidden.

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Sarah Dessen

This is personal, she'd said. Real. This moment was too, even if you couldn't see it at first glance. It was fake on the outside, but so true within. You only had to look, really look to tell.

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Sarah Dessen

It hadn't even occured to me that somebody would believe mine.

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Sarah Dessen

But those words were only the middle of the story. There was a beginning here, too.

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Sarah Dessen

I just do the best I can under the circumstances.

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Sarah Dessen

Honesty in principle was one thing. In someone’s face, it was another.

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Sarah Dessen

Grief can be a burden, but also an anchor. You get used to the weight, how it holds you in place.

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Sarah Dessen

You know, I think I knew you for about three weeks before I ever really saw you smile. And then one day, Morgan said something and you laughed, and I remember thinking it was really cool because it meant...

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Sarah Dessen

for once, you believed in yourself. you believed you were beautiful and so did the rest of the world.

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Sarah Dessen

It's true. It's like the hidden secret that no one tells you. we can all be beautiful girls, Colie. it's so easy. it's like Dorothy clicking her heels to go home. You could do it all along.

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Sarah Dessen

Holding people away from you, and denying yourself love, that doesn't make you strong. if anything, it makes you weaker. Because you're doing it out of fear.

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Sarah Dessen

The chances we take, knowing no better than to fall or to stand back and hold ourselves in... protecting our hearts with the tightest of grips.

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Sarah Dessen

There was only so much space between us, not even a real distance if measured in miles or feet or even inches, all the things that told you how far you'd come or had left to go. But it was a big space,...

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Sarah Dessen

And so, while the rest of the world went on unaware, drinking their coffee, reading the sports page, and picking up their dry cleaning, I leaned forward and kissed Dexter, making a choice that would change...

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Sarah Dessen

Don't give me no rotten tomato, 'cause all I ever wanted was your sweet potato.

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Sarah Dessen

I was running from one problem or place to another, with no time left to study, or sleep, or just breathe. I felt pulled in all directions, fighting to keep all these obligations circling in the air above...

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Sarah Dessen

It's a big deal when you finally get the chance to do the one thing you want to do -need to do- more than anything. It can kind of scare the crap out of you.

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Sarah Dessen

Like so many before them, they didn't care that my dad was only the messenger. They still wanted to shoot him.

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Sarah Dessen

Some people, they can't just move on, you know, mourn and cry and be done with it. Or at least seem to be. But for me... I don't know. I didn't want to fix it, to forget. It wasn't something that was broken....

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Sarah Dessen

Their words, like the music, had the potential to be endless.

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Sarah Dessen

If something doesn't work exactly right, or maybe needs some special treatment, you don't just throw it away. Everything can't be fully operational all the time. Sometimes, we need to have the patience...

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Sarah Dessen

See, Colie, it's all about understanding. We're all worth something.

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Sarah Dessen

After the group vet appointment--during which Lyle scratched the vet, the vet tech, and some poor woman minding her own business in the waiting room--we went back to Sabrina's and re-released the cats...

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Sarah Dessen

But God!Who could live like this , anyway, with the kind of guesswork that was enough to make a person crazy, just sailing along, taking bumps here and there, no course navigated whatsoever, with any big...

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Sarah Dessen

The fate of your heart is your choice and no one else gets a vote

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Sarah Dessen

Love is so unpredictable. That's what makes it so great.

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Sarah Dessen

Are those the only options? Nothing or forever?

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Sarah Dessen

I've seen what commitment leads to. Going in is the easy part. It's the ending that sucks! -Remy

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Sarah Dessen

That was the hard thing about grief, and the grieving. They spoke another language, and the words we knew always fell short of what we wanted them to say.

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Sarah Dessen

Well, it's New Year's now but I don't feel that way anymore. I wonder if you do either. Something's happening to me. It's like I'm shrinking smaller and smaller and I can't stp it. There's just os much...

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Sarah Dessen

I jammed my hand in my jacket pocket, bracing myself fo the next hit, and fel something. Something grainy and samll, sticking to the tips of my fingers: the sand from Commons Park. Oh Cass, I thought....

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Sarah Dessen

And that was as far as he got before i heard it. The thumping of footsteps, running up the lawn toward me: It seemed like I could hear it through the grass, like leaning your ear to a railroad track and...

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Sarah Dessen

What was the name of Pygmalion's sister?" She blinked, twice, obviously surprised. "Ummm," she said, keeping her eyes on me. "I don't know." Rogerson did," I told her. "Rogerson knew everything.

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Sarah Dessen

I don't know. Just because someone's pretty doesn't mean she's decent. Or vice versa. I'm not into appearances. I like flaws, I think they make things interesting.

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Sarah Dessen

You know, feeling and action are always linked, one can't exist without the other. It's sort of a hippie thing.-Wes

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Sarah Dessen

An empty frame, in which the picture is always changing, makes a statement about how time is always passing. It doesn't really stop, even in a single image. I t just feels that way.

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Sarah Dessen

A thump thump thump noise that was so unfamiliar, and yet I couldn't quite place it. But I knew it. It was---"Mmm-hmmm," Monica murmured, just as Wes came view into the path. He was running, his pace quick...

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Sarah Dessen

You, have this whole tall, dark stranger thing going on. Not to mention the tortured artist bit. And you, have that whole blonde cool and collected perfect smart thing going on. You're the boy all the...

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Sarah Dessen

Your actions is like a raindrop; it falls into the pond making ripples and then its over...

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Sarah Dessen

So you should remember that, when you're thinking about what other people can deal with. Maybe it's not so bad.

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Sarah Dessen

The choices you make now, the people you surround yourself with, they all have the potential to affect your life, even who you are, forever.

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Sarah Dessen

So," he said as we turned onto the main road, the muffler rattling, "I've been thinking." "Yeah?" He nodded. "You really need to go out with me." I blinked. "I'm sorry?" "You know. You, me. A restaurant...

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Sarah Dessen

Look, the point is there's no way to be a hundred percent sure about anyone or anything. So you're left with a choice. Either hope for the best or just expect the worst.

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Sarah Dessen

What you have to decide... is how you want your life to be. If your forever was ending tomorrow, would this be how you'd want to have spent it? Listen, the truth is, nothing is guaranteed. You know that...

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Sarah Dessen

All I'd wanted for so long was for someone to explain everything that had happened to me in this same way. To label it neatly on a page: this leads to this leads to this.

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Sarah Dessen

It was becoming clear to me that I shouldn't bother to get too attached to anything. Turn your back and you lose it. Just like that.

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Sarah Dessen

None of it meant anything, and all of it was important.

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Sarah Dessen

This was our common ground, the secret we shared but never spoke aloud. I should have been with him; she should have left him alone. Shoulda, coulda, woulda. It's so easy in the past tense.

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Sarah Dessen

Like life isn't complicated enough. You should at least be able to follow the signs.

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Sarah Dessen

The thing about Wes," Delia said to me, unwrapping another package of turkey, "is that he thinks he can fix anything. And if he can't fix it, he can at least do something with the pieces of what's broken.

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Sarah Dessen

The way I see it," she continued, "is that some things are just meant to be the way they are.

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Sarah Dessen

The silence wasn't like the ones I'd known lately, though: it wasn't empty as much as chosen. There's a entirely different feel to quiet when you're with some-one else, and at any moment it could be broken....

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Sarah Dessen

I'd chosen instead to just change my route, go miles out of the way, as if avoiding it would make it go away once and for all.

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Sarah Dessen

It's nice to have options even if you can't take them.

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Sarah Dessen

No," I snapped. "I mean, no. I'm answering. I'm just collecting my response." Another few seconds passed. Is there a time limit for this?" he asked. I shot him a look. "Just wondering.

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Sarah Dessen

There was no way to take the story back, folding it neatly into the place I'd kept it all this time. No matter what else happened, from here on out, I would always remember Wes, because with this telling,...

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Sarah Dessen

Once, she'd been a pro at decompressing, loved to sit on the back deck of the beach house in one of our splintery Adirondack chairs for hours at a time, staring at the ocean. She never had a book or the...

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Sarah Dessen

When he first put his arms around me, it was tentative, like maybe he expected I'd pull away. When I didn't, he moved in closer, his hands smoothing over my shoulders, and in my mind I saw myself retreating...

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Sarah Dessen

During the long stretches of quiet two-lane highway, with the sun setting in the distance, it was somehow easier to say things aloud, and regardless of what was said, we just kept moving toward that horizon.

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Sarah Dessen

Was it really this easy, once you escaped, to just not care?

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Sarah Dessen

But it was important to simply be sought, even if you didn‟t ever want to be found.

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Sarah Dessen

but accepting help doesn‟t have to mean giving up control.

