Alistair Cooke quote

"I have an insane desire to shave a stroke or two off my handicap."

Alistair Cooke

Born: November 20, 1908

Die: March 30, 2004

Occupation: Journalist

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More quotes of Alistair Cooke

Alistair Cooke

Texas does not, like any other region, simply have indigenous dishes. It proclaims them. It congratulates you, on your arrival, at having escaped from the slop pails of the other 49 states.

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Alistair Cooke

To watch an American on a beach or crowding into a subway, or buying a theater ticket, or sitting at home with his radio on, tells you something about one aspect of the American character: the capacity...

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Alistair Cooke

Curiosity endows the people who have it with a generosity in argument and a serenity in their own mode of life which springs from their cheerful willingness to let life take the form it will.

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Alistair Cooke

A professional is someone who can do his best work when he doesn't feel like it.

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Alistair Cooke

To the goggling unbeliever Texans say, as people always say about their mangier dishes, 'But it's just like chicken, only tenderer.' Rattlesnake is, in fact, just like chicken - only tougher.

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Alistair Cooke

The best compliment to a child or a friend is the feeling you give him that he has been set free to make his own inquiries, to come to conclusions that are right for him, whether or not they coincide with...

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Alistair Cooke

Golf is an open exhibition of overweening ambition, courage deflated by stupidity, skill soured by a whiff of arrogance.

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Alistair Cooke

The best thing about Eisenhower's Presidency was his Jeffersonian conviction that there should be as little government and as much golf as possible.

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Alistair Cooke

To get an elementary grasp of the game of golf, a human must learn, by endless practice, a continuous and subtle series of highly unnatural movements, involving about sixty-four muscles, that result in...

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Alistair Cooke

It has been an unchallengeable American doctrine that cranberry sauce, a pink goo with overtones of sugared tomatoes, is a delectable necessity of the Thanksgiving board and that turkey is uneatable without...

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Alistair Cooke

In golf, humiliations are the essence of the game.

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Alistair Cooke

Cocktail music is accepted as audible wallpaper.

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Alistair Cooke

Every sport pretends to a literature, but people don't believe it of any other sport but their own.

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Alistair Cooke

There is even - as with no other game - a fascinating detective literature, a wry commentary on the human comedy, implicit in the book of rules.

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Alistair Cooke

I wrote to Mr. McEnroe, Senior. I said: "Here is the sentence once written by the immortal Bobby Jones. I thought you might like to have it done in needlepoint and mounted in a suitable frame to hang over...

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Alistair Cooke

So the British, of all ages, still walk the course. On trips to Florida or the American desert, they still marvel, or shudder, at the fleets of electric carts going off in the morning like the first assault...

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Alistair Cooke

It is a wonderful tribute to the game or to the dottiness of the people who play it that for some people somewhere there is no such thing as an insurmountable obstacle, an unplayable course, the wrong...

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Alistair Cooke

The Masters is more like a vast Edwardian garden party than a golf tournament.

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Alistair Cooke

The Scots say that Nature itself dictated that golf should be played by the seashore. Rather, the Scots saw in the eroded sea coasts a cheap battleground on which they could whip their fellow men in a...

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Alistair Cooke

I have an insane desire to shave a stroke or two off my handicap.

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Alistair Cooke

They have been playing golf for 800 years and nobody has satisfactorily said why.

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Alistair Cooke

The emblem on the necktie reserved for the members of the Royal and Ancient Golf Club of St. Andrews - The Vatican of golf - is of St. Andrew himself bearing the slatier cross on which, once he was captured...

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Alistair Cooke

[Golfers] are a special kind of moral relist who nips the normal romantic and idealstic yearnings in the bud by proving once or twice a week that life is unconquerable but endurable.

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Alistair Cooke

I hasten to say to snobs from the Surrey pine-and-sand country that no invention since the corn plaster or the electric toothbrush has brought greater balm to the extremities of the senior golfer than...

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Alistair Cooke

It rose slowly like a gull sensing a reckless blue fish to close to the surface, and then it dived relentlessly for the green, kicked and stopped three feet short of the flag.

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Alistair Cooke

Sir Guy Campbell's classic account of the formation of the links, beginning with Genesis and moving step by step to the thrilling arrival of 'tilth' on the fingers of coastal land, suggests that such notable...

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Alistair Cooke

Americans are less mystical about what produced their inland or meadow courses; they are the product of the bulldozerm rotary ploughs, mowers, sprinkler systems and alarmingly generous wads of folding...

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Alistair Cooke

More than anything else, though, to anyone who would write about it, golf offers a four-hour drama in two acts, which becomes memorable even in the tape-recorded reminiscenses of old champs, and which...

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Alistair Cooke

For many years I had an impression of my golf swing, which was that I vividly resembled Tom Weiskopf in the takeaway and Dave Marr on the downswing. Unfortunately, there came a day when I was invited to...

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Alistair Cooke

When that happens [the demise of golf], old men will furtively beckon to their sons and, like fugitives from the guillotine recalling the elegant orgies at the court of Louis XV, will recite the glories...

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Alistair Cooke

In the best of times, our days are numbered anyway. So it would be a crime against nature for any generation to take the world crisis so solemnly that it put off enjoying those things for which we were...