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Sarah Dessen

I just stood there, looking at her. My head was spinning, my mouth dry, and all I could think about was that I wanted to go someplace safe, someplace I could be alone and okay, and that this was impossible....

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Sarah Dessen

Sure, there was no guarantee any of these things would actually happen as he envisioned. But maybe that wasn‟t the point.It was the planning that counted, whether it ever came to fruition or not.

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Sarah Dessen

There was something striking about a single key. It was like a question waiting to be answered, a whole missing a half. Useless on its own, needing something else to be truly defined.

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Sarah Dessen

Sometimes. It was a good escape. Until, you know, it wasn‟t.

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Sarah Dessen

You just had to know where to look.

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Sarah Dessen

There were so many levels to the unknown, from safe to dangerous to outright nebulous, scariest of all.

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Sarah Dessen

After everything that happened, how could I miss him? But I did, I did.

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe I'd just figured out there were some things you were better off not knowing

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Sarah Dessen

But the original was there as well—more jaded and rudimentary, functional rather than romantic. It fit not just the yellow house but another door, deep within my own heart. One that had been locked so...

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Sarah Dessen

If this was my instinct talking, I didn‟t want to hear what it was saying.

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Sarah Dessen

How do you even begin to return to someone, much less convince them to do the same for you? I had no idea. More than ever, though, right then I had to believe the answer would just come to me.

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Sarah Dessen

Even if you do make tons of new friends,” I told him, “try not to forget where you came from, okay?

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Sarah Dessen

I hoped this was true. Even if it wasn‟t, all I could do was hand over what I could, with the hope of something in return. But of course, this was easier said than done.

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Sarah Dessen

If nothing else, now we knew where to find each other, even if only time would tell if either of us would ever come looking.

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Sarah Dessen

closed my eyes and listened. It was like music I'd heard all my life, even more than "This Lullaby." All those keystrokes, all those letters, so many words. I brushed my fingers over the beads and watched...

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Sarah Dessen

Just me and the future, finally together. Now there was a happy ending I could believe in.

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Sarah Dessen

So what do you wear to dump somebody?" she asked me, twirling a lock of hair around one finger. "Black, for mourning? Or something cheerful and colorful, to distract them from their pain? Or maybe you...

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Sarah Dessen

He's getting dumped. And he doesn't even know it yet. He's probably eating a cheeseburger or flossing or picking up his dry cleaning, and he has no idea. No inkling.

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Sarah Dessen

Yes, it sucked getting dumped. But wasn't it better to just be brutally honest? To admit that your feeling for someone is never going to be powerful enough to justify taking up any more of their time?...

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Sarah Dessen

That was the nice thing about the Spot: you could hear everything, but no one could see you.

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Sarah Dessen

I eased back on my elbows, tilting my head back to look up at the sky, which was pinkish, streaked with red. This was the time we knew best, that stretch of day going from dusk to dark. It seemed like...

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Sarah Dessen

The lizard stared up at us, and we stared back, taking each other in. He was little and defenseless, I felt sorry for him already. This was a screwed-up place he'd just come into. But he didn't have to...

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Sarah Dessen

But I always worked harder when I was up against something, or when someone assumed I couldn't succeed. That's what drove me, all those nights studying. The fact that so many figured I couldn't do it.

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Sarah Dessen

It passed, though. That was the bad thing. It always passed.

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Sarah Dessen

In a way, I was almost happy to see her. The worst part of me, out in the flesh. Blinking back at me in the dim light, daring me to call her a name other than my own.

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Sarah Dessen

n the dark everyone felt the same: the edges blurred. When I think of myself then, what I was like two years ago, I feel like a wound in a bad place, prone to be bumped on corners or edges. Never able...

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Sarah Dessen

I didn't trot my pain out to show around. I kept it better hidden than anyone. I did.

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Sarah Dessen

It seemed like this day could go in so many directions, like a spiderweb shooting out toward endless possibilities.

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Sarah Dessen

Her life was perfect. But as was often the case, the rest of us were still adjusting.

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Sarah Dessen

Once, I was easy. Now, I was choosy. See? Big difference.

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Sarah Dessen

One word," Ted replied, dead serious, "can change the whole world." There was a moment while we all considered this. Finally Lissa said to Chloe, loud enough for all of us to hear (she'd had a minibottle...

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Sarah Dessen

It was a basic plot in any number of her books: girl strikes out, makes good, finds love, gets revenge. In that order. The making good and striking out part I liked. The rest would just be bonus.

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Sarah Dessen

As if he was beating me to the punch, his words living forever, while I was left speechless, no rebuttal, no words left to say.

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Sarah Dessen

I'd seen another shade of him, and if it had been light where we were now, he'd have seen the same of me. So I was grateful, as I had been so often in my life, for the dark.

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Sarah Dessen

As if at the age of eighteen life already sucked beyond any hope of improvement.

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Sarah Dessen

I planned my whole future around Adam," she said now, quietly. "And now I have nothing." "No," I told her, "now you just don't have Adam. There's a big difference, Lissa. You just can't see it yet.

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Sarah Dessen

So," she went on, "it got me thinking about what cost beauty. Or for that matter, what cost anything? Would you trade love for beauty? Or happiness for beauty? Could a gorgeous person with a mean streak...

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Sarah Dessen

I should have told you from the start. I will let you down.

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Sarah Dessen

I knew this feeling, the 2 a.m. loneliness that I'd practically invented.

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Sarah Dessen

Welcome to adulthood," she said. "It sucks as much as high school.

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Sarah Dessen

Despite our differences, we did have a history. No one understood where I was coming from the way he did.

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Sarah Dessen

But it was too early to know: there were always more pages to go, more words to be written, before the story was over.

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Sarah Dessen

But even more so, it reminded me that this was all really happening. Stanford. The end of the summer. The beginning of my real life. It was no longer just creeping up, peeking over the horizon, but instead...

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Sarah Dessen

Times like this it did seem real I was leaving, and even more that my family, and this life, would go on without me. And again I felt that emptiness rise up, but pushed it away. Still, I lingered there,...

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe, you just misplaced it, you know? It's been there. But you just haven't been looking in the right spot. Because lost means forever, it's gone. But misplaced... that means it's still around, somewhere....

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Sarah Dessen

I drove off, with my friends watching me go, all of them grouped on Lissa's hood. As I pulled onto the road, I glanced into the rearview and saw them: they were waving, hands moving through the air, their...

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Sarah Dessen

I was heading off to my new world. But I was taking a part of my past, and the future, along with me for the ride.

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Sarah Dessen

Failing sucks. But it's better than the alternative." "Which is?" "Not even trying." Now he did look at me, straight on. "Life's short, you know?

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Sarah Dessen

Being brave and self-confident doesn't necessarily start inside...It starts with the rest of the world, and it leads back to you.

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Sarah Dessen

That's not a real answer.' Says who?' Says me. I mean real fear, like of failure, of death, of regret. Like that. Something that keeps you awake nights, questioning your very existence.' Clowns.

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Sarah Dessen

But if something was really important, fate made sure it somehow came back to you and gave you another chance.

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Sarah Dessen

It was kind of soothing, these sounds of lives being lived all around me, for better or for worse. And there I was, in the middle of them all, newly reborn and still waiting for mine to begin.

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Sarah Dessen

Like a blinking cursor on an empty page, it was just the first thing. The beginning of the beginning. But at least it was done.

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Sarah Dessen

The girl in the tight black dress was passing by us now, eyeing Wes and walking entirely too slowly. "Hi," she said, and he nodded at her but didn't reply. Knew it, I thought. Honestly," I said. What?"...

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Sarah Dessen

Together, we looked down at the tiny house, the sole thing on this vast, flat surface. Like the only person living on the moon. It could be either lonely or peaceful, depending on how you looked at it....

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Sarah Dessen

All those clean, fresh starts had made me forget what it was like, until now, to be messy and honest and out of control. To be real.

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Sarah Dessen

How it felt to have the world moving beneath me, a hand gripping mine, knowing if I fell, at least I wouldn't do it alone.

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Sarah Dessen

Let's just start and see what happens.

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Sarah Dessen

It wasn't about being happy or unhappy. I just didn't want to be me anymore.

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Sarah Dessen

I had stepped into his arms, showing him my raw, broken heart.

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Sarah Dessen

That was the thing. You just never knew. Forever was so many different things. It was always changing, it was what everything was really all about.

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Sarah Dessen

She fell, she hurt, she felt. She lived. And for all the tumble of her experiences, she still had hope. Maybe this next time would do the trick. Or maybe not. But unless you stepped into the game, you...

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Sarah Dessen

But I saw Blake earlier and he said he and Nate were taking off for an overnight business thing. So..." "... you're just going to jump their fence and their pool," I finished for her. Silence. Then Jamie...

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Sarah Dessen

Society. The same society, I might add, that dictates that little girls should always be sugar and spice and everything nice, which encourages them not to be assertive. And that, in turn, then leads to...

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Sarah Dessen

Why does she have wings?' So she can fly.

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Sarah Dessen

Who says there has to be a point?" He asked. "Or a reason. Maybe it's just something you have to do.

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Sarah Dessen

Friends are honest with each other. Even if the truth hurts. -Maggie

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Sarah Dessen

Relationships dont always make sense. Especially from the outside

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Sarah Dessen

But sometimes you lose. Nothing you can do but admit it. -Eli

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Sarah Dessen

Life is full of screwups. You're supposed to fail sometimes. It's a required part of the human existance.

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Sarah Dessen

An ending was an ending. No matter how many pages of sentences and paragraphs of great stories led up to it, it would always have the last word.

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Sarah Dessen

It shouldn't be easy to be amazing. Then everything would be. It's the things you fight for and struggle with before earning that have the greatest worth. When something's difficult to come by, you'll...

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Sarah Dessen

It didn't make you noble to step away from something that wasn't working, even if you thought you were the reason for the malfunction. Especially then. It just made you a quitter. Because if you were the...

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Sarah Dessen

The basic fact is that no, this isnt ideal. Very few things are. Sometimes, you have to manufacture your own history. Give fate a push,so to speak. -Heidi

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Sarah Dessen

So maybe it wasn't the fairy tale. But those stories weren't real anyway. Mine were.

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Sarah Dessen

You couldn't just pick and choose at will when someone depended on you, or loved you. It wasn't like a light switch, easy to turn on or off. If you were in, you were in. Out, you were out.

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Sarah Dessen

As for me, I was just trying to get it right, whatever that means. But now I finally felt I was on my way. Everyone had a forever, but given a choice, this would be mine. The one that began in this moment,...

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Sarah Dessen

D.C., Baltimore, Philadelphia, Austin... and you. I'll be there soon.

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe marriage, like life, is'nt only about the big moments, whether they be good or bad. Maybe it's all the small things—like being guided slowly forward, surely, day after day—that stretches out...

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe it was true, and being a girl could be about interest rates and skinny jeans, riding bikes and wearing pink. Not about any one thing, but everything.

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Sarah Dessen

talk was cheap and useless. Action was what mattered. And me, I was moving. Now, again, always.

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Sarah Dessen

He was not my boyfriend. On the other hand, he wasn't just a friend either. Instead, our relationship was elastic, stretching between those two extremes depending on who else was around, how much either...

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Sarah Dessen

Because you can never go from going out to being friends, just like that. It's a lie. It's just something that people say they'll do to take the permanence out of a breakup. And someone always takes it...

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Sarah Dessen

After all, it's all kinds of things that make up a life, right? The big, like falling in love and spending time with your family, and the little....like blow drying your hair, applying concealer, and cursing...

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Sarah Dessen

It was so easy to disown what you couldn't recognize, to keep yourself apart from things that were foreign and unsettling. The only person you can be sure to control, always, is yourself. Which is a lot...

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Sarah Dessen

Lissa lowered her voice and added, "I might not even go to school anyway. I might defer and join the Peace Corps and go to Africa and shave my head and dig latrines." "Shave your head?" I said, because,...

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Sarah Dessen

Because you have to just go with the flow. Your life is not your own, with people coming in and out all the time. You get mellow because you have to.

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Sarah Dessen

When I pictured myself, it was always like just an outline in a colouring book, with the inside not yet completed.

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Sarah Dessen

If what you're asking is how I debated whether or not to love her the answer is I didn't. Not at all. It just happened. I didn't ever question it; by the time I realized what was happening, it was already...

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Sarah Dessen

I wondered if emotions were like menstrual cycles, if you get enough women together. Give it time, and everyone was crying.

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe we were all destined to just keep doing the same stupid things, over and over again, never really learning a single thing.

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Sarah Dessen

Oh darling, don't be bitter. It's the first instinct of the weak.

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Sarah Dessen

That first love. And the first one who breaks your heart. For me, they just happen to be the same person.

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Sarah Dessen

When you don't know where you're going, maybe it wasn't such a bad thing to have more than you need.

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Sarah Dessen

call it chicken salad

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Sarah Dessen

Really, it had been stupid to expect anything anyway. A few late nights does not a habit, or a relationship, make.

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Sarah Dessen

Life shouldn't be about the either/or. We're capable of more than that, you know?

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Sarah Dessen

Impulsiveness can be charming but deliberation can have an appeal, as well.

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Sarah Dessen

In Anger Management,' he said,'we had to do all this role-playing stuff. You know, to get used to handling things in a less volatile way.' 'You role-played,' I said, trying to picture this. 'I had to....

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Sarah Dessen

So say I’m your mom.' 'What?' I said. 'I’m your mom,' he repeated. 'Now tell me you want to quit modeling.' I could feel myself blushing. 'I can’t do that,' I said. 'Why not?' he asked. 'Is it so...

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Sarah Dessen

There's a kind of radar that you get, after years of being talked about and made fun of by other people. You can almost smell it when it's about to happen, can recognize instantly the sound of a hushed...

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Sarah Dessen

As Isabel acted out her date, both of them laughing, I stayed in the kitchen, out of sight, and pretended she was telling me, too. And that, for once, I was part of this hidden language of laughter and...

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Sarah Dessen

Sometimes, you get things right the first time. Others, the second. But the third time, they say, is the charm.

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Sarah Dessen

It was like discovering that some part of you wasn't yours at all. And it made me wonder what else I couldn't claim.

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Sarah Dessen

Once I turned eighteen, I could cut myself off from everyone and finally get what I wanted, which was to be on my own, once and for all. ~Ruby, pg 38

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Sarah Dessen

A lot can change between planning something and actually doing it. But maybe all that really matters is that anything is different at all.

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Sarah Dessen

And the rest is history,' I said. Nah.' He shook his head. 'The rest is now.

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Sarah Dessen

Leaving was easy. It was everything else that was so damned hard.

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Sarah Dessen

There was nothing, nothing to depend on. And why was I surprised?

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Sarah Dessen

You get what you give, but also what you're willing to take. The night before, I'd offered up my hand. Now, if I held on, there was no telling what it was possible to recieve in return.

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Sarah Dessen

Sitting there with them, it was almost hard to remember when I first came to Perkins, so determined to remember to be a one-woman operation to the end. But that was the thing about taking help and giving...

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Sarah Dessen

Conciseness is underrated

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Sarah Dessen

We both know the limits of this relationship. It's understood. And as long as we're both comfortablewith that, nobody get's hurt. It's basic.' ~Oliva, pg 374

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Sarah Dessen

The point,' Ms. Conyers continued, "is that no word had one specific definition. Maybe in the dictionary, but not in real life.

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Sarah Dessen

She smiled, pulling the photo a little closer, and I wondered if I should ask her, too, the question for my project, get her definition. But as she ran a finger slowly across the faces, identifying each...

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Sarah Dessen

As far as I was concerned, we'd come to a draw: I hadn't wanted to come, and she didn't want me to leave. We were even. But I knew my mother wouldn't see it that way. Lately, we didn't seem to see anything...

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Sarah Dessen

When I pictured myself, it was always like just an outline in a coloring book, with the inside not yet completed. All the standard features were there. but the colors, the zigzags and plaids, the bits...

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Sarah Dessen

I've given lots of people chances," she said suddenly, as if Marion was still in the room to hear us. "But there's only so much faith you can have in people.

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Sarah Dessen

I knew I had to keep him to myself, as I'd slowly begun to keep everything. We had secrets now, truths and half-truths, that kept her always at arm's length, behind a closed door, miles away.

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Sarah Dessen

Just like that, with one phone call, she was a daughter again.

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Sarah Dessen

And that was it; it was so easy for her. My own memories did not even belong to me. But I knew she was wrong. I had seen that comet. I knew it as well as I knew my own face, my own hands. My own heart.

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Sarah Dessen

You can't just turn your heart off like a faucet; you have to go to the source and dry it out, drop by drop.

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Sarah Dessen

You can't just plan a moment when things get back on track, just as you can't plan the moment you lose your way in the first place. But standing there alone on the landing, I thought of Grandma Halley...

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Sarah Dessen

I watched my mother do what she did best, and realized there would never be a way to cut myself from her entirely. No matter how strong or weak I was, she was a part of me, as crucial as my own heart....

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Sarah Dessen

How weird was it that so many bits and pieces, all diverse, could make something whole. Something with potential. 'Perfect.