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Alistair Cooke

The day of judgment is either approaching or it is not. If it is not, there is no cause for adjournment. If it is, I choose to be found doing my duty. I wish therefore that candles may be brought.

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Alistair Cooke

Between a quarter and a third of Los Angeless land area is now monopolized by the automobile and its needs-by freeways, highways, garages, gas stations, car lots, parking lots. And all of it is blanketed...

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Alistair Cooke

People, when they first come to America, whether as travelers or settlers, become aware of a new and agreeable feeling: that the whole country is their oyster.

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Alistair Cooke

Hollywood grew to be the most flourishing factory of popular mythology since the Greeks.

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Alistair Cooke

Man has an incurable habit of not fulfilling the prophecies of his fellow men.

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Alistair Cooke

These doomsday warriors look no more like soldiers than the soldiers of the Second World War looked like conquistadors. The more expert they become the more they look like lab assistants in small colleges

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Alistair Cooke

As always, the British especially shudder at the latest American vulgarity, and then they embrace it with enthusiasm two years later

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Alistair Cooke

Las Vegas is Everymans cut-rate Babylon. Not far away there is, or was, a roadside lunch counter and over it a sign proclaiming in three words that a Roman emperors orgy is now a democratic institution....

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Alistair Cooke

New York is the biggest collection of villages in the world.

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Alistair Cooke

Curiosity is free-wheeling intelligence.

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Alistair Cooke

Liberty is the luxury of self-discipline, that those nations historically who have failed to discipline themselves have had discipline imposed by others.

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Alistair Cooke

I have an insane desire to shave a stroke or two off my handicap.

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Jaclyn Moriarty

...a choice had to be made when your husband said something unkind. Specifically: be cruel, be strong, or sulk. 'Be cruel' by saying an unkind thing back. 'Be strong' by choosing not to mind. But to do...

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Nate Ruess

As a songwriter I hate this whole, 'If it's a sad song, it has to sound like a sad song thing.' And that goes all the way back to my days with the Format. I'm an insane narcissist, so if I have to get...

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Gabriel Garcia Marquez

For a week I did not take off my mechanic's coverall day or night I did not bathe or shave or brush my teeth because love taught me too late that you groom yourself for someone you dress and perfume yourself...

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Chris Pratt

You know, I just tend to grow my beard out for 'Parks and Rec.' As an actor it's always easier to shave or cut your hair for a role, but it's hard to put fake hair on or grow hair for a role. When you...

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Jennifer Lawrence

I want to play a character I've never been before-a crazy serial killer like Charlize Theron in Monster. I'd love to have to shave my head.

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Marian Wright Edelman

When Jesus Christ asked little children to come to him, he didn't say only rich children, or White children, or children with two-parent families, or children who didn't have a mental or physical handicap....

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Carol Leifer

I suddenly had this really mad desire to have an affair with a woman. I was divorced. I was childless. I figured there's got to be one more way to really tick off my mom.

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Robert Winston

I was born with my moustache and, no, I've never been tempted to shave it off. I don't spend a lot of time worrying about my face and, like Gilbert and Sullivan's Katisha, my best feature is my left shoulder-blade.

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Jill Bolte Taylor

I realized, 'Oh my gosh! I'm having a stroke! I'm having a stroke!' The next thing my brain says to me is, 'Wow! This is so cool! How many brain scientists have the opportunity to study their own brain...

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Angela Carter

And each stroke of his tongue ripped off skin after successive skin, all the skins of a life in the world, and left behind a nascent patina of shining hairs. My earrings turned back to water and trickled...

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George R. R. Martin

I heard of a man who had a razor made of Valyrian steel. He cut his head off trying to shave.

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Denzel Washington

It was never my dream to be famous. I didn’t start acting to be a movie star. I started in the theater and my desire was to get better at my craft. It’s still my desire. I don’t consider myself a...

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Clive James

It is almost better to be an impulse shirt-buyer than an impulse shoe-buyer. I have worn shirts that made people think I was a retired Mafia hit-man or a Yugoslavian sports convener from Split, but I have...

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Cassandra Clare

Sorry,” she said breathlessly. “I got lost in the crowd.” “I noticed,” he said. “One second I was dancing with you, and the next you were gone and a very persistent werewolf was trying to get...

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Sammy Davis, Jr.

My handicap? Man, I am a one-eyed, black Jew! That's my handicap!

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George Orwell

It had become usual to give Napoleon the Credit for every Successful achievement and every stroke of good fortune. You would often hear one hen remark to another, “Under the guidance of our leader, Comrade...

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Jessica Cox

Handicaps are mindsets. Whatever it is that stands in the way of achieving something, that's when it's a handicap. I prefer to see them as obstacles or challenges. This is how I've been my whole life....

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Kate Winslet

I'm a normal human being. I don't have any desire to change my body as a result of having had two kids. That's a good thing, isn't it?

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Dominic Monaghan

I won't miss having to stand for two hours at 4:30 a.m. and have freezing cold glue applied to my feet. I won't miss two-hour drives to work or long, long, long days sitting in my trailer waiting...waiting...waiting....

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Bonnie Hunt

I won't wear fur - never, ever. I'm an animal lover. I wouldn't even wear faux fur. I prefer to go the cheap route and not shave my legs.

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“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”

― Dr. Seuss