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Sarah Dessen

He was looking at me, jsut as I'd thought he would be, but like Bert's, his light was not what I expected. No pity, no sadness: nothing had changed. I realized all the times I'd felt people stare at me,...

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Sarah Dessen

This was always the problem with my mother and me, I suddenly realized. There were so many things we thought we agreed on, but anythign can have two meanings. Like sides of a coin, it just matters how...

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Sarah Dessen

The world is speaking to you every day, you just don't know how to listen.

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Sarah Dessen

People don't change. If anything, you get more set in your ways as you get older, not less

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Sarah Dessen

It was so weird, because usually I was totally nervous talking to guys. But Eli was different. He made me want to say more, not less. Which was maybe not a good thing.

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Sarah Dessen

But it was okay not to fit in everywhere, as long as you did somewhere.

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Sarah Dessen

But she wouldn't. I knew that already. My mother and I had an understanding: we worked together to be as much in control of our shared world as possible. I was suposed to be her other half, carrying my...

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Sarah Dessen

I got back in my car, starting the engine, then drove off. It wasn't until I pulled onto the highway that it all really sunk it, how temporary our friendship had been. We'd been on our breaks, after all,...

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Sarah Dessen

It's not forever', she'd said, but to my mother, it might as well have been. She had make her choice, and this was it, where she felt safe, in a world she could, for the most part, control.

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Sarah Dessen

I listened for the voice I knew so well, the one I always heard at the beginning. Good girl, Macy! You're doing great! You know the first steps are the hardest part! They were. Sometimes I felt so out...

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Sarah Dessen

I wasn't sure what I expected her to do or say to this. It was all new to me from that second on. But clearly, she'd been there before. It was obvious in the easy way she shrugged off her bag, letting...

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Sarah Dessen

I wondered if he ever thought of me, and hated the pang I felt when I told myself he didn't.

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Sarah Dessen

I was born in 1970 in Illinois, but all the life I remember I've spent in Chapel Hill, N.C.

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Sarah Dessen

I'm always hopeful. I feel like I'm at the prom sitting against the wall waiting for someone to ask me to dance.

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Sarah Dessen

But all the love in the world won't save a sinking ship. You have to either bail or jump overboard.

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Sarah Dessen

Says the girl with no thyme.

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Sarah Dessen

Grieving doesn't make you imperfect. It makes you human.

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Sarah Dessen

Whenever something great happens, you’re always kind of poised for the universe to correct itself.

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Sarah Dessen

All we had was her room, her stories, and the quiet that settled in as we tried in vain to spread ourselves out and fill the space she'd left behind.

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Sarah Dessen

Once she'd loved my filet mignon, my carnivore inklings, but now she was a vegan princess, living off of beans. She'd given up the cheese and bacon, sworn off Burger King, and when I wouldn't do the same...

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Sarah Dessen

Fifteen minutes later, a meeting was called. "Okay, look." Deb's face was dead serious. "I know I just joined this project, and I don't want to offend anyone. But I'm going to be honest. I think you've...

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Sarah Dessen

She was so emotional, on the verge of tears. This was what I'd wanted to prevent with all those quick disappearances, the tangledness of farewells and all the baggage they brought with them. But now, looking...

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Sarah Dessen

Because' I repeated, as a breeze blew over us, "sometimes things just happen. That aren't expected. Or on the list." "Such as?" he asked "I don't know," I said, frustrated. "That's the point. It would...

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Sarah Dessen

It took a lot of work to be perfect.

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Sarah Dessen

And I felt comfort. Finally. All I'd wanted for so long was for someone to explain everything that had happened to me in this same way. To label it neatly on a page: this leads to this leads to this. I...

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Sarah Dessen

This was our common ground, the secret we shared but never spoke aloud.

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Sarah Dessen

Then I'd crawl back into bed, smelling her all around me, and tell myself that next time, I would lock that window. But I never did.

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Sarah Dessen

Who knew three dots could make such a difference? Like everything else, a love or a wish or whatever, it was all in the way you read it.

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Sarah Dessen

If there was a way to recognize something you'd never seen but still knew by heart, I felt it as I looked at his face. Finally, someone understood.

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Sarah Dessen

You should have seen your face," she said, her breath hot in my ear. "Sa-woooon.

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Sarah Dessen

I turned and looked into the gas station, where Wes was now paying, as the man who'd driven us looked on. "That's too bad," I said. "It's okay, though," she assured me. "Someday I'll show you an extraordinary...

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Sarah Dessen

I know you guys have some sort of weird thing going on, with that game you play and everything—" "It's called a friendship.

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Sarah Dessen

This felt right. Not just leaving, but how I was doing it. Without regret, without second guessing. And with Wes right there, holding the door open for me as I walked out into the light.

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Sarah Dessen

That was the thing about being alone, in theory or in principle. Whatever happened-good, bad, or anywhere in between-it was always, if nothing else, all your own.

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Sarah Dessen

She bought seeds and raided nurseries and mulched and composted and spent full days with her hands full of earth, coaxing life our of the dry, dull grass my father had spent years pushing a mower over.

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Sarah Dessen

I am the middle sister. The one in between. Not oldest, not youngest, not boldest, not nicest. I am the shade of gray, the glass half empty or full, depending on your view. In my life, there has been little...

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Sarah Dessen

Can she be divorced?" I asked. "And famous for her commercials and ideas?" She can be anything," Boo told me, and this is what I remember most, her freckled face so solemn, as if she knew she was the first...

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Sarah Dessen

the truth about forever is that it is happening right now

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Sarah Dessen

The worst thing you can do if you miss or need someone is let them know it.

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Sarah Dessen

You know the minute you stop thinking about it, it'll happen.

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Sarah Dessen

I have boobs!" Chloe said again, a bit too loudly— she'd already had a couple of mini bottles at the Spot. "My boobs are great, goddammit. You know that? They're fantastic! My boobs are amazing.

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Sarah Dessen

Well," I said finally, knowing he was waiting, "you make me laugh." He nodded. "And?" "You're pretty good-looking." "Pretty good-looking? I called you beautiful." "You want to be beautiful?" I asked him....

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Sarah Dessen

I looked at the sweatshirt again. "'You swim' is a philosophy?" He shrugged. "Better than 'you sink', right?

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Sarah Dessen

Whenever you made a choice, especially one you'd been resisting, it always affected everything else, some in big ways, like a tremor beneath your feet, others in so tiny a shift you hardly noticed a change...

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Sarah Dessen

You get what you give, but also what you're willing to take.

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Sarah Dessen

But you don’t have to give everyone the benefit of the doubt.” “You don’t have to assume the worst about everyone, either. The world isn’t always out to get you.

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Sarah Dessen

It's okay to accept things from people. It doesn't make you weak or helpless.

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Sarah Dessen

The best gifts come from the heart, not the store.

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Sarah Dessen

Look. We both know life is short, Macy. Too short to waste a single second with anyone who doesn't appreciate and value you." You said the other day life was long," I shot back. "Which is it?" It's both,"...

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Sarah Dessen

That was the thing about being on the inside: the world was just going on, even when it seemed like time for you had stopped for good.

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Sarah Dessen

Look at it this way: I might be saying you're fat, but at least I'm not punching you in the face.' Are those the only options?' Not always. Just sometimes.

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Sarah Dessen

I mean, at first, it was kind of disappointing. But people recover from disappointment. Otherwise we'd all be hanging from nooses. Right?

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Sarah Dessen

See for me, it’s immediate. Silence is so freaking loud.' This seemed either deep or deeply oxymoronic. I wasn’t sure which.

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Sarah Dessen

Nothing like being scolded by a hippie.

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Sarah Dessen

Self respect, Colie. If you don't have it, the world will walk all over you.

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Sarah Dessen

It's so, so stupid what we do to ourselves because we're afraid. It's so stupid.

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Sarah Dessen

All the bitchy girls in the world are just a training ground for what men can do to you.

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Sarah Dessen

I've always known who I am. I might not work perfectly, or be like them, but that's okay. I know I work in my own way.

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Sarah Dessen

You just looked..." she said, searching for the word, "taken, you know? Plus you hardly reacted to Wes. I mean, you did alittle, but nothing like most girls. It was a little swoon. Not a sa-woon, you know?"...

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Sarah Dessen

What were you two talking about?" she whispered as Wes pulls the door shut. Nothing," I said. "Running." You should have seen your face," she said, her breath hot in my ear. "Sa-woooon.

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Sarah Dessen

I took in a breath. "What's the one thing you'd do," I asked. "if you could do anything?" Pass," he said. For a second I was sure I'd heard wrong. "What?" He cleared his throat. "I said, I pass." Why?"...

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Sarah Dessen

Fall in love with someone who truly deserves your heart. Not with someone who plays with it.

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Sarah Dessen

I didn't want to leave things the way we had, unresolved, ... and tried to tell myself he cared about me enough not to look elsewhere for what I wasn't giving him.

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Sarah Dessen

Don't be a fool. Don't give up something important to hold onto someone who can't even say they love you.

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Sarah Dessen

He wasn't what I'd thought he was; maybe he never had been. I wasn't what I'd thought I was, either.

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Sarah Dessen

Why don't you ever wait a second and see what I'm planning, or thinking, before you burst in with your opinions and ideas? You never even give me a chance.

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Sarah Dessen

And I felt a sudden whirl in my head, knowing this leap was inevitable, that I wasn't just standing on the cliff, toes poking over, but already in mid-air.

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Sarah Dessen

You can't act like you care about someone but not let them care about you.

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Sarah Dessen

You're wrong," I told her. "I lost that faith a long time ago." She looked at me as I said this, an expression of quiet understanding on her face. "Maybe you didn't, though," she said softly. "Lose it,...

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Sarah Dessen

But something, somehow, had made all these paths converge. You couldn't find it on a checklist, or work it into the equation. It just happened.

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Sarah Dessen

How fast were you?" Wes asked me. I said, "Not that fast." "You mean you couldn't... fly?" he said, smiling at me.

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Sarah Dessen

Of course it hurts", she grumbled, tipping my head further back. "Life sucks. Get over it

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Sarah Dessen

The bottom line is, what defines you isn't how many times you crash, but the number of times you get back on the bike. As long as it's one more. you're all good.

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Sarah Dessen

As I rolled over, stretching out, my only thought was to go back to the dream I'd been having, which I couldn't remember, other than that it had been good, in that distant, hopeful way unreal things can...

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Sarah Dessen

If you're not getting hurt, you're not riding hard enough.

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Sarah Dessen

Theres this other half of him i dont know of, its like he is trying it keep it a secret.... if he would just let me inside so i can help

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Sarah Dessen

If he'd been any other boy, and this was any other world, I would have kissed him. Nothing could have stopped me.

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Sarah Dessen

It's not always easy being her daughter.' I think,' she said, 'sometimes it's hard no matter whose daughter you are.

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Sarah Dessen

There were so many people, so much to navigate, and as the distance fluctuated between us his hand kept slipping, down my arm to my wrist. And maybe he was going to let go as people pressed in on all sides,...

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Sarah Dessen

Writing a novel is like childbirth: once you realize how awful it really is, you never want to do it again.

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Sarah Dessen

This was just one night, one chance to vary and see where it took me. The fireflies were probably already out: maybe it wasn’t just a season or a time but a whole world I’d forgotten. I’d never know...

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Sarah Dessen

When you had to do something, you had to do it. And eventually, if you were lucky, you did it well.

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Sarah Dessen

It took a lot of work to be perfect. If you didn’t want to break a sweat, there was no point in even bothering.

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Sarah Dessen

I always tried to imagine what it would be like to open your door to find something you had given up on. maybe it had seen places you never had, been rerouted and passed through so many strange hands,...

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Sarah Dessen

And so really, you have given me no choice but to take you shopping by force.” She sighed, then reached up, dropping her sunglasses down from their perch on her head to cover her eyes. “Do you even...

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Sarah Dessen

I don't know," I said. "Maybe you're right, and all that stuff I think I missed is overrated. Why should I even bother? What's the point really?" He thought for a moment. "Who says there has to be a point?"...

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe if I'd agreed to do the debutante thing like she wanted. Or taken up pageants instead of riding jump bikes with a bunch of grungy boys. I'd always tell her, why can't I do both? Who says you have...

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Sarah Dessen

If you expect the worst, you'll never be disappointed.

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Sarah Dessen

I remembered Owen telling me how music had saved him in Phoenix, that it drowned everything out, and it was the same for me now. As long as I had something to listen to, I could blur the things I didn't...

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Sarah Dessen

What is family? They were the people who claimed you. In good, in bad, in parts or in whole, they were the ones who showed up, who stayed there, regardless.

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Sarah Dessen

But there was only one truth about forever that really mattered, and that was this: it was happening.

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Sarah Dessen

You couldn't see the key around my neck: it hung too low under both collars. But if I leaned in close, I could make it out, buried deep beneath. Out of sight, hard to recognize, but still able to be found,...

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Sarah Dessen

He was the closest thing I'd ever had to something, or someone, that mattered. But in the end, close didn't count. You were either in, or you weren't.

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Sarah Dessen

We all have one idea of what the color blue is, but pressed to describe it specifically, there are so many ways: the ocean, lapis lazuli, the sky, someone's eyes. Our definitions are as different as we...

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Sarah Dessen

It's all about you, Colie." She touched one finger to her temple, tap tap tap. "Believe in yourself up here and it will make you stronger than you could ever imagine." There is something infectious about...

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Sarah Dessen

it sounded stupid, but of course everything does when you're just getting the bare bones facts, only the basics...

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Sarah Dessen

Like I, of all people, didn't know better than to lead a total stranger to the point where they could hurt me most, knowing how easily they'd be able to find their way back to it.

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Sarah Dessen

There's just something obvious about emptiness, even when you try to convince yourself otherwise.

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Sarah Dessen

Hey, and for what it's worth? Friends don't leave you alone in the woods. Friends are the ones who come and take you out.

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Sarah Dessen

Some things are meant to be broken. Imperfect. Chaotic.

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Sarah Dessen

Only a real asshole takes liberties with someone else's car stereo. That's serious.

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe you could go backwards and forwards at the same time, but it wasn't easy. You had to want to.

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Sarah Dessen

Everyone had a forever.

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Sarah Dessen

'I don't get it,' Caroline said, bemused. 'She's the only one with wings. Why is that?'

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Sarah Dessen

I seriously doubt that the Santa police do an underwear check." -Cora

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Sarah Dessen

As he heard me approach, he quickly leaped up, grabbing a nearby loaf of bread and holding it in front of him as if struck by a sudden desire to make a sandwich.

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Sarah Dessen

I told you, everyone understands a quest.

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Sarah Dessen

And no relationship is perfect, ever. There are always some ways you have to bend, to compromise, to give something up in order to gain something greater.

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Sarah Dessen

But I think, personally, that it would be worse to have been alone all that time. Sure, maybe I would have protected my heart from some things, but would that really have been better? To hold myself apart...

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Sarah Dessen

But against love, the case was solid. Easily argued. And you could, indeed, hold it in your hand.

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Sarah Dessen

It's never long distance between friends.

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Sarah Dessen

I was bored. Sad. Lonely. It was only a matter of time before I cracked.

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Sarah Dessen

I hadn't said goodbye. It had been easier, like always, to just disappear, sparing myself the messy details of another farewell. Now, my fingers hovered over my track pad, moving the cursor down to his...

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Sarah Dessen

We can all be beautiful girls.

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Sarah Dessen

With total strangers, it had always been my policy to expect the worst. Usually they-and those that you knew best, for that matter-did not disappoint.

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Sarah Dessen

I'd known enough people for every minute of the day, and yet still didn't have anyone as my two a.m.

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Sarah Dessen

That was the thing: Once, the difference between light and dark had been basic. One was good, one bad. Suddenly, though, things weren’t so clear. The dark was still a mystery, something hidden, something...

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Sarah Dessen

The only trick was never giving more that you were willing to lose.

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Sarah Dessen

After all with me & Marshall, it had never been about words or conversation, where there was too much to be risked or lost. Here, though, in the quiet pressed against each other, this felt familiar...

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Sarah Dessen

It was like those songs I'd heard as a child, each so familiar, and all mine. When i got older and realized the words were sad, the stories tragic, it didn't make me love them any less. By then they were...

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Sarah Dessen

So many times it seemed like there were chances to stop things before they started. Or even stop them in midstream. But it was even worse when you knew in that very moment that there was still time to...

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Sarah Dessen

Quiet and incredible. I really envy that.

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Sarah Dessen

So this had been all I wanted, a boy who understood how I felt. Now, though, I sometimes wished for more.

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Sarah Dessen

Doesn't it seem sometimes that the whole world's uphill but at least we know the way back will be easy...

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Sarah Dessen

Family isnt about blood relationships, its about the meaning behind them. I relize now that sharing chromosoms is not the only way to having a family, its about the friendship behind it.

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Sarah Dessen

I don't know," I said. "What else did you do for your first eighteen years?" "Like I said," he said as I unlocked the car, "I'm not so sure that you should go by my example." "Why not?" "Because I have...

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Sarah Dessen

This thought was interrupted, suddenly, by a crash from the front entrance. We all looked over just in time to see Adam bending back from the glass, rubbing his arm. "Pull open," Maggie called out. As...

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Sarah Dessen

[Adam picks up the camera] "I have to get a shot of this." The reaction in the room was swift, and unanimous: every single person except me raised their hands at once to cover their faces. The accompanying...

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Sarah Dessen

It was like that part of my life, was just gone. It was almost too easy, for something I once thought had meant everything.

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Sarah Dessen

You know," I told him,"if you don't know how to eat a cupcake, that's nothing to be ashamed of." Now he did smile. "I know how to eat a cupcake." "Sure you do." "I do," he said. "I just don't want one...

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Sarah Dessen

Sometimes things don't turn out the way you want them to, Haven. Sometimes the people you choose to believe are wrong.

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Sarah Dessen

It's not always so simple, Haven. Sometimes there isn't a good guy and a bad guy. Sometimes even the ones you want to believe turn out to be liars.

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Sarah Dessen

You're not the kind of person who smiles for nothing, Colie. I have to earn every one.

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Sarah Dessen

She stroked my hair and told me I was beautiful, but I was old enough by then to know not to believe it anymore.

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Sarah Dessen

I had this wild thought that he was the only one in all this chaos who was just like me, and that was comforting and profound all at once.

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Sarah Dessen

I took his wildness from him and tried to fold it into myself, filling up the empty spaces all those second place finishes left behind.

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Sarah Dessen

See," he began, leaning back into the booth, "I was at this car dealership today, and I saw this girl. It was an across-a-crowded-room kind of thing. A real moment, you know?" I rolled my eyes. Chloe said,...

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Sarah Dessen

But all I could think of was how when nothing made sense and hadn't for ages, you just have to grab onto anything you feel sure of.

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Sarah Dessen

But what he didn't understand was that this dreamland was preferable,walking through this life half-sleeping,everything at arm's length or farther away. I understood those mermaids.I didn't care if they...

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Sarah Dessen

She tried to be someone people liked. She tried to be someone people disliked. But all I became was someone who didn't succeed with anything I tried to be.

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Sarah Dessen

Because now, I didn't care what they thought. It wasn't new, this realization that I would never be like them. What was different now was that I was glad. Macy page 199

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe that's what you got when you stood over your grief, facing it finally. A sense of its depths, its area, the distance across, and the way over or around it, whichever you chose in the end.

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Sarah Dessen

I am not breaking my rules,' I snapped, hating that I'd ended up on the advice-recieving end of things, jumping from Dear Remy to Confused in Cincinnati all in one summer.

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Sarah Dessen

He'd always had that fearless optimism that made cynics like me squirm. I wondered if it was enough for both of us. I would never know from here, though. And time was passing. Crucial minutes and seconds,...

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Sarah Dessen

The language of solace, and comets, and the girls we all become, in the end.

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Sarah Dessen

Morning would come before we knew it. It always did. But we still had the night, and for now, we were together, so I just closed my eyes and drank it all in.

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Sarah Dessen

Sometimes you dont even want to think aout what people are doing with their groceries.

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Sarah Dessen

I trailed off and he didn't push me to finish. I was finding that I liked that.

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Sarah Dessen

I waited. Because with Eli, he was never trying to get you to finish for him. He always knew where he was going, even if it took a little while to get there.

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Sarah Dessen

I'd still thought that everything I thought about that night-the shame, the fear-would fade in time. But that hadn't happened. Instead, the things that I remembered, these little details, seemed to grow...

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Sarah Dessen

She knew I could tell with one glance, one look, one simple instant. It was her eyes. Despite the thick makeup, they were still dark-rimmed., haunted, and sad. Most of all though, they were familiar. The...

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Sarah Dessen

Just because we don’t see eye to eye on everything doesn’t mean we can’t be close.

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Sarah Dessen

If you could just be nice, then you wouldn't have to worry about arguments at all. but being nice wasn't as easy as it seemed, especially when the rest of the world could be so mean.

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Sarah Dessen

I thought this was a cookout. You know, dogs and burgers, Tater Tots, ambrosia salad" Dexter picked up a box of Twinkies, tossing them into the cart. "And Twinkies." "It is,"..."Except that it's a cookout...

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Sarah Dessen

Are you crazy? Flirting with Eli Stock in front of Belissa Norwood, in Belissa Norwood’s house, while eating Belissa Norwood’s cupcakes?

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Sarah Dessen

It all depends on how you choose to live it. It's like forever, always changing.

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Sarah Dessen

Just because someone's pretty, doesn't mean she's decent.

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Sarah Dessen

Because anyone that can make you feel that bad about yourself is toxic.

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Sarah Dessen

The truth was, I wasn't sure. But I wanted to keep believing people could change, and it was certainly easier to do so when you were in the midst of it.

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Sarah Dessen

What do you do when you finally hear everything you've always thought said aloud?

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Sarah Dessen

Because if you were the problem, chances were you could also be the solution. The only way to find out was to take another shot.

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Sarah Dessen

It's still a memory worth having, even if it's not exactly what you imagined.

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Sarah Dessen

Look. We both know life is short, Macy. Too short to waste a single second with anyone who doesn't appreciate and value you.

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Sarah Dessen

It was just perfect, just right all at once.

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Sarah Dessen

It wasn't until Kiffney-Brown, when I met Jason Talbot, that I really thought I might actually have one of those boyfriend kind of stories to tell the next time I got together with my old friends. Jason...

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Sarah Dessen

It's hard to be nice when the rest of the world is so mean.

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Sarah Dessen

Sometimes a question can hurt more than an answer.

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Sarah Dessen

I was woundering what he would say, what word could sum me up right then, when i saw the lights come across his face, blaringly yellow, and suddenly he was brighter, and brighter, and i asked him what...

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Sarah Dessen

Don't think or judge, just listen.

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Sarah Dessen

It was hard to remember what the yard had looked like even twelve hours before, undisturbed and pristine. Like it takes so little to change something, but to make you forget the way it once was, as well.

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Sarah Dessen

Obviously it won't all run smoothly. But it's important to awknowledge that while we may make mistakes, in the long run, we may also learn fromt them.

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Sarah Dessen

You don't have to make things harder then they have to be just to prove a point.

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Sarah Dessen

Maybe my sister and I shared more than we thought. We were both waiting and wishing for something we couldn't completely control: I wanted to be alone, and she the total opposite. It was weird, really,...

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Sarah Dessen

But unfriendly is usually one of those things you pick up on right away. You know, like B.O. There's no hiding it if it's there.

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Sarah Dessen

Well, it's true that I have been hurt in my life. Quite a bit. But it's also true that I have loved, and been loved. and that carries a weight of its own. A greater weight, in my opinion. It's like that...

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Sarah Dessen

...You can't unlearn something, even if you want to. You know what you know.

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Sarah Dessen

…You don’t want the best of times to be just one thing, forever. You have to have a lot of bests of times, each one topping the last. You know?

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Sarah Dessen

There were endless ways to spend your days, I knew that, none of them right or wrong. But given the chance for a real do-over, another way around, who would say no?

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Sarah Dessen

You’re always a kid around your parents… Unless they’re acting like children. Then you don’t get the chance.

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Sarah Dessen

From up above, in a plane passing over, you’d just see one little light in all this dark, with no idea of the lives that were being lived within it, and in the house beside, and beside that one. So much...

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Sarah Dessen

…It’s not just where you go, but how you choose to get there.

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Sarah Dessen

There is never a time or place for true love. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment.

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Sarah Dessen

Life is an awful, ugly place to not have a best friend.

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Sarah Dessen

Wherever you will go, I will let you down, But this lullaby goes on.

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Sarah Dessen

Its 75 Degrees! In December!

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Sarah Dessen

its been a long night" "aren't they all?

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Sarah Dessen

But risk is just part of relationships. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't.

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Sarah Dessen

It wasn't like I was some expert on the meaning of being supportive. Was it being loyal even against your better judgement? Or, like Olivia, was it making your displeasure known from the start, even when...

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Sarah Dessen

Clearly, sharing something could take you a long way, or at least to a different place than you'd planned. Like a friendship or a family, or even jsut alone on a curb on a Saturday, trying to get your...

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Sarah Dessen

You're not a sucker. You're just nice. You give people the benefit of the doubt.

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Sarah Dessen

Needing was so easy: it came naturally, like breathing. Being needed by someone else, though, that was the hard part. But as with giving help and accepting it, we had to do both to be made complete-like...

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Sarah Dessen

There comes a point when things are undeniable and can't be hidden any longer. Even from yourself.

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Sarah Dessen

Looking at the pond, all I could think was that it is an incredivle thing, how a whole world can rise from what seems like nothing at all.

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Sarah Dessen

I wondered again why the right thing always seemed to be met with so much resistance, when you'd think it would be the easier path. You had to fight to be virtuous...

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Sarah Dessen

Life's too short to worry about the little things. Enjoy what you have today, not what you might get tomorrow

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Sarah Dessen

He shook his head. "Some people think that they like music,but they have no idea what it's really about. They're kindding themselves. Then there are people who feel strongly about music, but just aren't...

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Sarah Dessen

This is what daughters did. They left, and came home later with lives of their own.

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Sarah Dessen

In those first few hours officially single again the world seems like it expands, suddenly bigger and more vast now that you have to get through it alone.

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Sarah Dessen

I can say I made a lot of mistakes, but I don't regret things. Because at least I didn't spend a life standing outside, wondering what living would be like.

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Sarah Dessen

Everything, in the end, comes down to timing. One second, one minute, one hour, could make all the difference. So much hanging on just these things, tiny increments that together build a life. Like words...

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Sarah Dessen

What," I said, "is that a crime here or something? Like only buying one thing at the Gas/Gro?

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Sarah Dessen

You own a Tic Tac. Gum is just borrowed. - Esther

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Sarah Dessen

Call it crazy, or just chicken salad.

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Sarah Dessen

No, no, no to Tallyho.

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Sarah Dessen

You just walk over there and into the office and say, 'Hey, be my prom date,'" he said. "It's that simple.

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Sarah Dessen

very quietly, I heard a voice in my ear.It said, in a weird, cheesy, right-out-of-one-of-my-mother’s-novels way, “Ah. Wemeet again.” I turned my head, just slightly, and right there, practically...

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Sarah Dessen

And don't change for a guy, ever," Leah added. "If they're worthy, they'll like you just the way you are.

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Sarah Dessen

It was as familiar to me as a song I'd been hearing my whole life, covered by various people but the basic tune the same.

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Sarah Dessen

I thought of all the times we'd been together, how I kept coming closer, then retreating, while he stayed right where he was. A constant in a world where few, if any, really existed.

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Sarah Dessen

I'd been running for years: there was nothing scarier, to me, than to just be still with someone. And yet, there on that dark road, going home, I was.

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Sarah Dessen

Nah," I said. "But if it does, just tell him I said to get back on the bike." "What?" "He'll understand.

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Sarah Dessen

As impossible, in fact, as keeping the moon...So I looked down the line at all my friends, knowing I would always remember this. And then I turned my gaze back up to the sky, and put my faith in that moon...

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Sarah Dessen

In the end, though, maybe it's not how you reach a place that matters. Just that you get there at all.

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Sarah Dessen

I am coming to terms with the fact that loving someone requires a leap of faith, and that a soft landing is never guaranteed.

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Sarah Dessen

There comes a time in every life when the world gets quiet and the only thing left is your heart.

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Sarah Dessen

and I wondered if, in the end, this is how all disputes are settled, with a shared silence as things become equal. You take something from me, I take something from you. We all want balance, one way or...

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Sarah Dessen

I realized how truly hard it was, really, to see someone you love change right before your eyes. Not only is it scary, it throws your balance off as well.

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Sarah Dessen

I didnt pay atteniton to times or distance, instead focusing on how it felt just to be in motion, knowing it wasn't about the finish line but how I got there that mattered.

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Sarah Dessen

True friendship is a promise you keep forever.

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Sarah Dessen

You didn't have to take a punch for me, you know,' he said. 'I'm a lover, not a fighter.' 'You're a freak is what you are,' I said.

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Sarah Dessen

Stop it. Seriously. This isn't funny.' 'You're right.' A pause. 'It's pathetic.

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Sarah Dessen

Hey, think fast!' I just looked at Fave as he chucked the basketball at me with possibly the worst overhand throw I'd ever seen. It landed to my far right, then bounced past me, banging against my dad's...

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Sarah Dessen

nothing is guaranteed.... So don't be afraid. Be alive.

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Sarah Dessen

The only thing I can't stand more than seeing something done wrong is seeing it done slowly.

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Sarah Dessen

Now, now," my father said. "Let's just get the bags." This was typical. My father, the lone male in our estrogen-heavy household, had always dealt with any kind of emotional situation or conflict by doing...

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Sarah Dessen

Next thing you know she'll be on the bus and selling T-shirts in the parking lot, showing off her boobs to get in the stage door." "At least she has boobs to show," Jess said. "I have boobs," Chloe said,...

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Sarah Dessen

I bet you can't eat ten bananas!" "I bet you're right.

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Sarah Dessen

So finally, I decided that the best response — the safest — was none at all.

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Sarah Dessen

Please. She sighed. 'Can't a girl have high standards? I don't want an ordinary boy.

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Sarah Dessen

Apologies come in all shapes and sizes. You can give diamonds, candy, flowers, or just your deepest heartfelt sentiment.

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Sarah Dessen

And like my dad always said, the first step is always the hardest.

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Sarah Dessen

I wondered if it was really because he cared about me, or if now I was just another challenge.

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Sarah Dessen

Everything always gets crazy at the end. You just have to keep going, regardless of how awful it gets. So that's what I do.

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Sarah Dessen

It's so easy to get caught up in what people expect of you. Sometimes, you can just lose yourself.

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Sarah Dessen

And guys don't get attached, guys don't give themselves over completely, and guys lie. That's why they should be handled with great trepidation, not trusted, and held at arm's length whenever possible.

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Sarah Dessen

one word could change the whole world

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Sarah Dessen

Too many locks, not enough keys.

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Sarah Dessen

Okay, so if that's not real, what is? What counts, to you?" He thought for a second, then said, "I don't know. Just because someone's pretty doesn't mean she's decent. Or vice versa. I'm not into appearances....

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Sarah Dessen

That sucks, though," Wes said finally, his voice low. "You're just setting yourself up to fail, because you'll never get everything perfect." "Says who?" He just looked at me. "The world," he said, gesturing...

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Sarah Dessen

It's gonna be okay," I said. It was the first time in a long time that I believed it. "It will.

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Sarah Dessen

If you have just one person believe in you, you'll always find your way

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Sarah Dessen

I don't get it,' Caroline said, bemused. 'She's the only one with wings. Why is that?' There were so many questions in life. You couldn't ever have all the answers. But I knew this one. It's so she can...

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Sarah Dessen

It's hard to do," I said. Wes looked at me. "What is?" I swallowed, not sure why I'd said this out loud. "Get it right.

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Sarah Dessen

I'd been through so much, falling short again and again, and only recently had found a place where who I was, right now, was enough.

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Sarah Dessen

You knew the truth all along, Colie. That's all matters. You knew.

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Sarah Dessen

I'm really interested in the idea of anomynity and familiarity. And sunglasses, you know, are so indicatitve of that. I mean, they're worn by some people to hide themselves. But they're also a fashion...

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Sarah Dessen

It’s the things you fight for and struggle with before earning that have the greatest worth.

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Sarah Dessen

I was tired of hanging on, taking the torn pieces to make something whole with them.

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Sarah Dessen

As I stepped out to face myself in the mirror, reaching a hand to smooth away the steam, I saw myself differently. It was as if I had grown again as I slept, but this time just to fit my own size. As if...

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Sarah Dessen

I knew that it wouldn’t last. It was just a moment, a perfect moment, as time stood still and fleetingly everything fell back into its proper place.

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Sarah Dessen

Looking at her, I thought again how beautiful she was - even in jeans and a T-shirt, no makeup, she was breathtaking. So much so that it was hard to believe she could ever have looked at herself and seen...

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Sarah Dessen

It doesn't matter, anyway, why you like me. Just that you do.

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Sarah Dessen

Eventually, it wasn't even your dad I wanted, just anybody. Anybody at all.

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Sarah Dessen

It was like when you're a little kid and you run into your teacher or librarian at the grocery store or Wal-mart and it's just so startling, because it never occurred to you they existed outside of school.

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Sarah Dessen

Morgan sighed. "I," she announced, "am so pathetic." "You are not," I said. "I am." She went over and straightened the cling wrap, corner to corner. "Do you know how many times I've brought in devilled...

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Sarah Dessen

We sat there, not talking, for a few minutes. He ate the Moon Pie; only skinny people can scarf down junk food like that. Finally, I said, "Norman?" "Yeah?" "Are you ever going to show me the painting?"...

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Sarah Dessen

call it crazy, or just chicken salad. But within reason, or without it i was in it too.

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Sarah Dessen

It’s funny how one summer can change everything.

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Sarah Dessen

It was just one of those things," I said, "You know, that just happen. You don't think or plan. You just do it.

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Sarah Dessen

It's all in the view. That's what I mean about forever, too. For any one of us our forever could end in an hour, or a hundred years from now. You never know for sure, so you'd better make every second...

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Sarah Dessen

Because this is what happens when you try to run from the past. It just doesn’t catch up, it overtakes … blotting out the future.

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Sarah Dessen

No relationship is perfect, ever. There are always some ways you have to bend, to compromise, to give something up in order to gain something greater...The love we have for each other is bigger than these...

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Sarah Dessen

Love is needing someone. Love is putting up with someone's bad qualities because they somehow complete you.

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Sarah Dessen

The end of a wedding reception is always so depressing. And only the bride and groom are spared, jetting off into the sunset while the rest of us wake up the next morning to just another day.

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Sarah Dessen

All you could do was take on as much weight as you can bear. And if you're lucky, there's someone close enough by to shoulder the rest.

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Sarah Dessen

I would have thought this would make me feel better.. getting to be the one to leave and not the one left behind. But it didn't. Not at all.

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Sarah Dessen

It's the same thing,' I told her. 'What is?' 'Being afraid and being alive.' 'No,' she said slowly, and now it was as if she was speaking a language she knew at first I wouldn't understand, the very words,...

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Sarah Dessen

If someone is really close with you, your getting upset or them getting upset is okay, and they don't change because of it. It's just part of the relationship. It happens. You deal with it.

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Sarah Dessen

Like it takes so little not only to change something, but to make you forget the way it once was, as well.

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Sarah Dessen

I was just stock in the middle, vague and undefined.

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Sarah Dessen

The worst part was that I had things I wanted to tell my mother, too many to count, but none of them would go down so easy. She'd been through too much, between my siters-I could not add to the weight....

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Sarah Dessen

There was something so heavy about the burden of history, of the past. I wasn't sure I had it in me to keep looking back.

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Sarah Dessen

I was so scared about being discovered, but nobody came. Nobody heard. In my own ears, though, my sobs sounded primal and scary, like something I would have turned off if I'd been able to.

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Sarah Dessen

But as i lay there, it only seemes like silence filling my ears. And the thing was, it was so freaking loud.

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Sarah Dessen

You don't have to say it out loud. I already know why you like me.' 'You do, huh?' 'Yep.' He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer. 'So,' I said. 'Tell me' 'It's an animal attraction,' he...

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Sarah Dessen

But for now, I just sat there on the bed and listened to my song. The one that had been written for me by a man who knew me not at all, now sung by the one who knew me best.

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Sarah Dessen

Family isn’t something that’s supposed to be static, or set. People marry in, divorce out. They’re born, they die. It’s always evolving, turning into something else.

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Sarah Dessen

Forgiveness is hard. Acceptance is doable.

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Sarah Dessen

Sometimes really, really bad things happen to people, and there is no explanation and no reason whatsoever.

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Sarah Dessen

There are worse addictions than reality TV, chocolate and coffee.

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Sarah Dessen

The health of the people I love is all that really matters in this world. Period.

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Sarah Dessen

In midair, dangling lost above the world.

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Sarah Dessen

And to know me, as you have discovered, is to love me.

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Sarah Dessen

Just because something's damaged doesn't mean it shouldn't be treated with respect.' 'Ad,' Wallace said, 'it's a coffee table, not an orphan.

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Sarah Dessen

Okay," I said, "what's your biggest fear?" As always, he took a second to think about the answer. "Clowns," he said. "Clowns." "Yup." I just looked at him. "What?" he said, glancing over at me. "That is...

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Sarah Dessen

It’s never something huge that changes the everything, but instead the tiniest of details, irrevocably tweaking the balance of the universe while you’re busy focusing on the big picture.

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Sarah Dessen

I was worn out, broken: He had taken almost everything. But he'd been all I'd had, all this time. And when the police led him away, I pulled out of the hands of all these loved one, sobbing, screaming,...

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Sarah Dessen

A second later, when he looked up at me, we were face to face, and again, even under these circumstances, I was struck by how good looking he was, in that accidental, doesn't-even-know-it kind of way....

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Sarah Dessen

As if it didnt matter what was on, but instead how hard i was listening.

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Sarah Dessen

The thing is I'm a great believer in the perfect moment. They don't come around that often.

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Sarah Dessen

My sister, who never understood most of the things I wanted her to, might have been able to understand what had happened to me in this summer of weddings and beginnings. And she was right. The first boy...

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Sarah Dessen

I hoped that Grace would be a little bit of the best of all of us: Scarlett's spirit, and my mother's strength, Marion's determination, and Michael's sly humor. I wasn't sure what I could give, not just...

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Sarah Dessen

And always remember how much your crazy sister loves you.

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Sarah Dessen

Life has a way of disregarding even your best intentions.

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Sarah Dessen

Right now, though, I wanted not to think forward or backward, but only to lose myself in the words.

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Sarah Dessen

There comes a time when the world gets quiet and the only thing left is your own heart. So you'd better learn the sound of it. Otherwise you'll never understand what it's saying.

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Sarah Dessen

The first boy was always the hardest.

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Sarah Dessen

If this was my forever, I wouldn't want to spend it here.

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Sarah Dessen

Best Friends. And I thought of what she had done all the millions of times I cried to her, collapsing at even the slightest wounding of my heart or pride. So I reached over and pulled her to me, wrapping...

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Sarah Dessen

I had no illusions about love anymore. It came, it went, it left casualties or it didn't. People weren't meant to be together forever, regardless of what the songs say.

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Sarah Dessen

Some things don't last forever, but some things do. Like a good song, or a good book, or a good memory you can take out and unfold in your darkest times, pressing down on the corners and peering in close,...

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Sarah Dessen

Sometimes it seems safer to hold it all in, where the only person who can judge is yourself.

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Sarah Dessen

You can't always get the perfect moment. Sometimes, you just have to do the best you can under the circumstances.

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Sarah Dessen

Here was a boy who liked flaws, who saw them not as failings but as strengths. Who knew such a person could exist, or what would have happened if we'd found each other under different circumstances? Maybe...

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Sarah Dessen

It's a lot easier to be lost than found. It's the reason we're always searching and rarely discovered--so many locks not enough keys.

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Sarah Dessen

Once, this had been the life I’d wanted. Even chosen. Now, though, I couldn’t believe that there had been a time when this kind of monotony and silence, this most narrow of existences, had been preferable....

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Sarah Dessen

So while it seemed like you were seeing everything, you really weren't. Just bits and pieces that looked like a whole.

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Sarah Dessen

So many versions of just one memory, and yet none of them were right or wrong. Instead, they were all pieces. Only when fitted together, edge to edge, could they even begin to tell the whole story.

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Sarah Dessen

I thought again how you could never really know what you were seeing with just a glance, in motion, passing by. Good or bad, right or wrong. There was always so much more.

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Sarah Dessen

There has to be a middle. Without it, nothing can ever truly be whole. Because it is not just the space between, but also what holds everything together.

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Sarah Dessen

I wondered which was harder, in the end. The act of telling, or who you told it to. Or maybe if, when you finally got it out, the story was really all that mattered.

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Sarah Dessen

No matter how much time has passed, these things still affect us and the world we live in. If you don't pay attention to the past, you'll never understand the future. It's all linked together.

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Sarah Dessen

The past did affect the present and the future, in ways you could see and a million ones you couldn't. Time wasn't a thing you could divide easily; there was no defined middle or beginning or end. I could...

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Sarah Dessen

All I'd ever wanted was to forget. but even when I thought I had, pieces had kept emerging, like bits of wood floating up to the surface that only hint at the shipwreck below.

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Sarah Dessen

I understood now. This voice, the one that had been trying to get my attention all this time, calling out to me, begging me to hear it -- it wan't Will's. It was mine.

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Sarah Dessen

I'd been convinced I was on the outside, but really, I'd always been within arm's reach. All I had to do was ask, and I, too, would be easily brought back, surrounded and immersed, finding myself safe,...

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Sarah Dessen

Pieces and parts were always easier to process. The full picture, the entire story, was another thing entirely. But you just never knew. Sometimes, people could surprise you.

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Sarah Dessen

You should never be surprised when someone treats you with respect, you should expect it.

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Sarah Dessen

Events conspired to bring you back to where you'd been. It was what you did then that made all the difference: it was all about potential.

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Sarah Dessen

But you only get so many do-overs in this life, so many chances to, if not change your past, alter your future.

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Sarah Dessen

You could just tell when a person belonged somewhere. That is something you can't fake, no matter how hard you try

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“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”

― Dr. Seuss